Comtemplating...
I'm betting that not too many people read what I throw up
here. If I'm wrong, then great. If I'm right, then maybe these thoughts are
just meant for me. Thinking is what I spend most of my time doing. When I
drive, I think. When I work, I think. When I sleep, I dream, wake up, and think
about it. And I don't just mean those random thoughts that come through a
person's head. I mean the thoughts that some might call "deep" or
give you a strange look for if you bring up in conversation. What I'm thinking
about now is relationships. In every relationship you have with a human being,
there are a few things that you can be assured of:
1) Emotion - There is no way you can subdue emotions completely. They come up in anger, rage, anxiety, fear, stress, depression, and so many more. Even the "good" emotions (happiness, peace, love, etc.) in relationships are temporary.
2) Flaws - No one is perfect. I don't care how great that special someone is or how perfect he/she seems. No one is perfect. Regardless of intention or desire, people let others down at one point or another.
3) Pain - Be it physical or emotional, the emotions and flaws found in people often make relationships painful. Expectations not met leave room only for pain and regret.
Although these 3 guarantees may seem cynical, I've never seen a relationship between any two people that have not included these in some capacity. Take note of the relationships each person, especially yourself, goes through in life. We function, we thrive, we live around and through the presence of others. Loneliness drives an individual to enter into relationships. That being said, we cannot escape or avoid relationships in one way or another. Therefore, emotions, flaws, and pain are inevitable.
But, what if we found ourselves in a relationship that defied these three points? What if we were in a relationship where the other party never got angry, fearful, stressed out, depressed, or emotional? What if there were no flaws in that other person? What if everything that other person did was right? What if that person never caused you pain? What if that other person was...perfect?
You see, I have such a relationship, and I don't know how to act. There is someone with whom I have a relationship that never takes me somewhere I don't want to go. I never hurt, I don't deal with flaws, or emotions, or pain because of this relationship. My flaws exist, my emotions often flourish, and I cause pain. However, none of those are returned. I deal out pain and flaw, and in return I get grace and peace. For my hurt inflicted, I receive forgiveness. Only one person has ever offered this to me, and I leave Him out of my life so often.
Jesus Christ, my Savior, my Friend, is that perfect person. He never leads me astray. He never hurts me. He is flawless and perfect. He gives me what I've been searching for in all the wrong places. Yet I still search elsewhere for what only He freely gives.
...Jesus, I want to walk with you more closely. I want to sit at your feet and wait. I want to learn to be what I can't from the only one who can. Teach me to be all the things that attract me to you. Be evident to and through me. Be close to me. I'm searching for you now. I will come near to you, so please come near to me. Even though I'm imperfect, I love you.
1) Emotion - There is no way you can subdue emotions completely. They come up in anger, rage, anxiety, fear, stress, depression, and so many more. Even the "good" emotions (happiness, peace, love, etc.) in relationships are temporary.
2) Flaws - No one is perfect. I don't care how great that special someone is or how perfect he/she seems. No one is perfect. Regardless of intention or desire, people let others down at one point or another.
3) Pain - Be it physical or emotional, the emotions and flaws found in people often make relationships painful. Expectations not met leave room only for pain and regret.
Although these 3 guarantees may seem cynical, I've never seen a relationship between any two people that have not included these in some capacity. Take note of the relationships each person, especially yourself, goes through in life. We function, we thrive, we live around and through the presence of others. Loneliness drives an individual to enter into relationships. That being said, we cannot escape or avoid relationships in one way or another. Therefore, emotions, flaws, and pain are inevitable.
But, what if we found ourselves in a relationship that defied these three points? What if we were in a relationship where the other party never got angry, fearful, stressed out, depressed, or emotional? What if there were no flaws in that other person? What if everything that other person did was right? What if that person never caused you pain? What if that other person was...perfect?
You see, I have such a relationship, and I don't know how to act. There is someone with whom I have a relationship that never takes me somewhere I don't want to go. I never hurt, I don't deal with flaws, or emotions, or pain because of this relationship. My flaws exist, my emotions often flourish, and I cause pain. However, none of those are returned. I deal out pain and flaw, and in return I get grace and peace. For my hurt inflicted, I receive forgiveness. Only one person has ever offered this to me, and I leave Him out of my life so often.
Jesus Christ, my Savior, my Friend, is that perfect person. He never leads me astray. He never hurts me. He is flawless and perfect. He gives me what I've been searching for in all the wrong places. Yet I still search elsewhere for what only He freely gives.
...Jesus, I want to walk with you more closely. I want to sit at your feet and wait. I want to learn to be what I can't from the only one who can. Teach me to be all the things that attract me to you. Be evident to and through me. Be close to me. I'm searching for you now. I will come near to you, so please come near to me. Even though I'm imperfect, I love you.