goals
everybody needs goals, right? right...? right. so here are a few of mine.
1. i would love to live in a house that i am at peace in. or apartment or whatever. before i had my first apartment, i felt like i needed my own place because i had lots of stuff (or really, just the right amount of stuff) and that i needed a larger space to contain it properly. i really felt like my first apartment was that place. then i accumulated more stuff. and then i inherited my husband's stuff. and then i started buying stuff to make my home homier while still respecting my husband's sense of style (or lack thereof) that i wasn't really in love with. and then i started dealing with my emotions and the lack of control i had over my life by buying more stuff. and now i feel like i live in an eternal project. not a home, but a space with constant need for attention and tweaking and cleaning and rearranging. i need to throw out more stuff. i need to shred practically every piece of mail that i am terrified to look at because i don't know if it will have a letter in it saying that the bank is coming to take our house the next day. or reminding me how much money we owe in medical bills. or other bills. yeah. my goal is to live in a place that is not what i described above.
2. i want to be zen girl. i'm not sure if this is achievable with my personality type, but i want to be zen girl. and that's not to say that i want to do yoga on my front porch every morning (although that would be AWESOME if i was that zen girl... but i know i am shooting too high if i even begin to list that as a goal...), but i want to genuinely want to help people - whether they are popular or likable, or annoying, or smart, or dumb, or weird, or anything. i want to just be positive and accept people for who they are including myself. always. or at least - mostly "always."
3. i want to not feel like physical trash all the time. not sure if this will be achieved by doctors or lifestyle changes or both but yes.
4. if i'm going to be creative, i want to just be creative already. and stop having 1000 unfinished projects.
i think that is a good start. *curtsies and exits*
1. i would love to live in a house that i am at peace in. or apartment or whatever. before i had my first apartment, i felt like i needed my own place because i had lots of stuff (or really, just the right amount of stuff) and that i needed a larger space to contain it properly. i really felt like my first apartment was that place. then i accumulated more stuff. and then i inherited my husband's stuff. and then i started buying stuff to make my home homier while still respecting my husband's sense of style (or lack thereof) that i wasn't really in love with. and then i started dealing with my emotions and the lack of control i had over my life by buying more stuff. and now i feel like i live in an eternal project. not a home, but a space with constant need for attention and tweaking and cleaning and rearranging. i need to throw out more stuff. i need to shred practically every piece of mail that i am terrified to look at because i don't know if it will have a letter in it saying that the bank is coming to take our house the next day. or reminding me how much money we owe in medical bills. or other bills. yeah. my goal is to live in a place that is not what i described above.
2. i want to be zen girl. i'm not sure if this is achievable with my personality type, but i want to be zen girl. and that's not to say that i want to do yoga on my front porch every morning (although that would be AWESOME if i was that zen girl... but i know i am shooting too high if i even begin to list that as a goal...), but i want to genuinely want to help people - whether they are popular or likable, or annoying, or smart, or dumb, or weird, or anything. i want to just be positive and accept people for who they are including myself. always. or at least - mostly "always."
3. i want to not feel like physical trash all the time. not sure if this will be achieved by doctors or lifestyle changes or both but yes.
4. if i'm going to be creative, i want to just be creative already. and stop having 1000 unfinished projects.
i think that is a good start. *curtsies and exits*