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haha i'm using this! it's safer than tumblr it seems. new years came and went. i had a fun time in the compound with mallory and everyone. definitely comfortable in my "stand alone" complex that i've grown accustomed to. mal's been here for a week and a half and i've had an amazing time with her. she's done so much for me and helped me work on my apartment more. i don't think i could ever find someone as amazing as she is to me. but i've started a new job since i lost my job at coach. the pay is awesome, the work is hard and i feel like i've actually done something every day when i leave. i went home for 2 weeks after coach let me go (ironically when i mentioned "good karma" in my previous post is when i got the phone call) and saw mal and my friends. definitely reminded me why i left in the first place. but christmas was sort of a bummer, i hung out by myself the entire time i was home. things are starting to come together, i've just got to get back in the swing of things when it comes to the dizzle. whatever happens will happen right? i've realized some people are weak hearted and cowards and i've distanced myself. this week i am going to start going to the gym with ham and working on my hands. i've been talking about it since me and sasha broke up 3 1/2 years ago and we fucked around in the hall a few weeks ago and i really enjoyed it. i'm the smallest one out of everyone i know and in the street i need that confidence you know? a knife will work but i need to know that i can definitely put someone out with my hands! MB tattooed my butt and my feet. i really appreciate how much he has helped me, even if it seems so menial to everyone, i seriously cannot thank him enough for how hard he has looked out. i'd like to thank everyone that's helped me along they way, whether it was a hard lesson to learn or one that came with smiles and daps, i appreciate it all. jax is my home for most of 2012 until i find myself back in NC. i'm going to make it work with mallory, she's the one for me.