(no subject)
This past week and a half has been frighteningly self-destructive. I'm begining to wonder whether my self-discipline is in fact killing itself. Isn't that the reverse of how it's supposed to work? What does that mean for me post-college? I'm terrified of the endless downward spiral and what that might mean if I reach its event horizon.
To try to maintain some semblance of control and sanity I've been tightening my grip, squeezing myself harder and harder. I've only eaten one meal in the last 24 hours and in the last 4 days I haven't even gotten 8 cumulative hours of sleep. I hope I can stay healthy long enough to make it to Spain in one piece on Monday. I also missed the graduation of my contemporaries today (including both of my roommates)... that was sad.
I could sleep for a week.
To try to maintain some semblance of control and sanity I've been tightening my grip, squeezing myself harder and harder. I've only eaten one meal in the last 24 hours and in the last 4 days I haven't even gotten 8 cumulative hours of sleep. I hope I can stay healthy long enough to make it to Spain in one piece on Monday. I also missed the graduation of my contemporaries today (including both of my roommates)... that was sad.
I could sleep for a week.