In which I emulated a stereotypical tech support bod

[uk_sef]

One of the dancers who turned up almost on time to the free social event (as opposed to the majority who are generally late!) complained that the water out of the water machine wasn't cold. Somehow this was magically supposed to be my responsibility - even though I don't supply or prepare the machine and have never even drunk from it. I guess some

Comments

[uk_sef]

Apparently it's not just IT and I really am expected to fix everything for everyone. Last week's "crises" included:

- A plaintive cry of "Someone has slimed my machine!" from one of the teachers. The bright yellow slime looked to me like a brand of washing-up liquid. Careful application of a damp tissue (from my supply of tissues and personal drinking water bottle) confirmed the detergent diagnosis. I was then able to remove the "slime" (very carefully because it was an electrical device!) so that the teacher was willing to touch the machine again.

- "Do you have another of those for my nose?" - referring to my cleaning of the kit with paper tissues. The teacher had managed to come out without any hanky of his own (although he had a waistcoat etc and was sporting a deer-stalker hat!) and needed me to fix his face next. Fortunately, I carry a large supply with me. I also have the makings of a mini first-aid kit with which I'd patched up one of his students, who had arrived at the class already bleeding from some incident or other just beforehand, a couple of weeks ago.

- The mystery of the missing amplifier (ie the "someone has stolen my amplifier" complaint alongside the sliming incident). I couldn't solve that in the sense of magicking up another amplifier for him; but I do have a pretty good idea who the likely culprits were, since they were raiding another cupboard for kit earlier that evening at a different class. In which case it will hopefully be back in place for next week.

- "I can't use my iPod on this and my CD jumps on it". Again it wasn't possible to magic up the correct connections for an iPod in the absence of the amplifier which normally bears them; but I did happen to have a replacement CD on me, with adequate tracks for his purposes. Although he seemed to be getting along without needing it by the time I left.

- "I can't get home. I've forgotten to bring a phone or any money with me!" (from someone else at the next venue). I had both of these things to lend them - and they chose the phone-a-friend option (although I still had to point out that they wouldn't get reception in the core of the building and would have to go out to the lobby and wave it about a bit).

I do wonder about just how hopelessly helpless these allegedly independent adult humans are. :-/

[wolfy_writing]

Humans definitely tend to be on the needy side, and are always ready to take advantage of the assistance of any intelligent life in the vicinity.

[uk_sef]

So, in the absence of being able to significantly alter everyone else, my corrective options are:
1. Avoid the vicinity of humans (which I do do quite a lot anyway!).
2. Appear (or become): (a) less intelligent or (b) less alive.

Option 2 is definitely the trickier of those. Although there's a general tendency towards (b) for all life eventually.

[wolfy_writing]

Yeah, I'd give it about a century and then go for option b.