ughhhh !!!!!!!!!!!!
okay so things just totally suck . i hate living here more then anything in the world and i just want to go back to lindenhurst. I miss everyone so much . I miss julian more then anything it totally sucks that i cant see him until like christmas break cause my parents fucking suck. He really makes me so happy more then anything and i love him with all more heart and i deff dont want to lose him i want to be with him FOREVER.If it wasnt for julian idk where i would be. anyways iv bin sleeping thats cause vic has bin sleeping with me cause i need someone with me to put me to sleep. i want to be with everyone again in lindenhurst cause i seriously dont belong here i cant even get a fucking job cause there fucking hicks and they dont like people from long island which is fucking retarted. anyways today i went to school and cryed like 3 period cause i was just thinking about everyone and what i would be doing if i was in lindenhurst and i was thinking about how like i used to come home from school and tennis then my baby was comming to get me and we used to have the best times together. i feel like my parents dont even give a fuck no more.all as they care about is themself they dont care that im miserable here . anyways i wish i new what to say to people sometimes but i just cant. im gonna go i miss u lindy and i miss and love you so much julian