Done
Mike and I finished the last of it last night. It was a decent night, nothing spectacular. Got Spirited Away and some munchies from Ralph's. Smoked out in my room with some Pink Floyd and such. Watched the movie, hung out with some sober chicks who came downstairs for awhile, and then went to sleep. Spirited Away or another anime would be fun to watch during the marathon, except without all the distracting noises around. I'm glad I'm done. It was definitely getting to be too much for me. Not that I couldn't handle it, just that it wasn't as enjoyable anymore, which is a sign that I needed to stop.
I just don't get as excited about it anymore, too many things annoy me too easily and they all just combine for not so great trips. I don't want that to happen to a good thing. Plus, I realized last night that I kinda transform into a different person when I'm high. I was trying to put words to it last night when I had this revelation, but I was far too retarded to do so. I was trying to imagine what I'd be doing right then if I wasn't high, and just chillin or drinking or something. It was so hard for me to comprehend, but I realized that I definitely would not be just sitting there listening to music and nearly falling off my chair because I was slumping into it so much. Mike and I would be talking about stuff that happened recently or people or things we need to do or something. It was fucking 10pm and we were hardcore diggin in to our munchies after eating dinner no more than 3 or 4 hours ago. I realized that being high makes me so socially retarded, and that's probably one of the bigger reasons I'm quitting as well. I don't like not being able to act normal, fun, and sociable. Especially in situations like last night where there were people there I didn't know and that's their first impression of me. Being high makes me too much not like me. I think I understand a lot better why Sarah doesn't like me when I'm high. I probably wouldn't like me either. So I guess that's that then.
I just don't get as excited about it anymore, too many things annoy me too easily and they all just combine for not so great trips. I don't want that to happen to a good thing. Plus, I realized last night that I kinda transform into a different person when I'm high. I was trying to put words to it last night when I had this revelation, but I was far too retarded to do so. I was trying to imagine what I'd be doing right then if I wasn't high, and just chillin or drinking or something. It was so hard for me to comprehend, but I realized that I definitely would not be just sitting there listening to music and nearly falling off my chair because I was slumping into it so much. Mike and I would be talking about stuff that happened recently or people or things we need to do or something. It was fucking 10pm and we were hardcore diggin in to our munchies after eating dinner no more than 3 or 4 hours ago. I realized that being high makes me so socially retarded, and that's probably one of the bigger reasons I'm quitting as well. I don't like not being able to act normal, fun, and sociable. Especially in situations like last night where there were people there I didn't know and that's their first impression of me. Being high makes me too much not like me. I think I understand a lot better why Sarah doesn't like me when I'm high. I probably wouldn't like me either. So I guess that's that then.