i really miss that guy who wrote that song about me
and i really miss my mom. the mom who loves me no matter what.
they havent called me & its been almost a week since i last said a word to them.
being homeless really sucks. im going to get my shit together & blow everyone's mind.
you think i need you, but i dont. i can take care of myself & i will prove it to you. to everyone who thinks they help me out so much letting me use their car or live at their house... i just want someone to be nice to me. i dont care if your nice by letting me use your shit, i would rather you give me your heart & sincerity. someone who says, i love you no matter what.
i love you whether your bald or fat or have nubbings instead of arms or feet.
so far, i have only found that my friends will love me no matter what.
not even "the love of my life" is here for me right now. he is too busy staying up all night & sleeping all day & doing his moms dishes & writing music for his band to help us get a better life. so i will have to get a better life on my own. im sorry, i can not let you bring me down anymore. & im sorry love, i can not just be happy lying in bed with you all day. i could be happy doing that... but there is more to life then that. you have to get up at some point. i want to see your potential, but if you cant see mine... i am not strong enough to be positive for two people.
you need to be positive for yourself before i can be positive for you, i am not strong enough to convince you. but that is the whole point... so that when i am down, you can bring me up and the other way around. how do you not get that?
its that easy. yet, the guy who wrote that song about me, hes not here. im not sure where he is, but its not here.
sometimes im going to fall, i need you to come save me. and if you fall, you know i would save you... i would never tell you that you didnt appriciate what ive done for you. i would MAKE you stay with me ESPECIALLY if i knew you had no where to go. thank u tho, now i see what you really are. you are about to lose the only person who has ever loved you in your entire life. your going to lose me again. & this time, who knows for how long. how can one person make you SOOO happy, but then make you SOOO sad?
i hope you can see your potential, and soon, because otherwise im just gunna have to work everything out on my own. i cant stand u not understanding me anymore. i have to go.