Was it all a stupid mistake?
As I sit and stare out the window, alone, listening to Dire Straits and sipping my cup of Redbush tea, I dwell on how all the things that matter seem to have gone from life. I look around my room and see the text books, folders, solar-powered flower I bought to use with year 7's, and I realise this is all my life has become.
I look out the window and contemplate whether if I fell out and was unable to complete the rest of the PGCE they would give it to me anyway as he majority is done and I realise they would still make me write the essay and it makes me depressed.
I reflect on the days of work, yeah generally work itself was pants but I miss the people, talking to people, going for drinks after work and sharing experiences and the bonding that this lead to.
I dwell on the fact that I have so few friends that I just seem to see the same ones over and over again and have no-one to invite to the wedding. I think about some of my friends who I have not seen for years, who can't be bothered to make an effort to meet up and when we suggest times can't be bothered to remember or something better comes up. Is the life of a teacher this lonely empty place, because it is I don't want it.
I want to go for walks, swimming, ride my bike and generally enjoy life again and right now I feel dead and empty like there is no joy left in the world. Has the course done this to me? How can it have changed the person I am so much in a year?
Did I make a mistake? :(
I look out the window and contemplate whether if I fell out and was unable to complete the rest of the PGCE they would give it to me anyway as he majority is done and I realise they would still make me write the essay and it makes me depressed.
I reflect on the days of work, yeah generally work itself was pants but I miss the people, talking to people, going for drinks after work and sharing experiences and the bonding that this lead to.
I dwell on the fact that I have so few friends that I just seem to see the same ones over and over again and have no-one to invite to the wedding. I think about some of my friends who I have not seen for years, who can't be bothered to make an effort to meet up and when we suggest times can't be bothered to remember or something better comes up. Is the life of a teacher this lonely empty place, because it is I don't want it.
I want to go for walks, swimming, ride my bike and generally enjoy life again and right now I feel dead and empty like there is no joy left in the world. Has the course done this to me? How can it have changed the person I am so much in a year?
Did I make a mistake? :(