These Days
Title: These Days
Author: unconditional_w
Pairing: Naomi/Emily
Rating: R for Language
Summary: They remember. Everything.
A/N: So I’ve recently rewatched skins series 3 and fell even harder in love with these two. So let’s just pretend series 4 never happened. Cos honestly, they change a ridiculous amount and it makes no sense.
These days have been good
for me.
- Believer by Susanna and the Magical Orchestra
She remembers. She remembers that hiccupping moment when the hiccupping ‘Naomi Campbell’ is announced, and how it has to be repeated on the fucking megaphone, just to come right back around and slap her silly; She’s in your form. She’s in your form.
And she remembers the first time she denies that she’s gay. And it’s so horrible, and it’s not even really true, she’s not Gay. She just...wanted to kiss her. Now. Today, tomorrow.
She remembers that fucking pyjama party, and how the singing could be heard from the outside of a perfectly coiffed house with bright flowers and an even lawn, and how she couldn’t really remember why she bothered to come at all.
She can’t forget the first time she saw her naked torso, under a rich blue bra, and how badly she felt, the embarrassment warmly pooling in her stomach, rising rising rising up her chest and flaming hot around her ears and eyes, and she felt so horrid for looking but she can’t look away.
She remembers how their kiss, their second kiss, was everything their first was going to be had they not been interrupted. Sweet, and slow, and lovely. And Emily’s hair was so, so red. And lips so soft. Just as soft as she’d remembered.
She’ll always remember how right it felt to stop lying to herself when she admitted it outloud. She’s gay. And that’s more than okay. And she can’t remember why she was denying it to begin with.
She doesn’t even try to forget how regardless of where she was in school during that long, stupid, pointless week, Emily was always there to support, with this look on her face, of total admiration and appreciation.
She’ll never forget how wonderful it was that she didn’t initiate the kiss by the lake, that she sat, and waited, and all of a sudden it came so softly, the way she’d dreamed it would. Naomi was everything she dreamt she would be. Hesitant, and passionate, and tender. Tender.
She remembers how she made her come twice, first with lips and tongue, then with fingers. She remembers how she grabbed onto her shoulders and bucked against her so many times, pushing their bodies together, gasping against her lips, even moaning her name Em.
She remembers how numbingly scary it was to sit outside that doorstep, and open her heart to a closed door, and how she couldn’t stop the tears, how the moments only grew more and more terrifying when Emily would pause in their silences.
She remembers Emily’s hand, warm in hers, squeezing and holding, and how she felt that hold everywhere. Everywhere.
She’ll always remember that moment when it all just fell to bits and pieces, and she let it all go, and pushed her up against a locker just to hold her, just to feel her, just to have her put her hands on her neck. And then she mumbled the words she didn’t even know she needed to hear
It’s okay. It’s okay.
She remembers that she made her come twice, first with fingers, then with lips and tongue. She remembers stripping off Katie's clothes, barely, just moving fabric aside to reach that familiar warm skin, so warm, and tiny hands always grabbing her closer, and her lips always reaching for hers, always gasping Naomi.
She remembers how used she felt, how tossed aside and second fiddle, just as lost and forgotten as her fucking shoes. How silly it is, how silly she was, to let a girl know you, touch you, love you.
She remembers how pretty Emily was, in a plain purple dress Katie no doubt forced her into, with another bow in her hair, and too much makeup that could easily be smeared off in the proper context.
She remembers fighting with Katie, and then Emily fighting with Katie, and everyone fighting everyone, and suddenly she’s telling the world that she loves her, and she remembers that horrible spotlight suddenly panning on her, and it felt like the world had just opened itself to her, and Emily was standing there, so lost, and in love, and with her.
She remembers when she extended her hand, in front of everyone. As if to say
It’s okay.
She remembers how bright the sky was when she told it, “I love you, too.”
She remembers how tender it was, that “I love you, too.”