all that you need is in your soul
i have had some crazy times in the last few weeks. my schedule is so solid that getting a haircut requires alterations of an entire day. i almost get uneasy when my boss tells me i dont need to work a certain day because im like, wow, i have a day off! imagine that. ill be a bartender in july at bennigans, im pretty excited.
recording is taking forever. hopefully we can get shit together in the next month or so. itll be a treat for new listeners, but its becoming more of an effort because we are all so picky. we could have a completely perfect track and with one mood swing decide to delete it all and start over with a totally new intention. THINGS WILL NEVER GET DONEEEEE.
my parents are hating me more and more each day. i was supposed to move out but finances got in the way. i am tryin to get things squared off so i can have the choice to stay or go. they just ask so much of me and im rarely here, why cant they just leave me alone? i do miss my brothers though, they are growing up so fucking fast, its like everytime i look at them they are taller..i swear..
i was reading through alot of my older entries, and some of the older entries of others. i was really surprised how much i have changed within this last year. i have also seen how my life with others have changed as well...you would never think that some of the shit i was so happy/unhappy about at the time would only be a small memory now. it didnt sadden me or anger me, instead it made me smile to know that i was so lucky to have shared good times with others and to have given them some sort of happiness at the time. i really have grown up so much from everything, i feel alot wiser and more focused on things that i want and need....want and need, two totally opposite meanings that i never used seperately until now. things i wanted were not things i needed, and i completely understand the difference now. whew, took long enough. life is just a game of trial and error. but for some reason, i always come out of every situation with this great understanding and appreciation for all the pain and sorrow i went through. its an amazing feeling. its just one of those struggles you have to overcome at the time, and realize that everything isnt as bad as it may seem.
ahh its almost 4am, i should probably get to bed.
i hope everyone who reads this has been in someway affected (mostly in a good way) by me. because i have been from you. i promise.
recording is taking forever. hopefully we can get shit together in the next month or so. itll be a treat for new listeners, but its becoming more of an effort because we are all so picky. we could have a completely perfect track and with one mood swing decide to delete it all and start over with a totally new intention. THINGS WILL NEVER GET DONEEEEE.
my parents are hating me more and more each day. i was supposed to move out but finances got in the way. i am tryin to get things squared off so i can have the choice to stay or go. they just ask so much of me and im rarely here, why cant they just leave me alone? i do miss my brothers though, they are growing up so fucking fast, its like everytime i look at them they are taller..i swear..
i was reading through alot of my older entries, and some of the older entries of others. i was really surprised how much i have changed within this last year. i have also seen how my life with others have changed as well...you would never think that some of the shit i was so happy/unhappy about at the time would only be a small memory now. it didnt sadden me or anger me, instead it made me smile to know that i was so lucky to have shared good times with others and to have given them some sort of happiness at the time. i really have grown up so much from everything, i feel alot wiser and more focused on things that i want and need....want and need, two totally opposite meanings that i never used seperately until now. things i wanted were not things i needed, and i completely understand the difference now. whew, took long enough. life is just a game of trial and error. but for some reason, i always come out of every situation with this great understanding and appreciation for all the pain and sorrow i went through. its an amazing feeling. its just one of those struggles you have to overcome at the time, and realize that everything isnt as bad as it may seem.
ahh its almost 4am, i should probably get to bed.
i hope everyone who reads this has been in someway affected (mostly in a good way) by me. because i have been from you. i promise.