I think hormones are not your friend. I know they are not my friend. I hate that the one day out of 60 that I wake up refreshed and happy and excited to see what the day brings is the weird day. I want to feel that hope and exuberance for life most days, and the norm for me now be my sick day. I told Jason, I don't think he gets it. I don't feel good most of the time. I have a dull headache or I am exhausted or grouchy. I am almost positive it is hormones. :( As for the house, I totally know what you mean. I would love that, in fact at this point I would just like to have my own space at all. I have heard of people who have had their house burn down and things like that, that it is very liberating not to have stuff. I can see their point, but I really like my stuff. :) I have gotten to where I don't ask Jason what he thinks for things for the house. I just do it, I am lucky in that he doesn't usually care one way or the other, it makes it much easier though because I can buy what I love. I hate buying things just to have something that fits or matches. It's a trapping feeling to me, because then if I don't use it to the tune of however much it cost me, I can't get rid of it and then it piles up. It is a great feeling when you can purge some of that stuff though. As far as zen I bet feeling better would go a long way toward that, because really, if you felt good and rested and happy, what else do you need? Handling people and their wakadooness goes much better then. love you and love your goals!
the point you made about hormones links up with the doctor vs. life change question. i'm not taking any suppliments (hormones or otherwise) so it's either what i'm putting in me is too processed, i need to be putting hormones or otherwise in me, i'm just perpetually broken (lol), or i need to exercise in addition to one or more of the other choices. i really should just get the motivation to get to the holistic dr i have info for but therein presents the original problem of feeling like a tired, tired girl most of the time - and feeling like that makes you not want to do anything at all. even call the farging doctor.
nick isn't too bad, but it is still different than me. i want to live in "simple" but "with character" and he wants to live in a lennar model home of ugly dark perfection *blech* but i figure it's only fair to remember that he lives there too and i would be sad if he told me to shhsh it so i try not to tell him to shhsh it (in that regard, anyways...)
sometimes i wish it would explode :/ then i wouldn't have to torment myself with decisions. the good news is that we are having a march of dimes benefit yard sale and i am going to purge my house. like... overly purge. it's going to be glorious. as long as i don't wimp out.
and i agree that feeling better is a huge part of zen.
As for the house, I totally know what you mean. I would love that, in fact at this point I would just like to have my own space at all. I have heard of people who have had their house burn down and things like that, that it is very liberating not to have stuff. I can see their point, but I really like my stuff. :) I have gotten to where I don't ask Jason what he thinks for things for the house. I just do it, I am lucky in that he doesn't usually care one way or the other, it makes it much easier though because I can buy what I love. I hate buying things just to have something that fits or matches. It's a trapping feeling to me, because then if I don't use it to the tune of however much it cost me, I can't get rid of it and then it piles up. It is a great feeling when you can purge some of that stuff though.
As far as zen I bet feeling better would go a long way toward that, because really, if you felt good and rested and happy, what else do you need? Handling people and their wakadooness goes much better then.
love you and love your goals!
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nick isn't too bad, but it is still different than me. i want to live in "simple" but "with character" and he wants to live in a lennar model home of ugly dark perfection *blech* but i figure it's only fair to remember that he lives there too and i would be sad if he told me to shhsh it so i try not to tell him to shhsh it (in that regard, anyways...)
sometimes i wish it would explode :/ then i wouldn't have to torment myself with decisions. the good news is that we are having a march of dimes benefit yard sale and i am going to purge my house. like... overly purge. it's going to be glorious. as long as i don't wimp out.
and i agree that feeling better is a huge part of zen.
<3
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