I give up.
I'm exhausted. I'm exhausted from the constant storm of unappreciation. There's a reason God, or Fate, or whomever you chose to believe in, makes you go through pain. Well, that's presumptuous. My spin on it? It's so, when the light comes, you can see it that much brighter. I feel bad for people who have to deal with harsh break ups, especially those centered around lies and cheating whorefaces. And yet...when something comes along, however small, and there's not even a little bit of appreciation for it? All that says to me is you don't want to get better. You're perfectly content to wollow and stir in your own sadness. Which is your choice. I'd like to think I'm a good friend, but I'm also easily thwarted away from giving my help easily. If you don't want help, just let me know. I'll stop. I'll let you sit there. I'll let you rot. I'll let you hit rock bottom on your own and climb your way out. For some people, and I think especially you, you need to do that. People holding you up with soothing hands only prolongs your angst (something I don't use in an insulting fashion, I assure you) and makes you blind to the goodness that is three girls half naked in your house wrestling eachother. I'm sorry if it makes it a little harder to feel bad for someone when they don't see the light in that.
Yea, I'm upset. Yea, I'm annoyed. "But Josh, simple acts of exposed flesh isn't going to reconsile a broken heart." Of course not. Well, for some. But when such things make you laugh like your lungs are going to pop...it's helping. I don't care who the fuck you are or how bad you have it, it's helping. Just appreciate it. Enjoy it. Thank God, thank Fate, thank something that you were given something at all.
My last "break up" wasn't bad, so I'm lucky. Sure. But I've never loved anyone. It sucks ass when that love is turned to ash and perverted with someone elses sex. But it was still love. I'd give any-fucking-thing to feel it and have the feeling returned. So, yea, my upset comes from bitterness and childishness. But fuck that. And fuck whoever shakes their head. Want to hear a cliche? No? Good. "It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." You know why cliches are what they are? There's a science to them, a kernel of truth.
I hope your heart mends. I do. But I don't think I have the energy to try and stitch it anymore.
Yea, I'm upset. Yea, I'm annoyed. "But Josh, simple acts of exposed flesh isn't going to reconsile a broken heart." Of course not. Well, for some. But when such things make you laugh like your lungs are going to pop...it's helping. I don't care who the fuck you are or how bad you have it, it's helping. Just appreciate it. Enjoy it. Thank God, thank Fate, thank something that you were given something at all.
My last "break up" wasn't bad, so I'm lucky. Sure. But I've never loved anyone. It sucks ass when that love is turned to ash and perverted with someone elses sex. But it was still love. I'd give any-fucking-thing to feel it and have the feeling returned. So, yea, my upset comes from bitterness and childishness. But fuck that. And fuck whoever shakes their head. Want to hear a cliche? No? Good. "It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." You know why cliches are what they are? There's a science to them, a kernel of truth.
I hope your heart mends. I do. But I don't think I have the energy to try and stitch it anymore.