(no subject)
Time to buy and time to lose, there's never a wish better than this.
Who and what I am is still out of reach, but it doesn't weigh as heavily on me anymore. It helps that I've surrounded myself with supportive people, no matter what. Of course, reconciling my faith with who I'm attracted to is a huge obstacle to overcome. No, I haven't told my parents, and I don't know if I will. I don't even know if I have to, really.
I think my mom knows. The last time we spoke, she said she'd be happy if I found someone nice, the first time she didn't say "a nice girl." And her emphasis didn't make it seem like the girl part was implied, but...not quite sure. I can never be quite sure.
There's still a lot of soul searching to do, but...I'm less inclined to "pray away my disease," as it were. I think it helps that there's a new priest at my church, guy who studied at a seminary in Australia. Really nice and welcoming to everyone, and I get English practice when I serve at the non-Japanese Mass. I brought up in a very vague way something about not following the "intended plan" as it were, and he confirmed exactly what I hoped. That the way my life unfolds is my intended plan, and that as long as I have faith, that's what counts in the end. Well, that and trying to be Christlike, of course...but even then, I was reminded that the whole "loving and accepting" thing does start with myself.
All right, Yoshirou. You can do this.
I'm gay.
Who and what I am is still out of reach, but it doesn't weigh as heavily on me anymore. It helps that I've surrounded myself with supportive people, no matter what. Of course, reconciling my faith with who I'm attracted to is a huge obstacle to overcome. No, I haven't told my parents, and I don't know if I will. I don't even know if I have to, really.
I think my mom knows. The last time we spoke, she said she'd be happy if I found someone nice, the first time she didn't say "a nice girl." And her emphasis didn't make it seem like the girl part was implied, but...not quite sure. I can never be quite sure.
There's still a lot of soul searching to do, but...I'm less inclined to "pray away my disease," as it were. I think it helps that there's a new priest at my church, guy who studied at a seminary in Australia. Really nice and welcoming to everyone, and I get English practice when I serve at the non-Japanese Mass. I brought up in a very vague way something about not following the "intended plan" as it were, and he confirmed exactly what I hoped. That the way my life unfolds is my intended plan, and that as long as I have faith, that's what counts in the end. Well, that and trying to be Christlike, of course...but even then, I was reminded that the whole "loving and accepting" thing does start with myself.
All right, Yoshirou. You can do this.
I'm gay.