Dook For Thought
As I'm sitting on the crapper at work, I'm thinking about the following... really, no matter how 'clean' a bathroom is, you still risk what I like to call... cross contamination.
From an engineering standpoint, consider the process map.
1. Enter bathroom
2. If taking a number 1, continue; if taking a number 2, skip to step 12
3. Step up to urinal and whip your cock out… make sure not to bang it on the floor. Snoogins ;-)
4. Commence pissing
5. Flush (first contamination)
6. Zipper up (touching your pants/zipper with the hand that is contaminated)
7. Turn on the sink (second contamination and this spreading the first contamination + your own to the faucet)
8. Lather, rinse, repeat
9. Ok... you’re clean (except your pants unless of course you decided to wash those too). Now when you go to turn off the water, you are touching a contaminated faucet so you should really revert back to step 7, but that would be an endless loop and you’d forever spend time in the bathroom…. People would begin to talk
10. Paper towel off
11. Leave (touching the contaminated handle from people that do not wash their hands (Danito))
If dook is your game:
12. Commence waste release protocol numero dos
13. Wipe
14. Pull up, zipper, and belt pants… which contaminate pretty much everything.
15. Turn on the sink (second contamination and this spreading the first contamination + your own to the faucet)
16. Lather, rinse, repeat
17. Ok... you’re hands are clean, but you now have the smell of death and shit particles all over your Dockers.
18. Paper towel off
19. Leave (touching the contaminated handle from people that do not wash their hands (Ipy))
Just something to think about when you go back to your desk and pop an M&M into your mouth. : - )
I know you can use the ‘paper towel hand’ to operate the faucet and door and sometimes it can be done… but when there is no trash can near the exit… You’ve got dook hands my friend.
Enjoy your day. BOOOOONNNGGGGG!!!!!
From an engineering standpoint, consider the process map.
1. Enter bathroom
2. If taking a number 1, continue; if taking a number 2, skip to step 12
3. Step up to urinal and whip your cock out… make sure not to bang it on the floor. Snoogins ;-)
4. Commence pissing
5. Flush (first contamination)
6. Zipper up (touching your pants/zipper with the hand that is contaminated)
7. Turn on the sink (second contamination and this spreading the first contamination + your own to the faucet)
8. Lather, rinse, repeat
9. Ok... you’re clean (except your pants unless of course you decided to wash those too). Now when you go to turn off the water, you are touching a contaminated faucet so you should really revert back to step 7, but that would be an endless loop and you’d forever spend time in the bathroom…. People would begin to talk
10. Paper towel off
11. Leave (touching the contaminated handle from people that do not wash their hands (Danito))
If dook is your game:
12. Commence waste release protocol numero dos
13. Wipe
14. Pull up, zipper, and belt pants… which contaminate pretty much everything.
15. Turn on the sink (second contamination and this spreading the first contamination + your own to the faucet)
16. Lather, rinse, repeat
17. Ok... you’re hands are clean, but you now have the smell of death and shit particles all over your Dockers.
18. Paper towel off
19. Leave (touching the contaminated handle from people that do not wash their hands (Ipy))
Just something to think about when you go back to your desk and pop an M&M into your mouth. : - )
I know you can use the ‘paper towel hand’ to operate the faucet and door and sometimes it can be done… but when there is no trash can near the exit… You’ve got dook hands my friend.
Enjoy your day. BOOOOONNNGGGGG!!!!!