audio.

[tobestronger]

[His voice is hesitant at first.] So...has everyone come back to their senses yet?

Comments

[Voice;]

[weaktobullets]

Didn't change.

[A pause.] You holdin' up okay?

[Voice;][Private]

[tobestronger]

Am I holding up okay? Mitsuru was murdered, Shinji. And we couldn't do anything. What do you think?

[Voice;][Private]

[weaktobullets]

[The flinch is almost audible, and there's a pause.]

You think I don't know? [A short exhale.] ...What else'm I supposed to ask, Aki?

[Voice;][Private]

[tobestronger]

[He's quiet for a moment before responding. Haha, subject change.] There are two of you.

[Voice;][Private]

[weaktobullets]

[Oh, subject change. Always the best.] ...Yeah. Weird as hell.

[A short, forced laugh.] Guess yours got up.

[Voice;][Private]

[tobestronger]

The doctors all said it was impossible, too. I guess you're a lot stronger tha you think.

[Voice;][Private]

[weaktobullets]

[There's a pause on his end. Mostly because... this is so surreal.] ...I dunno. I ain't really talked to him much.

You wanna grab food sometime? Been a bit.

[Voice;][Private]

[tobestronger]

[Casually talking was one thing, but Mitsuru had told him a lot about what had happened. They weren't exactly on good terms. Apparently Shinji just didn't know that.]

I don't know. Have you gotten all the jealousy out of your system yet? Or did you finally want to talk to me about something instead of treating Mitsuru like a go-between?

[Voice;][Private]

[weaktobullets]

[There's a pause again: this time almost annoyed.]

I talked to her, Aki. Before all this shit happened.

If you don't wanna, then just say that. [The snippy comments make it harder to want to apologize.]

[Voice;][Private]

[tobestronger]

[He's quiet for a moment before continuing.] Yeah, she told me. I'm just wondering why I'm hearing about all your issues with us from her. Are you going to explain?

[Voice;][Private]

[weaktobullets]

You ain't the one I needed to apologize to.

The hell's dragging this up gonna do 'cept piss us both off?

[Voice;][Private]

[tobestronger]

It already pissed me off, Shinji, but you got to avoid dealing with me, and I never got any gratification. I should knock the crap out of you for talking to her like that.

[Voice;][Private]

[weaktobullets]

Ain't like you don't know where I stay, Aki. If you need your damn gratification, then fine.

[Voice;][Private]

[tobestronger]

[He heaves a heavy sigh.] What the hell is your problem, Shinji?

[Voice;][Private]

[weaktobullets]

I told you, me an' her already talked about this.

[A pause, and then:] What happened to you Aki? Why're you so hung up on this shit? [Between killing the shade of Takaya in cold blood, this... had his death(coma?) really driven Akihiko to this point?] What do you even want?

[Voice;][Private]

[tobestronger]

[How could he possibly explain that, with all the things he's been forced to see Mitsuru go through and not be able to change, after her blaming herself for killing him, after her being kidnapped and brutally tortured, after her selling her soul to get his life back because she felt responsible, after watching her memory of her father's death, after learning how she dwells on that cave, after watching her be brutally murdered...and again, powerless to do anything...after all of that, he felt like he was useless to protect her from anything, let alone everything. How could he explain that when he didn't even fully understand his feelings about it himself? How could he explain that it mixes with his unrequited guilt over Miki's death and feeling responsible for Shinjiro's downward spiral? How could he possibly explain all that?]

If you haven't noticed, Shinji, everyone around me has a tendency of either dying or being hurt more than I could ever fix, and I'd kind of like that to stop, especially when it's coming from my closest friend