The Last Days of Magic and Glory Chapter #13
In this chapter, Thor and Loki explore their evolving relationship. Warning: this chapter contains explicit content.
Chapter 13: On the Futility of Maintaining a Soap Bubble
“Stay in the palace with me tonight,” Thor pleaded, grasping Loki’s hand in his.
Sif and the warriors three had already ridden off to their homes, leaving Thor, Loki, and Sleipnir alone at the edge of the wood. Their kiss from the first night had been repeated three times the subsequent night, before they had to return to the palace today. Thor could recite a ballad about every one. Each time, Thor had felt nearly giddy with the rush of it, but they had not tried for more. Thor didn’t need any more questions from his warrior friends and though he responded enthusiastically, Loki had yet to initiate.
“You know I can’t do that,” Loki replied. “I have to stay with Sleipnir.”
“Bring him as well,” Thor replied.
“A horse in your rooms? I doubt mother would approve.”
“Mother will not know of it. You can make both of you invisible in order to get to my rooms.”
Loki sighed, exasperated. “Why are you so determined on this? We have been sleeping outdoors for a year now. What has changed?”
Honestly, Thor had no idea. Even if they wanted to lay together, being outdoors had never stopped either of them in the past. He shrugged. “I miss it. But I would rather be with you than sleep in my bed, so if you do not want to, we can wait until you have weaned Sleipnir.”
Loki frowned. “The absolute earliest he can be weaned is in a week, but I would prefer to give him milk until he no longer cares for it, which could be when he is a yearling.”
“But in a week you will not need to feed him constantly as you do now?”
“No. But it will be hard to explain my comings and goings from the stables and I do not,” he paused, looking lovingly at his son, “I would rather that he did not sleep alone.”
“There is the terrace garden attached to my rooms. I have never had it well-maintained, so the gardeners will not be upset if I let a horse stay there. He could spend the days in the pasture and afternoons and evenings there.”
“The terrace garden is far from my rooms.” As children, they had shared a room and as teens their rooms had been on the same hall as their parents. But after some fight between Odin and Loki that Thor could not remember, Loki had moved far away from the rest of the family, near the central library.
Thor frowned. “You would move into mine.”
“Why would I do that? I am a prince, Thor, not your body servant. You can’t just order me to move into your rooms because you want things your way.”
“But I thought . . .” Of course this could not be easy. If Loki was involved, it could never be easy. “We have not spent a night apart for a year now. I enjoy having you near.” Thor cupped Loki’s cheek, drawing him in, but Loki leaned away.
“Thinking was probably your first mistake,” Loki snapped, striding hurriedly away from Thor and stripping out of his tunic in preparation for his transformation back into a horse.
Thor couldn’t help it; when Loki snapped and acted moody it was Thor’s learned habit to anger. “Why do resist me, Loki? It is a simple request. No harm will come to you from it.”
“You act like a spoiled child, Thor. You are too accustomed to getting your way. It doesn’t matter if harm will come to me. I do not desire it and no tantrum of yours will make me do what I do not want to.”
Thor sighed. As always, Loki twisted Thor’s words. Thor wished, not for the first time, that he was clever enough to speak in ways that Loki could not misinterpret. “Loki, I am not trying to control you. I just want to sleep beside you in a bed, like when we were children and you needed my comfort.”
“Yes, because that’s what this is about, isn’t it? Me needing you. You like having me completely dependent on you, like when we were children and I still thought you could protect me from monsters.”
“You do still need protection!” Thor protested. He knew that Loki had fought beside him in many a battle, defended him at Court, found a way to survive all kinds of adventure, but Loki was also the man whose soft lips had brushed against Thor’s so delicately and the boy who had snuck under the furs in Thor’s bed at night, pulling him close like a talisman against the evils of the world.
Loki balled his hands up into fists, seething. Before he could open his mouth, Thor realized his mistake and quickly retreated. “We all need protection.”
“And you, the mighty Thor, the unstoppable warrior, universally loved, the heir to the throne?” Loki scoffed. “You have not thought for one moment that you are in need of protection.”
“You think me so arrogant that I do not recognize all the ways that you protect me without my asking? The diversions at Court, the way you cleaned up the mess I made with Seupu despite being a horse at the time, the way you guide me now?”
Loki seemed to deflate a little. He was still resentful, but the anger had cooled. “You have always been too arrogant to notice.”
Loki was right, of course. Before this year, Thor had always seen himself as an excellent leader. When he did appear at court, currying favor had been effortless and Thor had never stopped to question why. But there had been many hard lessons this year, chief among them was the realization that he could fail. And the corollary was that if he wanted to succeed, Thor would need to ask for help. He had not asked for help in the past, but Thor had always received it and he was grateful for that show of love.
“Perhaps I have been, but are you so arrogant that you would have me remain that way so that you might have reason to continue to resent me? I need you to protect me and I always have. Let me do the same for you.”
Loki looked down at his hands, but the tense line of his mouth softened just slightly. Thor was actually winning an argument against his silver-tongued brother! He was wearing Loki down and persuading him! He only just managed to contain the smile that would give the whole thing away.
“I am not trying to control you,” Thor pushed forward. “If anything, you control me. But instead of manipulating me into doing what you want, do not be too prideful to ask for it. And do not ask me as an order or to show your power. Ask me as a favor, as though I have the free will to deny you. And instead of hiding your fears and your desires with anger, just tell me what it is you feel and together we can decide a way forward that satisfies us both. We are unstoppable together, Loki. We must not squander that by fighting.”
