(no subject)
I sit here on my bed at 1 48 in the morning unable to sleep, and so I write.
I have laid in bed fore about 2 and a half hours hoping that tonight would be the night that I would sleep.
I am eating rice becuase my pill makes my feel wierd and to make that weirdness go away I need to eat so rice it is.
My life these days is far from what I would haoped they would be...it seems as if I have become a hobit, I spend most of my days alone doing nothing too special. Others complain about school or work that they have too much going on and they can't handle it. But God do I wish that I could complain about there being too much...right now I seem to have nothing, I don't look forward to the next day because that just means I have to find something to do with my time so the day passes by...and then I am awake all night, left to think about the dullness of my life. How I can not wait to go to school in January...that is if I get accepted.
This was not how things were supposed to go...but my life lately never seems to go as planned. I don't even get the gradafication of having a job and making some money...which I was supposed to be doing during my time off. But so far no one wants me...well there was a few but then once I taold them I could only work until January they didn't anymore.
God my life is a reck, I want to get started on living but it seems to be taking so long. The days are passing by and I still have nothing it feels like I am fading away going unnoticed until no one does notice anymore. I don't want my life to just pass me by as I sit and watch it...but theres not much more I can do but wait...wait for my chance.
I have laid in bed fore about 2 and a half hours hoping that tonight would be the night that I would sleep.
I am eating rice becuase my pill makes my feel wierd and to make that weirdness go away I need to eat so rice it is.
My life these days is far from what I would haoped they would be...it seems as if I have become a hobit, I spend most of my days alone doing nothing too special. Others complain about school or work that they have too much going on and they can't handle it. But God do I wish that I could complain about there being too much...right now I seem to have nothing, I don't look forward to the next day because that just means I have to find something to do with my time so the day passes by...and then I am awake all night, left to think about the dullness of my life. How I can not wait to go to school in January...that is if I get accepted.
This was not how things were supposed to go...but my life lately never seems to go as planned. I don't even get the gradafication of having a job and making some money...which I was supposed to be doing during my time off. But so far no one wants me...well there was a few but then once I taold them I could only work until January they didn't anymore.
God my life is a reck, I want to get started on living but it seems to be taking so long. The days are passing by and I still have nothing it feels like I am fading away going unnoticed until no one does notice anymore. I don't want my life to just pass me by as I sit and watch it...but theres not much more I can do but wait...wait for my chance.