carpe diem (sorta)
Here is attempt #2 at this meme.
Day 02: Your first love, in great detail
His name was Walter. We met in high school, he was 2 and a half years older then me. At the time I thought the world began and ended with him. We dated off and on for seven and a half years, there were good times and there were some pretty horrible times. I absolutely lost my sense of self in him. My every thought and action was for his approval or to get his attention and it became this negative feedback loop, like a mental trap. It finally died out once I figured out how to be self-confident. Figured out that I didn't NEED the validation that came from him, even though it was half-assed at best as his eye was constantly wandering. In the end I learned some very important things about relationships (like don't be in one that is all about power over another person). I also learned some really important things about myself, and that was more valuable than anything else. I heard (years and years ago) that he still says nasty things about me to our mutual friends, which I consider odd but I guess is a reflection of my level of confidence and what I perceive as his lack thereof.
Day 03: Your parents, in great detail
My Mom is the main caretaker for my Father who has Alzheimers and has basically lost his mind. My Mom is in the hospital right now so I'm on deck as the home nurse and it's pretty fucking awful. My dad and I have never really gotten along very well. Now that he doesn't remember being so utterly awful to me for most of my life he thinks he is my best friend, and I struggle with the memory of the evil man I used to know vs. the confused old gent who currently wanders around the house trying to remember how to make coffee or how to change the tv channel.
Day 04: Your music, in great detail
This doesn't need to be really detailed. When I was a teenager I bought in to that whole music snobbery thing that kids do. Now I couldn't give less of a shit. I freely admit I like music that most people scoff at, like Phil Colins, 80's hair bands and MC Hammer. I like mainsteam stuff and I like underground oddities. Whatever makes me happy, which is mostly rock-ish or industrial-ish but hey - Lady Gaga and Justin Beiber are just as catchy and likely to get stuck in my head.
Day 05: Your definition of love, in great detail
I used to think I knew, but now that I have a kid I know a whole new kind of love. It's TOTALLY different the way you love your kid than the way you love your partner or your family.
The Keith-love I have is based on trust, and equality, and a big goddamn heaping helping of 'I don't give a shit about the little things'. My love for Phoenix is weird and deep and totally mental. I struggle to define it as it's really too new for me just yet, but it's FIERCE.
Day 06: Your hobbies, in great detail
I read. Mostly fiction, and trashy celebrity biographies. I own lots of books, like thousands of books. I live in a three bedroom house and one bedroom (the biggest one) is my library. It's lined with bookshelves and still there are piles of books stacked everywhere and they are trying to take over my house. I can barely navigate through that room because the book mountains are so large and precarious. I live for the day that I win the lottery and I can have a proper library all to myself.
Day 07: Your best friend, in great detail
I don't have one, I barely have friends any more. Shit happens, shitty life stuff happens and when the dust settles you end up alone. I'm the sort of person who backs off when things get tough; when faced with horrible stress I curl up in myself and focus on just getting to the next minute. I become a hermit just to preserve my sanity. Unfortunately that means I was not there for my friends when they went through terrible life things at the same time.
In the end I have Keith, I have his family and my family, and I have some co-workers I am close to, but no 'best friend'.
Day 02: Your first love, in great detail
His name was Walter. We met in high school, he was 2 and a half years older then me. At the time I thought the world began and ended with him. We dated off and on for seven and a half years, there were good times and there were some pretty horrible times. I absolutely lost my sense of self in him. My every thought and action was for his approval or to get his attention and it became this negative feedback loop, like a mental trap. It finally died out once I figured out how to be self-confident. Figured out that I didn't NEED the validation that came from him, even though it was half-assed at best as his eye was constantly wandering. In the end I learned some very important things about relationships (like don't be in one that is all about power over another person). I also learned some really important things about myself, and that was more valuable than anything else. I heard (years and years ago) that he still says nasty things about me to our mutual friends, which I consider odd but I guess is a reflection of my level of confidence and what I perceive as his lack thereof.
Day 03: Your parents, in great detail
My Mom is the main caretaker for my Father who has Alzheimers and has basically lost his mind. My Mom is in the hospital right now so I'm on deck as the home nurse and it's pretty fucking awful. My dad and I have never really gotten along very well. Now that he doesn't remember being so utterly awful to me for most of my life he thinks he is my best friend, and I struggle with the memory of the evil man I used to know vs. the confused old gent who currently wanders around the house trying to remember how to make coffee or how to change the tv channel.
Day 04: Your music, in great detail
This doesn't need to be really detailed. When I was a teenager I bought in to that whole music snobbery thing that kids do. Now I couldn't give less of a shit. I freely admit I like music that most people scoff at, like Phil Colins, 80's hair bands and MC Hammer. I like mainsteam stuff and I like underground oddities. Whatever makes me happy, which is mostly rock-ish or industrial-ish but hey - Lady Gaga and Justin Beiber are just as catchy and likely to get stuck in my head.
Day 05: Your definition of love, in great detail
I used to think I knew, but now that I have a kid I know a whole new kind of love. It's TOTALLY different the way you love your kid than the way you love your partner or your family.
The Keith-love I have is based on trust, and equality, and a big goddamn heaping helping of 'I don't give a shit about the little things'. My love for Phoenix is weird and deep and totally mental. I struggle to define it as it's really too new for me just yet, but it's FIERCE.
Day 06: Your hobbies, in great detail
I read. Mostly fiction, and trashy celebrity biographies. I own lots of books, like thousands of books. I live in a three bedroom house and one bedroom (the biggest one) is my library. It's lined with bookshelves and still there are piles of books stacked everywhere and they are trying to take over my house. I can barely navigate through that room because the book mountains are so large and precarious. I live for the day that I win the lottery and I can have a proper library all to myself.
Day 07: Your best friend, in great detail
I don't have one, I barely have friends any more. Shit happens, shitty life stuff happens and when the dust settles you end up alone. I'm the sort of person who backs off when things get tough; when faced with horrible stress I curl up in myself and focus on just getting to the next minute. I become a hermit just to preserve my sanity. Unfortunately that means I was not there for my friends when they went through terrible life things at the same time.
In the end I have Keith, I have his family and my family, and I have some co-workers I am close to, but no 'best friend'.