(no subject)
so christmas sucked.
it basically did for everyone
i drank all day long just to deal with my dad, his fiance,her daughter and her daughters b/f. i felt like shit cuz i couldnt get anything for anyone and i told people not to get me anything. well they got me shit.and they seriously should have saved there money . cuz i promise i dont need a coffee mug. or acne treatment. how about a nice gas card? or i dunno.. a gift card for target so i can buy myself some fucking underwear. dont spend 90 dollars on face wash when im in debt and i could use it to pay some of my bills. i seriously dont get it. my own dad doesnt even know me. i also recieved a voicemail from someone ...kinda made my heart stop after i finally realized whos voice it was.. i didnt even recognize him. thats kinda sad..
so im back home.. who knows when im geting kicked out again. be ready. i could need a place to crash.
im really hoping that in 6 months when i turn 21 i get the money that was promised me from my grandpas death. im SUPPOSED to get 10 grand. i need it so badly. i need to get out of this fucking hell hole piece of shit state.
my pea coat was stolen the other night at the gay bar.. caras ipod was stolen along with her 2 coats. this was not our year.
i dont know how it could be this bad. the debt collector people wont stop calling me and i think im gonna give the money i got from christmas..which isnt alot but it was gonna help me survive..and put it towards my bills. im really sad.
i did something really dumb with an ex. really dumb. im a fuckin retard. i create my own drama. without it my life would be boring. maybe thats why i do it. i dont even give a shit though. at least i dont think i do. im kind of a heartless bitch now .
i also gained weight. im not eating anymore.
i had this crazy ass dream last night and it scared the shit out of me.. a fucking nightmare.
i also dreampt about pretty much everyone that i know. fucking weird shit man.
so new years...
about that. going to kris's house.. should be entertaining. i'll be sure to take pictures of the drama as it unfolds. i hope kris still has my fuckin digital over there though. anyways longest entry ever.. time to take a bunch of nyquil just so i can sleep
it basically did for everyone
i drank all day long just to deal with my dad, his fiance,her daughter and her daughters b/f. i felt like shit cuz i couldnt get anything for anyone and i told people not to get me anything. well they got me shit.and they seriously should have saved there money . cuz i promise i dont need a coffee mug. or acne treatment. how about a nice gas card? or i dunno.. a gift card for target so i can buy myself some fucking underwear. dont spend 90 dollars on face wash when im in debt and i could use it to pay some of my bills. i seriously dont get it. my own dad doesnt even know me. i also recieved a voicemail from someone ...kinda made my heart stop after i finally realized whos voice it was.. i didnt even recognize him. thats kinda sad..
so im back home.. who knows when im geting kicked out again. be ready. i could need a place to crash.
im really hoping that in 6 months when i turn 21 i get the money that was promised me from my grandpas death. im SUPPOSED to get 10 grand. i need it so badly. i need to get out of this fucking hell hole piece of shit state.
my pea coat was stolen the other night at the gay bar.. caras ipod was stolen along with her 2 coats. this was not our year.
i dont know how it could be this bad. the debt collector people wont stop calling me and i think im gonna give the money i got from christmas..which isnt alot but it was gonna help me survive..and put it towards my bills. im really sad.
i did something really dumb with an ex. really dumb. im a fuckin retard. i create my own drama. without it my life would be boring. maybe thats why i do it. i dont even give a shit though. at least i dont think i do. im kind of a heartless bitch now .
i also gained weight. im not eating anymore.
i had this crazy ass dream last night and it scared the shit out of me.. a fucking nightmare.
i also dreampt about pretty much everyone that i know. fucking weird shit man.
so new years...
about that. going to kris's house.. should be entertaining. i'll be sure to take pictures of the drama as it unfolds. i hope kris still has my fuckin digital over there though. anyways longest entry ever.. time to take a bunch of nyquil just so i can sleep