hmmmm
Life is kinda funny sometimes. i don't raelly know why, i guess. things don't always work out how they are supposed to, and that goes double for me. i don't know weather to die or keep living...sometimes it feels like both suck. my luck with the ladies, is absolutly terrible, and thats not me just being pestimistic. yuo can ask anyone, that knows me, that i have been having terrible luck. friends are there, most of the time. i mean we all got shit to do, last thing they need is to make my lousy ass, feel better. we're all just getting older, got our own stuff to do. lately i have been feeling better (better as in depressed less) although last week i was pretty bad...but that was my own thing. and i actually feel more cheerful, so i guess that makes me better.i actually got in touch with jess, and she seems pretty good, that makes me glad. since we seperated, i have been trying to date, or trying to hook up with some girls. and i am still alone, and although i don't have an exact count of how many girls i asked on dates, it has been quite a few. some of them we kind enough to go on a date, others weren't. heh, some actually said yes and ended up getting a boyfriend, right before our date...thats just shitty. that actually happend twice...with two seperate girls. one was one day before our date. and one was...hmmmm, oh yeah...3 hours before our date. ah well, you win some ya lose some...in my case its more of a lose-lose situation, but i've become so used to being disapointed by some chick that, i think i don't really care what happends anymore. i actually expect the worst. but its ok, i guess, i mean i gotta live with it, and there isn't anything i can do to change it, so whatever. well thats enough of this, its late, and although i worked late, i am not tired, even though i awnt to be. night.