Thanksgiving
Well I just got back from going home for Thanksgiving. It was great! I got to see so many people that I have not seen in a while. I got to see my brother, I never get to see him anymore, it makes me sad. I got to see my Mom, and Scott. My Dad, and Darlene. I saw Nicole, Kevin, and Shannon. It felt like the good ol' times, 1am trip to Walmart, and seeing 5 people that I know from school at Walmart at 1am. I went to see the new Harry Potter movie, which was good. I miss being back there with everyone, but I also love it here. There is sooo much snow at home! It is crazy! The roads are not plowed, I thought I was going to die a few times, but I did not. Thanksgiving dinner was amazing. I took Mom and Scott out to breakfast Friday morning to Bob Evans, my treat. So I just had a really good time.
Holidays always have a way of making me feel alone. Even though I have all of my friends and family, I still feel like something is missing. I mean there is Joey and April, Mom and Scott, Dad and Darlene, Shannon and Will, Nicole and Kevin, and Me. It just seems that everyone is paired up but me. This isnt a "feel sorry got myself" moment. It is just the plain truth. I love my family, and I love my friends, but I want someone that I can count on, I want someone that will be there for me, and that I am there for. Basically I want someone that will fill the void that I have. Friends and Family are great, but I want someone to call my own, and who calls me theirs. I have this weakness, when I meet someone, and I start hanging out with them, I start to like them after a matter of time. And I read way more into things that I should. Where they may view a situation as just "hanging out" and "having fun" I may view it as showing interest. But how do you ever really know if someone is showing interest, or if they are just being themselves? It is all just so confusing. So basically I have concluded on this: I have been alone for a long time. Sure, I have had some quick little relationships, but as far as being in a real relationship, it has been a long time. I am used to being on my own, and will continue to be on my own. As of now, I am not looking for someone, if they come to me, then that is great, if they do not, then that is fine. I will survive. OK, so there may be a person that I have interest in, but it is not mutual, so I am doing my best to put that aside, and just be cool with him, and realize that he does not want anything to do with me, and that we are friends, that is all that he ever wants out of it, and that is all that he will let come of it. I think that one of the reasons I took a liking to him, is that he is, for the most part, what I look for in a guy. He is Smart, Funny, has goals (that I know he will achieve), He believes in himself, and believes in others, and he has this way of making everything good, no matter what is going on. I swear, I could come to him one day and tell him that my puppy was ran over by a car, and as soon as I saw him, everything would be super. But anyways, if friends are all we will be, then friends are all we will be. As much as I think it sucks, I will get over it.
So... Yeah... not much else to say. I have to work now in 45 mins.. so peace out home fry.
Holidays always have a way of making me feel alone. Even though I have all of my friends and family, I still feel like something is missing. I mean there is Joey and April, Mom and Scott, Dad and Darlene, Shannon and Will, Nicole and Kevin, and Me. It just seems that everyone is paired up but me. This isnt a "feel sorry got myself" moment. It is just the plain truth. I love my family, and I love my friends, but I want someone that I can count on, I want someone that will be there for me, and that I am there for. Basically I want someone that will fill the void that I have. Friends and Family are great, but I want someone to call my own, and who calls me theirs. I have this weakness, when I meet someone, and I start hanging out with them, I start to like them after a matter of time. And I read way more into things that I should. Where they may view a situation as just "hanging out" and "having fun" I may view it as showing interest. But how do you ever really know if someone is showing interest, or if they are just being themselves? It is all just so confusing. So basically I have concluded on this: I have been alone for a long time. Sure, I have had some quick little relationships, but as far as being in a real relationship, it has been a long time. I am used to being on my own, and will continue to be on my own. As of now, I am not looking for someone, if they come to me, then that is great, if they do not, then that is fine. I will survive. OK, so there may be a person that I have interest in, but it is not mutual, so I am doing my best to put that aside, and just be cool with him, and realize that he does not want anything to do with me, and that we are friends, that is all that he ever wants out of it, and that is all that he will let come of it. I think that one of the reasons I took a liking to him, is that he is, for the most part, what I look for in a guy. He is Smart, Funny, has goals (that I know he will achieve), He believes in himself, and believes in others, and he has this way of making everything good, no matter what is going on. I swear, I could come to him one day and tell him that my puppy was ran over by a car, and as soon as I saw him, everything would be super. But anyways, if friends are all we will be, then friends are all we will be. As much as I think it sucks, I will get over it.
So... Yeah... not much else to say. I have to work now in 45 mins.. so peace out home fry.