(no subject)
here are the moments of the day that stuck out in my head.
1. mrs. atchleys smart comment about my air horn during good news. which was "so do you blow that in your house or do ya just chase your friends with it?" I shoulda said I went golfing with it, bc I did.
2. sitting on the risers in the choir loft for my ta.
3. the seemingly friendless filled hallways today.
4. altoids with trav in 3rd
5. caity and lindsay, not knowing about my braces being off for over 6 months (thanks for noticing my smileless face)
6. the silent one in the hallway it slowed my day down, it broke my heart
7. playing stupid dolly parton, "these old bones" my god.
8. jacking the bass
9. going to shane testing the engine hitting the cat.
10. syrup dipped chicken nuggets at mcdonalds
11. swearving skidding and stalling and burning with t & h
12. ridding to grandveiw
13. the hour long drive afterward, the expenisve thought process.
with # 13 I think I'll make my post
thinking by myself all alone tring to clear my head of the thoughts of #6 and #9. I really thought much deeper, or was I really thinking? I could have been drifting in my head. the tears could have and should have filled me. I shoulda been so bad off I woulda had to pull over from sobbing. well you know what screw the cat it lived. screw # 6 I'll live too. but there is still stuff that I have no idea. I'm bottled up inside. no matter how much I trust anyone or know how much someone loves me, they are stuck inside. I try to be happy and I am. just I am scared. scared of being depressed and scared of being alone.
alone. the way to kill me. the way to tame me. the way to my heart, the way to break it. little things turn into big things. some things should stay small time. I miss being young and care free. when cooties were the same as the black plauge. and friendship was a game and feelings were imposible to hurt. not bc the other person was immune to them but we were all pure of heart. now we all get caught up with materialistic things. looks. stupid looks. oh my, the hair must be good the pants gotta be pretty, I gotta look good.
Its all a load of crap. the age of darkness is here. actually its past. I don't wanna scare anyone and I am rambleing on, and well. I am done. maybe thinking isn't my thing
1. mrs. atchleys smart comment about my air horn during good news. which was "so do you blow that in your house or do ya just chase your friends with it?" I shoulda said I went golfing with it, bc I did.
2. sitting on the risers in the choir loft for my ta.
3. the seemingly friendless filled hallways today.
4. altoids with trav in 3rd
5. caity and lindsay, not knowing about my braces being off for over 6 months (thanks for noticing my smileless face)
6. the silent one in the hallway it slowed my day down, it broke my heart
7. playing stupid dolly parton, "these old bones" my god.
8. jacking the bass
9. going to shane testing the engine hitting the cat.
10. syrup dipped chicken nuggets at mcdonalds
11. swearving skidding and stalling and burning with t & h
12. ridding to grandveiw
13. the hour long drive afterward, the expenisve thought process.
with # 13 I think I'll make my post
thinking by myself all alone tring to clear my head of the thoughts of #6 and #9. I really thought much deeper, or was I really thinking? I could have been drifting in my head. the tears could have and should have filled me. I shoulda been so bad off I woulda had to pull over from sobbing. well you know what screw the cat it lived. screw # 6 I'll live too. but there is still stuff that I have no idea. I'm bottled up inside. no matter how much I trust anyone or know how much someone loves me, they are stuck inside. I try to be happy and I am. just I am scared. scared of being depressed and scared of being alone.
alone. the way to kill me. the way to tame me. the way to my heart, the way to break it. little things turn into big things. some things should stay small time. I miss being young and care free. when cooties were the same as the black plauge. and friendship was a game and feelings were imposible to hurt. not bc the other person was immune to them but we were all pure of heart. now we all get caught up with materialistic things. looks. stupid looks. oh my, the hair must be good the pants gotta be pretty, I gotta look good.
Its all a load of crap. the age of darkness is here. actually its past. I don't wanna scare anyone and I am rambleing on, and well. I am done. maybe thinking isn't my thing