And how could I not deny the existence of guilt? I know we all do wrong things, but I was very selfish, to the point of cold blooded cruelty, and now I do not want to admit that it cannot be ever justified. Where is the heartlessness when you need it?
I did it because Morgoth would probably get to Fingon if I delay him enough. Even the young idiot I was could not miss that. And I know I tried to kill him, but I didn't. I couldn't, in the end.
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Oh, sorry. Should I go?
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Nah. I've just been shopping, I'm off the brooding game for a while. I am, however, a good listener should you choose to share your woes.
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...
Can you tell me how to deal with emotions you do not want?
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The first way is always repressing them. Which is temporary at best, and leads to ulcers.
Then you can accept them as a part of yourself. They may bring you sadness, but it's better than denying their existence.
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And how could I not deny the existence of guilt? I know we all do wrong things, but I was very selfish, to the point of cold blooded cruelty, and now I do not want to admit that it cannot be ever justified. Where is the heartlessness when you need it?
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*quietly* Sometimes heartlessness just doesn't cut it. Sometimes things touch us too deeply.
Care to tell me what it was?
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*looks at his hands*
I did it because Morgoth would probably get to Fingon if I delay him enough. Even the young idiot I was could not miss that. And I know I tried to kill him, but I didn't. I couldn't, in the end.
Maglor was very good with his weapons.
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You loved - you love Maedhros?
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Yes. And now you are the only one who knows.
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I see nothing but sadness in this. His love for Fingon... the legends it built...
But I know where you're coming from.
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...do you?
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