Fratres En Aeternum
So...
It's been one year since you left us.
One looooong year.
People say that you never realize what you've got until it's gone.
It's true.
You were probably one of the few people that I ever really allowed inside my walls. You were one of a handful that actually knew, and cared for, the real me... the person hiding behind the facade. I will never be able to explain it but, for some reason, I never needed, or even felt the need, to hide anything from you. In some ways, you seemed to even mirror me.
There were times when we both acted as if we took each other for granted... times when we might not see or speak to each other for months. But I knew that, if I needed you, you would be there... to talk me down... to cheer me up... hell, just a stupid one-line IM from you could brighten my day sometimes. And, in those rare moments when you needed someone, I was there. It didn't happen often but when it did I was more than happy to do it.
After all, you were a friend.
When I first heard you were gone, I actually laughed. I thought that the person telling me... well, I thought they were setting up a joke. Too soon, I realized that, this time, there was no joke. You were really gone.
Even now, a year later, it's still not really hit home.
To never hear your laugh again.
To never receive another silly message from you at just the right moment.
To never watch you rolling on your floor cackling and making some REALLY weird animal-like noises.
To never again watch as you brought a special joy and love into the lives of everyone you knew. Family, friend or acquaintance... it didn't matter. You made everyone's life a bit brighter just by being here.
You know, I never really did say goodbye to you. Sure, we gathered and celebrated your life. Yes, we cried and found ourselves all praying that it could be different, that you could be with us still. In a way, though, you are.
In the heart and mind of every person touched by your life, you are with us still.
You always will be.
I wouldn't have it any other way.
G'night, Darwin... Where ever you may be.
I miss you so goddamn much!
It's been one year since you left us.
One looooong year.
People say that you never realize what you've got until it's gone.
It's true.
You were probably one of the few people that I ever really allowed inside my walls. You were one of a handful that actually knew, and cared for, the real me... the person hiding behind the facade. I will never be able to explain it but, for some reason, I never needed, or even felt the need, to hide anything from you. In some ways, you seemed to even mirror me.
There were times when we both acted as if we took each other for granted... times when we might not see or speak to each other for months. But I knew that, if I needed you, you would be there... to talk me down... to cheer me up... hell, just a stupid one-line IM from you could brighten my day sometimes. And, in those rare moments when you needed someone, I was there. It didn't happen often but when it did I was more than happy to do it.
After all, you were a friend.
When I first heard you were gone, I actually laughed. I thought that the person telling me... well, I thought they were setting up a joke. Too soon, I realized that, this time, there was no joke. You were really gone.
Even now, a year later, it's still not really hit home.
To never hear your laugh again.
To never receive another silly message from you at just the right moment.
To never watch you rolling on your floor cackling and making some REALLY weird animal-like noises.
To never again watch as you brought a special joy and love into the lives of everyone you knew. Family, friend or acquaintance... it didn't matter. You made everyone's life a bit brighter just by being here.
You know, I never really did say goodbye to you. Sure, we gathered and celebrated your life. Yes, we cried and found ourselves all praying that it could be different, that you could be with us still. In a way, though, you are.
In the heart and mind of every person touched by your life, you are with us still.
You always will be.
I wouldn't have it any other way.
G'night, Darwin... Where ever you may be.
I miss you so goddamn much!