[FIC] Coming Out
Title: Coming Out [1/2]
Author: Uma_fics
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG13
Pairing: JaeChun
Summary: JaeJoong, living in a society where homosexuality is looked down upon, struggles with feelings of love for one of his band-mates. This is a two-shot where JaeJoong and Yoochun explore and discuss homosexuality and build the courage to come out to the rest of the group.
Skillful fingers gracefully moved their way across white and black keys, filling the room with a slow, heartwarming melody. The young singer sat, transfixed at the way JaeJoong's eyes glimmered with joy as he immersed himself in the music. The gentle smile playing along JaeJoong's lips was contagious as Yoochun found himself smiling along with him as he reached the end of the song.
As the last note sounded, JaeJoong placed his hands in his lap, looking towards his best friend, "What do you think?"
Yoochun nodded at his friend, "Perfect."
JaeJoong sighed, "You always say that."
"It's because it's always perfect," Yoochun grinned. He watched JaeJoong rearrange his papers and found himself to be frowning, "Your music seems sad lately."
Eyes averted Yoochun's at the comment, JaeJoong biting on his bottom lip nervously. Yoochun knew him well enough to know exactly what that meant. He was struggling with something, and he was trying to hide it. Yoochun rolled his chair closer to JaeJoong's, leaning in to say in a whisper, "You know better than to hide things from me."
"Aish, Chun!" JaeJoong exclaimed, backing away from him, "This isn't something I can just talk about."
"So there is something," Yoochun stated, staring at him.
"Do I have to tell you everything?" JaeJoong sighed, getting up from his chair, "I'm fine, Yoochun."
Yoochun stared after his soul-mate as he gathered his papers and stormed out of their in-home recording room. That man had an unbelievable temper sometimes. Yoochun moved over to JaeJoong's desk, flipping through the lyrics that he had been working on for the melody. They frequently worked together when creating music, knowing each others strengths and weaknesses with composing and lyric writing helped to balance them out.
His eyebrows furrowed together in worry as he pulled a song that had been tucked away under a mess of papers. The lyrics concerned him.
*
Over the next several weeks, Yoochun kept a keen eye on his band-mate, looking for any signs of him cracking. JaeJoong, when hiding his emotions, would usually try to keep them a secret until he absolutely became unable to. He really wished that rather than waiting, JaeJoong would just come to him. He usually did, unless it was something that he truly believed to be something that would cause him to hate him. JaeJoong was silly in the sense that he believed anything could cause Yoochun to hate him. Their bond was much too strong for that - fans had always hit it on the head of the nail when they referred to them as true soul-mates.
He watched as JaeJoong plastered on a happy smile in front of the members, and cried while playing sad melodies late at night. Yoochun would try to get him to talk on those nights, just sitting beside him as he cried. JaeJoong would always say nothing, though. He would just continue to play his music, occasionally resting his head on Yoochun's shoulder for some sort of comfort.
It wasn't until nearly a month and a half into this routine until Yoochun had figured it out. Or at least, he thought he had. It happened by chance, that he saw, or rather, thought he saw JaeJoong look at him while they were changing. They changed together frequently, even showering together at times, but this time it seemed different. It was almost as though he was trying to figure something out. And it clicked.
He waited until evening to talk to JaeJoong alone. Yunho, Changmin, and Junsu had gone out to eat with Eunhyuk and Leeteuk and weren't expected back for several hours, giving Yoochun plenty of time to carefully touch on the subject that he wanted to bring up with JaeJoong. For the first time with Jae, he was actually nervous to talk to him. Scared of how JaeJoong might react. He figured that it was nothing compared to how JaeJoong was felling, though.
"Boo," Yoochun knocked on the door-frame of the bedroom that the two of them shared with Junsu. JaeJoong looked up from the bed where he was sitting, his cell phone turning in his hands, "Can we talk?"
JaeJoong nodded, adjusting himself on the bed so that he could cross his legs as Yoochun moved to sit beside him. Yoochun wasn't sure how to approach it, but feared if he was too blunt that it would set JaeJoong off.
"You've been upset lately," Yoochun said softly, hand reaching out to entangle their fingers together. JaeJoong wouldn't look at him.
"JaeJoong," Yoochun said, "Look at me."
JaeJoong refused, shaking his head no. Yoochun felt JaeJoong's fingers tighten around Yoochun's hand, as if begging for him to just stop.
"JaeJoong, I'm going to be honest, ok?" Yoochun sighed, "Can I be honest?"
JaeJoong nodded nervously, eyes slowly making their way to meet with Yoochun's.
"Are you gay?" Yoochun mentally slapped himself for how blunt and awful that sounded, but he really had no other way of saying it. How else are you supposed to ask your best friend if they're interested in men?
JaeJoong didn't say a word, but the tears and heavy sobs that began to wrack his body answered any further questions that Yoochun may have had. JaeJoong was gay. That's what he had been hiding.
Hesitantly, Yoochun pressed his lips to JaeJoong's, bringing the older man into a warm hug. JaeJoong froze, not pushing Yoochun away, but not really returning the gesture either. Yoochun broke their kiss, looking at him with questioning eyes, "Is this what's bothering you?"
"Are you gay, Yoochun?" JaeJoong whispered, wrapping his own arms around Yoochun once again looking for comfort.
"I just kissed you, didn't I?" Yoochun smiled, "Can I do it again?"
JaeJoong's lips were on his hard, without further question. Yoochun closed his eyes, allowing himself to feel JaeJoong. JaeJoong shouldn't have kept this to himself, and he really shouldn't have been so slow to figure it out. But for now, they'd worry about that later.
