Lost Amidst Shadows: Ch. 1 (a TVXQ fanfic)
Title: Lost Amidst Shadows
Rating: PG-13 (for now)
Universe:TVXQ!
Pairing: YunJae / ??
Warning/s: None for now, except that I did this on the fly. With no beta. You've been duly warned.
Chapter: ?/2
Archive: Please ask.
Genre: Angst/Supernatural/Myth
Author's Disclaimer: This fanfic is done solely for entertainment, with no profits derived.
Author's note: This will most likely end up as a multi-parter drabble, set in the same universe. I am trying desperately to not have a complicated plot for this. Seriously. SERIOUSLY.
Much thanks, YunJae lurve and Tohoshinki plushies for the prompts to red_planet31 and sin_delight
Summary: Growing up meant changes, but he never expected this. Jaejoong will learn that blood would mean nothing and everything, and love might not hold the power he once thought it could.
"...hontoni saiko desu! Domo arigato, minna-san!"
Thank god, it was finally over. Jaejoong felt his smile slipping, growing a little tremulous, and ignored Changmin's whispered jibe of "You're not gonna cry, are you, hyung?" It took some effort, but he hitched up the faltering grin, waving enthusiastically at the sweating, screaming crowd. The thousands of red glow sticks wavered and danced in his vision, while darkness crept in alarmingly at the edges. Under the pretense of scooping up the leftover streamers, he scrubbed surreptitiously at his eyes, careful to not disturb his contacts but it only provided temporary relief. His world blurred alarmingly as he blew the silver streamers into Junsu's face, smirking automatically at the dolphin-like yelp it produced.
Jaejoong didn't know how he managed to get off the stage without falling flat on his face, or how he even answered the interviewer's questions afterwards - it was all a blur of noise and lights, a weariness that felt heavier than lead dragging his limbs down worse than anything he ever felt.
Someone, Yoochun, asked him something, he answered. Oh, it must have been a funny answer, because the rest of the them were laughing, Changmin's playful slap on his back almost sending him sprawling to the ground.
Smile, smile and look pretty; that was his mantra. Smile, look pretty and pray to god he could stay conscious.
*********
"Jaejoongie! Did you fall asleep? I want to bath too, you know!" The impatient rap on the bathroom door jolted him out of the blankness he had fallen in, water sloshing against the rim of the bathub and spilling a little on the floor. His mind felt coated with a layer of sludge, thoughts slow and heavy, moving ponderously. Yoochun knocked again, irritation coming through as clearly as if the younger man stood in the damp, steaming bathroom with him.
"Yeah--" he coughed, clearing his throat, and tried again. "Yeah, I'm almost done, hold on." More water spilled as he climbed clumsily out, tentatively placing a trembling foot on the damp floor. There was a near miss, but he managed to get himself out of the tub and a towel securely wrapped around his waist without incident. The door opened to reveal Micky, frowning, the lines growing deeper as he took in his hyung's state.
"Jaejoongie," Yoochun said slowly, towel hanging lax in his hand. "Are you okay? You look bad."
Smile, smile and look pretty.
"Ah, I'm just all wrinkled from sitting too long in the bath. But the water's still hot," he gestured invitingly. The suspicion in Yoochun's eyes were slow to disappear and he hurriedly looked for a distraction. "I'm going to make some bibimbap. You want some?"
The mention of food did the trick. The corners of Yoochun's eyes crinkled, a quicksilver grin there and gone.
"Cool, I was getting hungry. So's Min, I think."
"I'll make enough for everyone," Jaejoong assured, a little voice at the back of his head asking why was he keeping it quiet. Their health was important after all - a sick member would affect their schedule, would cause more stress on leader-ssi.
That's precisely why, he answered the voice silently. The T tour had just ended, and a week in the studio to finish their fourth Korean studio album was scheduled. Manager-ssi had already gotten them lined up interviews on KBS and M-net and god knows what else. He couldn't afford to fall sick now. He dressed mechanically, the world strangely muffled, the lethargy more than an impending fever could account for. With slow steps, he shuffled out of the room he shared with Yoochun, past the living room where Junsu and Changmin both were playing Guitar Hero and into the kitchen.
"Hey, are you gonna cook?" Yunho looked up from the manga he was reading, glasses perched at the end of his nose, hair damp and curling from his own shower. The familiar sight would have put a smile on Jaejoong's face, but this time, it was too much of an effort.
He nodded silently, opening the fridge and pulling out the ingredients he needed by rote. The official cook of the group knew where everything was by heart, and could navigate the refridgerator while asleep - the other members knew better than to mess up the system he had. "Where's the carrot?" he frowned. They still had a few sticks left, he remembered, and turned at Yunho's sheepish laugh.
"Sorry." Their leader held up a plastic bag, a lone carrot inside. "I got hungry."
Surprisingly, a heat of anger coursed through him, lifting some of the heavy fog. "You know I was going to use that," he snapped, closing the fridge door with a heavy hand. "Why c--"
"What? Sorry! Can't hear you!" Mouth parted in surprise, Jaejoong watched dumbly as Yunho chose that precise moment to act like a little kid, hands clasped to his ears and chanting gleefully, a wicked smirk on the handsome face.
"You're an idiot," he announced.
"Sorry! Still can't hear you! What did you say?!"
"I said, you're a damn idiot."
Silence fell in the kitchen, as did the grating, wailing noises of electronic guitars from the living room. Jaejoong blinked slowly, wondering why the usual insult could shut the leader up during one of his immature act, and felt a stinging pain from the palm of his hand.
Oh. It wasn't the babo that did it. It was the hand currently pressed on top of the kitchen table. Judging from the pain, he must have slapped the wooden top pretty hard.
"No need to get so angry, Joongie," Yunho said slowly, eyeing him carefully, the affectionate nickname obviously deliberate. "We can skip the carrots, or I can go to the store if you really want it." Curious heads, one a tousled wave of inky black, the other, ruffled with hints of mahogany (Changmin and Junsu, a voice whispered) poked around the kitchen door.
"Hyung, everything alright?" Changmin frowned, looking older than his twenty years of age in his concern.
"Yes," Jaejoong growled, eyes fixed on a bewildered Yunho. "Everything's just damn...fine."
The floor rushed up to meet him, cries of surprise and dismay ringing distantly in his ears.
Smile, smile and look pretty.
To be continued?