» Goddamn the title is too long. It's actually "The lives of two rather unambitious office workers; one Prussian, one English." Office!AU. Written for my beautiful darling
sonofon for Christmas. Merry Christmas darling!
» One-shot
» Prussia ; England ; Others ; Prussia/England
» PG-13
They work on the fiftieth floor of the largest office complex downtown, pretending to file accounts and photocopy documents but in actual fact not doing a whole lot.
Gilbert works next to the window, his little personal space filled with pictures of German landscapes and beer and Prussian military (Arthur's tried to tell him that there's no way he can be Prussian; he's German, but Gilbert's never listened) and even a few little snapshots of baby chicks, wrinkled from much handling.
Arthur works facing him, his half of the divider smothered in photos of punk rock bands, song lyrics and cross sections of ships, neatly labelled with the different types of sails and decks. (Gilbert thought the poop deck was the funniest thing he had ever heard. That was before Arthur had clobbered him over the head with a rolled up newspaper.
“Unsophisticated German twat.”)
Every day, the Ukrainian secretary comes from the office below to nervously hand them their files for the day (Gilbert doesn't know why she's so nervous, they might be the scourge of the building but they're not that bad) and then disappears again to make sandwiches for the other workers, including the lovely man from Canada who always seems to be left out of the Christmas card list. Gilbert watches as she goes, admiring her lovely figure (small waist, big tits, what more could you want?) and thinks for the hundredth time that perhaps it's time he stopped spending his weekends at nightclubs and instead finding himself a nice quiet girl to settle down with. Like that Hungarian girl he saw at Roderich's piano concert once. She had a nice body and her hair was long, just like the girls he used to see in his porn magazines.
Arthur tells him it's a pointless effort (since when could he read minds?) and that's that. The idea disappears from his head for another day.
Arthur himself has a girl he'd like to settle down with. Her name is Michelle and she was rather nice to him and everything could have worked out so lovely if only she hadn't run off with Arthur's old college roommate about seven years ago. He was French too - that made things all worse.
Gilbert thinks Arthur dwells too much on the past and that he needs to lighten up and let them go. Arthur thinks Gilbert sticks his nose into other people's business far too much and that he has no sense of decency.
One day Arthur mentions that his cousin Alfred (“a loud, greedy American!” he had muttered scornfully), was coming over and that meant he would not get a proper night's sleep for about a month. He also managed to word this in a way that sounded suspiciously like he was asking Gilbert to take over his share of the work so that he could catch some shuteye.
Gilbert promptly told him to fuck off and pull his own fair share.
Once things have been done for the day and the pair have sufficiently managed to cover their own tracks from the wrath of their boss (why are Chinese businessmen so work orientated? It's a question Gilbert has never found the answer to), they pack their things and leave at the exact same time. It's a routine they've grown into, and no one can quite explain how or why, but perhaps it's like how when a girl decides she needs to visit a washroom and the entire female congregation promptly gets up to accompany her.
They walk down the fifty flights of stairs together (Berwald never did manage to get round to getting that damned elevator fixed), wave goodbye to Kiku and Antonio, avoid the creepy Russian on the 3rd floor, and exit the building at exactly 5:30pm. Arthur flags down a taxi (he'd never passed the driver's test), while Gilbert heads round the back to fetch his old battered jeep. As the taxi driver pulls away, Arthur peers through the window and nods his head in a gruff version of a goodbye.
They do this for twenty years, and perhaps it's the best twenty years of their lives.
» This is weird I know.