(no subject)
From: ubercub
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 7:50 AM
To: ubercub's supervisor
Subject: Possible leave request
Hi Mary,
I don’t like to do this sort of thing, but Robert is trying to get an appointment today with a specialist, his knee and ankle has been bothering him badly since he tripped and fell while walking outside a couple days ago. He was supposed to drive to Houston last night to visit his family but had to turn around because it hurt so badly and he was unable to make the drive in that condition. If he gets in today to see a doctor, I would have to take him to the appointment because I have the car and he is unable to drive my standard transmission truck…would it be possible for me to maybe use annual leave to take the time off to take him to his doctor appointment? I don’t even know if he will be able to get one, but hopefully someone will be able to see him, because he is in a lot of pain and something is obviously wrong with his knee.
From: ubercub's supervisor
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 8:16 AM
To: ubercub
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
David,
Not approved.
From: ubercub
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 8:21 AM
To: ubercub's supervisor
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
Just curious, what would be the policy for this type of situation for taking leave to drive a married spouse to a doctor appointment?
From: ubercub's supervisor
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 8:37 AM
To: ubercub
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
Married spouse is a family member and sick leave can be used. Chapter 5 of HR manual has information for sick leave for family member. You can access this policy through AccessHR. However, I am not clear if you are talking about your situation or policy applicable to married spouse in general? Let me know if you have any question.
Thanks
From: ubercub
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 9:06 AM
To: ubercub's supervisor
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
I was curious about the policy in general and also in relation to my situation. I don't usually come out and say it because I am generally a quiet and introverted person, but Robert and I have been together, partners, for over seven years now, although we can't get legally married due to the laws of the State of Texas. If we could have we would have been married in the eyes of the state years ago. I understand that because of our inability to get married we do not fit under the HR manual policy, so it doesn't technically apply to us. That is why I asked if I could use annual leave instead of sick leave. I don't really care about what sort of leave time I use...to me, all I know is that my loved one is injured and in pain and needs to see a doctor. I realize this puts you in what is probably a somewhat awkward situation; I'm sorry, and I'm not trying to break rules or anything. It just seems to me that sometimes in my situation it is easy to fall between the cracks of how the system is set up, and I can't help but be mindful of how, in a different situation, if we were say, a husband and wife, there would be no question of whether or not I could take my loved one to receive medical attention, if they were able to get an appointment for that day.
I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to put you on the spot. I don't even know if you were aware that Robert and I were together, not just roommates or friends. I don't even know if he's been able to get an appointment yet, but he wanted to try. I understand this is also very short notice. I guess I just wanted you to know that I wasn’t just trying to get out early on a Friday with some flakey excuse. I'll respect your decision and position for this matter.
At this point about 45 minutes passed and then my supervisor called me into her office. She told me that she spoke with her supervisor and they were willing to work with me and asked for more information about Rob's appointment that day. I told them that he was still trying to set one up, and she told me to just let them know if he is able to make an appointment. A few minutes later I sent the following email:
From: ubercub
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 9:56 AM
To: ubercub's supervisor
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
Hi Mary,
Rob just sent a text message saying he could not find anything for today, but was able to get an appt. for 3:30 Monday 10/17. Unfortunately it is short notice for doctor’s offices also and most are closed on the weekend. Do you think I could maybe leave around 2:30ish or so to get him to his appointment that day? My task next week is imaging.
Thank you very much for talk with me about this, I really appreciate it.
From: ubercub's supervisor
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 9:57 AM
To: ubercub
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
OK
Guess I'm out at work now! At first I was like "Hurrr" then I was like "Wut" then I was like "OK, cool." Did I do the right thing here? Was I too in-your-face about my sexuality? Did I puss out and should have demanded more rights than the straight folks, and special privileges, like the republicans say we do?
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 7:50 AM
To: ubercub's supervisor
Subject: Possible leave request
Hi Mary,
I don’t like to do this sort of thing, but Robert is trying to get an appointment today with a specialist, his knee and ankle has been bothering him badly since he tripped and fell while walking outside a couple days ago. He was supposed to drive to Houston last night to visit his family but had to turn around because it hurt so badly and he was unable to make the drive in that condition. If he gets in today to see a doctor, I would have to take him to the appointment because I have the car and he is unable to drive my standard transmission truck…would it be possible for me to maybe use annual leave to take the time off to take him to his doctor appointment? I don’t even know if he will be able to get one, but hopefully someone will be able to see him, because he is in a lot of pain and something is obviously wrong with his knee.
From: ubercub's supervisor
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 8:16 AM
To: ubercub
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
David,
Not approved.
From: ubercub
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 8:21 AM
To: ubercub's supervisor
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
Just curious, what would be the policy for this type of situation for taking leave to drive a married spouse to a doctor appointment?
From: ubercub's supervisor
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 8:37 AM
To: ubercub
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
Married spouse is a family member and sick leave can be used. Chapter 5 of HR manual has information for sick leave for family member. You can access this policy through AccessHR. However, I am not clear if you are talking about your situation or policy applicable to married spouse in general? Let me know if you have any question.
Thanks
From: ubercub
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 9:06 AM
To: ubercub's supervisor
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
I was curious about the policy in general and also in relation to my situation. I don't usually come out and say it because I am generally a quiet and introverted person, but Robert and I have been together, partners, for over seven years now, although we can't get legally married due to the laws of the State of Texas. If we could have we would have been married in the eyes of the state years ago. I understand that because of our inability to get married we do not fit under the HR manual policy, so it doesn't technically apply to us. That is why I asked if I could use annual leave instead of sick leave. I don't really care about what sort of leave time I use...to me, all I know is that my loved one is injured and in pain and needs to see a doctor. I realize this puts you in what is probably a somewhat awkward situation; I'm sorry, and I'm not trying to break rules or anything. It just seems to me that sometimes in my situation it is easy to fall between the cracks of how the system is set up, and I can't help but be mindful of how, in a different situation, if we were say, a husband and wife, there would be no question of whether or not I could take my loved one to receive medical attention, if they were able to get an appointment for that day.
I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to put you on the spot. I don't even know if you were aware that Robert and I were together, not just roommates or friends. I don't even know if he's been able to get an appointment yet, but he wanted to try. I understand this is also very short notice. I guess I just wanted you to know that I wasn’t just trying to get out early on a Friday with some flakey excuse. I'll respect your decision and position for this matter.
At this point about 45 minutes passed and then my supervisor called me into her office. She told me that she spoke with her supervisor and they were willing to work with me and asked for more information about Rob's appointment that day. I told them that he was still trying to set one up, and she told me to just let them know if he is able to make an appointment. A few minutes later I sent the following email:
From: ubercub
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 9:56 AM
To: ubercub's supervisor
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
Hi Mary,
Rob just sent a text message saying he could not find anything for today, but was able to get an appt. for 3:30 Monday 10/17. Unfortunately it is short notice for doctor’s offices also and most are closed on the weekend. Do you think I could maybe leave around 2:30ish or so to get him to his appointment that day? My task next week is imaging.
Thank you very much for talk with me about this, I really appreciate it.
From: ubercub's supervisor
Sent: Friday, August 14, 2009 9:57 AM
To: ubercub
Subject: RE: Possible leave request
OK
Guess I'm out at work now! At first I was like "Hurrr" then I was like "Wut" then I was like "OK, cool." Did I do the right thing here? Was I too in-your-face about my sexuality? Did I puss out and should have demanded more rights than the straight folks, and special privileges, like the republicans say we do?