Mar 15, 2005 12:57
Okay. well we're back again and life...well it may have no meaning whit! I don't know anymore. Chris...well I will always love you. No matter what happens. I just can't understand this whole situation. It makes me cry and I end up worse than I already am. I'm sick of crying. I have cried tears until I have none left. I didn't get much sleep and I am extremely tired. Most of my friends are angry at me for not hanging out with them but that is so by choice. I can't understand many of the facts that life throws at me no matter how hard I try. Last nite was like a bad nitemare even though I didn't wake up to find that it was. I woke up to find that it was real life. I wanna cry but tears no longer fall. I hope things get so much better than they are. I hope that we can work hard and get past this. We have worked so hard and I don't wanna let it go so easily. Life always has sucked and previous papers in my room sit on shelfs that prove that. Chris is one person that has made me think less of suicide and be more happy. Chris is one person who has actually made me give a damn. I can't just let this all go so easily. Suicide is overrated. Well I have to go. I hope I can make things better. I dunno.