Inspired by
Author: Uma_fics
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG13
Pairing: JaeChun
Summary: JaeJoong, living in a society where homosexuality is looked down upon, struggles with feelings of love for one of his band-mates. This is a two-shot where JaeJoong and Yoochun explore and discuss homosexuality and build the courage to come out to the rest of the group.
Skillful fingers gracefully moved their way across white and black keys, filling the room with a slow, heartwarming melody. The young singer sat, transfixed at the way JaeJoong's eyes glimmered with joy as he immersed himself in the music. The gentle smile playing along JaeJoong's lips was contagious as Yoochun found himself smiling along with him as he reached the end of the song.
As the last note sounded, JaeJoong placed his hands in his lap, looking towards his best friend, "What do you think?"
Yoochun nodded at his friend, "Perfect."
JaeJoong sighed, "You always say that."
"It's because it's always perfect," Yoochun grinned. He watched JaeJoong rearrange his papers and found himself to be frowning, "Your music seems sad lately."
Eyes averted Yoochun's at the comment, JaeJoong biting on his bottom lip nervously. Yoochun knew him well enough to know exactly what that meant. He was struggling with something, and he was trying to hide it. Yoochun rolled his chair closer to JaeJoong's, leaning in to say in a whisper, "You know better than to hide things from me."
"Aish, Chun!" JaeJoong exclaimed, backing away from him, "This isn't something I can just talk about."
"So there is something," Yoochun stated, staring at him.
"Do I have to tell you everything?" JaeJoong sighed, getting up from his chair, "I'm fine, Yoochun."
Yoochun stared after his soul-mate as he gathered his papers and stormed out of their in-home recording room. That man had an unbelievable temper sometimes. Yoochun moved over to JaeJoong's desk, flipping through the lyrics that he had been working on for the melody. They frequently worked together when creating music, knowing each others strengths and weaknesses with composing and lyric writing helped to balance them out.
His eyebrows furrowed together in worry as he pulled a song that had been tucked away under a mess of papers. The lyrics concerned him.
*
Over the next several weeks, Yoochun kept a keen eye on his band-mate, looking for any signs of him cracking. JaeJoong, when hiding his emotions, would usually try to keep them a secret until he absolutely became unable to. He really wished that rather than waiting, JaeJoong would just come to him. He usually did, unless it was something that he truly believed to be something that would cause him to hate him. JaeJoong was silly in the sense that he believed anything could cause Yoochun to hate him. Their bond was much too strong for that - fans had always hit it on the head of the nail when they referred to them as true soul-mates.
He watched as JaeJoong plastered on a happy smile in front of the members, and cried while playing sad melodies late at night. Yoochun would try to get him to talk on those nights, just sitting beside him as he cried. JaeJoong would always say nothing, though. He would just continue to play his music, occasionally resting his head on Yoochun's shoulder for some sort of comfort.
It wasn't until nearly a month and a half into this routine until Yoochun had figured it out. Or at least, he thought he had. It happened by chance, that he saw, or rather, thought he saw JaeJoong look at him while they were changing. They changed together frequently, even showering together at times, but this time it seemed different. It was almost as though he was trying to figure something out. And it clicked.
He waited until evening to talk to JaeJoong alone. Yunho, Changmin, and Junsu had gone out to eat with Eunhyuk and Leeteuk and weren't expected back for several hours, giving Yoochun plenty of time to carefully touch on the subject that he wanted to bring up with JaeJoong. For the first time with Jae, he was actually nervous to talk to him. Scared of how JaeJoong might react. He figured that it was nothing compared to how JaeJoong was felling, though.
"Boo," Yoochun knocked on the door-frame of the bedroom that the two of them shared with Junsu. JaeJoong looked up from the bed where he was sitting, his cell phone turning in his hands, "Can we talk?"
JaeJoong nodded, adjusting himself on the bed so that he could cross his legs as Yoochun moved to sit beside him. Yoochun wasn't sure how to approach it, but feared if he was too blunt that it would set JaeJoong off.
"You've been upset lately," Yoochun said softly, hand reaching out to entangle their fingers together. JaeJoong wouldn't look at him.
"JaeJoong," Yoochun said, "Look at me."
JaeJoong refused, shaking his head no. Yoochun felt JaeJoong's fingers tighten around Yoochun's hand, as if begging for him to just stop.
"JaeJoong, I'm going to be honest, ok?" Yoochun sighed, "Can I be honest?"
JaeJoong nodded nervously, eyes slowly making their way to meet with Yoochun's.
"Are you gay?" Yoochun mentally slapped himself for how blunt and awful that sounded, but he really had no other way of saying it. How else are you supposed to ask your best friend if they're interested in men?
JaeJoong didn't say a word, but the tears and heavy sobs that began to wrack his body answered any further questions that Yoochun may have had. JaeJoong was gay. That's what he had been hiding.
Hesitantly, Yoochun pressed his lips to JaeJoong's, bringing the older man into a warm hug. JaeJoong froze, not pushing Yoochun away, but not really returning the gesture either. Yoochun broke their kiss, looking at him with questioning eyes, "Is this what's bothering you?"
"Are you gay, Yoochun?" JaeJoong whispered, wrapping his own arms around Yoochun once again looking for comfort.
"I just kissed you, didn't I?" Yoochun smiled, "Can I do it again?"
JaeJoong's lips were on his hard, without further question. Yoochun closed his eyes, allowing himself to feel JaeJoong. JaeJoong shouldn't have kept this to himself, and he really shouldn't have been so slow to figure it out. But for now, they'd worry about that later.
Inspired by
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