A Waste of Minutes
SrgtD: Hi there, this is SrgtD with the National Guard, is Ms. Catta available?
Catta: Speaking...
SrgtD: I saw your resume on CalJobs and wanted to talk to you about a unique opportunity with the National Guards.
Catta: Ok...
SrgtD: Have you ever considered joining the National Guards?
Catta: Ummm...
SrgtD: After basic you'd get training for whatever job you wanted.
Catta: Really? What kind of time frame are we talking here?
SrgtD: Well, basic is 2 months and training is 1 to 18 months.
Catta: Uhhh, well I have pet responsibilities.
SrgtD: Not a problem, once you sign up - you can defer basic for up to 1 year. That should be plenty of time to find a pet care-taker.
Catta: Aren't I bit old for a military career?
SrgtD: How old are you?
Catta: 39
SrgtD: Not a problem. Enlistment age is cut-off at 42. Still plenty of time.
Catta: Don't I have to pass physicals?
SrgtD. Not so much as in being physically fit - more in that you don't have any detrimental health conditions. Do you have any health conditions?
Catta: I'm overweight.
SrgtD: How tall are you and how much to you weigh?
Catta: I'm 5' and *** lbs.
SrgtD: Not a problem. We can design a weight loss program into your basic training.
Catta: Hmmm ... would I have to go overseas?
SrgtD: Well, I know that every one's focus right now is on Afghanistan and Iraq, but we do have other places. And frankly, being female, you wouldn't be put into a combat situation. No killing people for you.
Catta: I see. Well, this is all very interesting. Can you send me more information?
SrgtD: Just go to our web-site www.1800goguard.com and have a look around.
============================================
Catta: So the National Guard tried to recruit me today.
BrotherP: ...
Catta: What do you think? Should I sign-up?
BrotherP: Is this a joke?
Catta: No - why would you say that?
BrotherP: Ummm, you're not what I'd say is 'military material'.
Catta: Hey - I wouldn't have to fight. Probably just file stuff.
BrotherP: Your medical issues would keep you out.
Catta: Actually I'm not sure they would. Broken bones, arthritis, and shot knees aren't considered 'medical conditions'. My weight is and the recruiter was cool with it. As long as they don't expect me to run up a mountain with a tank on my back - I'd probably do ok.
BrotherP: Do you tell him you were vegan?
Catta: No, should I have?
BrotherP: They won't take you.
Catta: What? It's not like eating plants puts me in the same category as murders and pedophiles!
BrotherP: Seriously? They'd take a pedophile over a vegan.
=============================================
Catta: So the National Guard tried to recruit me today.
BrotherJ: Ha ha. Is this a joke?
Catta: Hey! What's up with that?
BrotherJ: You wouldn't fit well in the military.
Catta: Why not?
BrotherJ: Miscreant?
Catta: I follow most laws!
BrotherJ: Doesn't take direction well?
Catta: I can follow orders!
BrotherJ: Stupid orders from people that you are smarter than?
Catta: I .. uhh ...
BrotherJ: You should talk to BrotherP.
Catta: I already did.
BrotherJ: And how did he feel about this?
Catta: He had a definite lack of enthusiasm about the idea.
=================================================
Catta: Hey, the National Guard tried to recruit me today!
MS: Recruit you? You mean they offered you a job?
Catta: No, recruit me. Basic training and everything.
MS: Is this a joke?
Catta: Why does every one keep asking that?
I can only think that I even considered joining up was that I was wearing my new Liberal Patriot top today.
Catta: Speaking...
SrgtD: I saw your resume on CalJobs and wanted to talk to you about a unique opportunity with the National Guards.
Catta: Ok...
SrgtD: Have you ever considered joining the National Guards?
Catta: Ummm...
SrgtD: After basic you'd get training for whatever job you wanted.
Catta: Really? What kind of time frame are we talking here?
SrgtD: Well, basic is 2 months and training is 1 to 18 months.
Catta: Uhhh, well I have pet responsibilities.
SrgtD: Not a problem, once you sign up - you can defer basic for up to 1 year. That should be plenty of time to find a pet care-taker.
Catta: Aren't I bit old for a military career?
SrgtD: How old are you?
Catta: 39
SrgtD: Not a problem. Enlistment age is cut-off at 42. Still plenty of time.
Catta: Don't I have to pass physicals?
SrgtD. Not so much as in being physically fit - more in that you don't have any detrimental health conditions. Do you have any health conditions?
Catta: I'm overweight.
SrgtD: How tall are you and how much to you weigh?
Catta: I'm 5' and *** lbs.
SrgtD: Not a problem. We can design a weight loss program into your basic training.
Catta: Hmmm ... would I have to go overseas?
SrgtD: Well, I know that every one's focus right now is on Afghanistan and Iraq, but we do have other places. And frankly, being female, you wouldn't be put into a combat situation. No killing people for you.
Catta: I see. Well, this is all very interesting. Can you send me more information?
SrgtD: Just go to our web-site www.1800goguard.com and have a look around.
============================================
Catta: So the National Guard tried to recruit me today.
BrotherP: ...
Catta: What do you think? Should I sign-up?
BrotherP: Is this a joke?
Catta: No - why would you say that?
BrotherP: Ummm, you're not what I'd say is 'military material'.
Catta: Hey - I wouldn't have to fight. Probably just file stuff.
BrotherP: Your medical issues would keep you out.
Catta: Actually I'm not sure they would. Broken bones, arthritis, and shot knees aren't considered 'medical conditions'. My weight is and the recruiter was cool with it. As long as they don't expect me to run up a mountain with a tank on my back - I'd probably do ok.
BrotherP: Do you tell him you were vegan?
Catta: No, should I have?
BrotherP: They won't take you.
Catta: What? It's not like eating plants puts me in the same category as murders and pedophiles!
BrotherP: Seriously? They'd take a pedophile over a vegan.
=============================================
Catta: So the National Guard tried to recruit me today.
BrotherJ: Ha ha. Is this a joke?
Catta: Hey! What's up with that?
BrotherJ: You wouldn't fit well in the military.
Catta: Why not?
BrotherJ: Miscreant?
Catta: I follow most laws!
BrotherJ: Doesn't take direction well?
Catta: I can follow orders!
BrotherJ: Stupid orders from people that you are smarter than?
Catta: I .. uhh ...
BrotherJ: You should talk to BrotherP.
Catta: I already did.
BrotherJ: And how did he feel about this?
Catta: He had a definite lack of enthusiasm about the idea.
=================================================
Catta: Hey, the National Guard tried to recruit me today!
MS: Recruit you? You mean they offered you a job?
Catta: No, recruit me. Basic training and everything.
MS: Is this a joke?
Catta: Why does every one keep asking that?
I can only think that I even considered joining up was that I was wearing my new Liberal Patriot top today.