After a long moment of contemplation, Loki once again met Thor’s eyes. His eyes were shining in that way only Loki seemed to achieve - as though they were so overfull with tears that the eyeball itself were made of them and yet somehow, by magic, they did not spill. “My true feelings?”
Thor nodded, his heart hammering in his chest as though this were some great battle.
Loki looked almost in a trance, as though he needed to cast a spell to invoke his own emotions. “Confusion, bewilderment, love, bitterness, fear, skepticism, desire, loathing, paranoia, tenderness, regret.”
Of course Loki would give Thor everything and nothing at once. “Care to explain?”
At first it looked as though Loki would refuse and continue to hold himself behind a shield, but he sat down on a log stiffly and recited to the air an arm’s length away from Thor’s hip, “Confusion about what it is you hope to gain from me. Bewilderment that you have for some reason decided to seek a carnal relationship. Love for you as my brother. Bitterness that I have put myself in a situation where I must rely on you. Skepticism that this folly you currently seek must end in disaster. Loathing because my life is a prison and you are as much my jailer as you are the balm that soothes my confinement. Paranoia that you have some other motive. Tenderness towards you, for how much you have changed this year. Regret that soon all this life we have made for ourselves will come to an end and I will have to face the consequences. Did I forget anything?”
As a strategy, overwhelming Thor’s mind with unprocessable emotional revelation seemed to be working. But there was something that Loki forgot to mention - most likely deliberately. It was the most important thing of all. Thor kneeled in the fallen leaves and took Loki’s hands in his. “You forgot fear, brother. What is it that you are afraid of?”
“While you rely on instinct, I have always relied on reason and intellect. I make plans and, I admit, I scheme. I try to take into account your volatility and you are right, sometimes I manipulate it, but I could not have planned for this folly that you now seek, Thor. I cannot reason my way forward. The entire idea of it is so unfathomable and so wide-reaching that I cannot imagine how we will live our lives from this moment forward. I am overwhelmed by all the reasons we should not.”
“Sif said that such relations between brothers are not prohibited.”
Loki rolled his eyes. “And Sif, the maiden who trampled ages of tradition to become a warrior, is the grand arbiter of propriety? Just because it is not prohibited, does not mean we should. We are not two pig farmers or warriors stuck in battle a long way from home. We are the princes of Asgard and everything we do is political. And even excepting the citizenry, what of our parents? They hope to see you wedded to a future queen and for me, a political marriage, I am sure. If we are to become lovers, Thor, then will we still be brothers? And when it is over and we are to be married, will we still be brothers or will we be those empty shells who remain when love is lost? I fear that you have set us on a path that will destroy us.”
Thor felt the storm of anger brewing in him once again. If Loki thought this was such a terrible idea, why had he kissed Thor in return? Why had he practically enchanted Thor with his talk of passion and that magical lakeside? And why would Loki, who had always been so quick to remind Thor of his stupidity, fail to be the voice of reason now, when there was so much to lose?
Thor did not want to be Loki’s lover if it meant crippling him with fear. I was clear that he needed Loki now more than ever and if the price of keeping him was to let go of the thing he most wanted, Thor would do it. “If you do not want this, Loki, then we will end it and not think of it again.”
How Loki managed to look at once resigned and mischievous, Thor did not know. “But, Thor, you did not notice that I forgot to explain one more thing. Desire.”
A tentative smile crept onto Thor’s lips. “So that means . . . you desire me?”
“Valhalla help me, but I do.”
Thor surged forward, capturing Loki’s lips in a fierce kiss. This was the first time that their kiss was not tender, but somehow this kiss was more vulnerable for it. No, not vulnerable . . . raw. Loki kissed like a man who was in no need of protection, who had nothing whatsoever to fear. They kissed like they fought: intense, well-matched, a little bit rude, and full of passion.
Before he knew it, Thor had inserted himself between Loki’s knees and was pulling Loki to him so that their manhoods brushed against each other. The hot pressure of Loki’s hardness against his only drove Thor deep into that frantic place of pure instinct that he only reached in lust and battle. He pushed himself against Loki with such force that they both toppled off the log and into a pile of leaves behind it. Thor laughed, before diving back in for another of Loki’s intense kisses. He did not think he would ever tire of them.
“Wait!” Loki commanded, pushing Thor off him and sitting up. His cheeks were flushed like on a hot day and he barely caught his breath, his long black hair full of leaves and his eyes grinning with devious delight. He looked so deliciously debauched that Thor could barely contain his desire to push him back on the ground and ravish him.
But then Thor followed Loki’s gaze to where Sleipnir was now standing, staring that them as though he had never seen them before. Thor momentarily debated - it was wrong to copulate in front of children, but not wrong to copulate in front of horses (Thor had done so more times than he could count). But then Thor looked into Sleipnir’s too intelligent eyes and sighed. “I remember long ago that father claimed we owed him a hundred years of interruptions. I think I know what he meant now,” Thor complained.
Loki pushed himself off the forest floor, daintily brushing the leaves from his pants and picking them out of his hair. “I think maybe I will join you in the palace tonight after all. Sleipnir will be able to entertain himself in the terrace garden for a little while.”
***
They decided that Loki should return to his horse form and both he and Sleipnir would accompany Thor up the narrow stone steps that lead to his private terrace garden. Thor and Loki had often used those steps as young men in order to come and go from the palace without their parent’s scrutiny. They knew that Heimdall was still watching, so it wasn’t true stealth, but it made them feel thrilled with their mischievous deception nonetheless.
Sleipnir seemed contented to play in the garden, especially entranced by the brightly colored fish that swam in the small pond. Thor pulled Loki down into his lap on a stone bench, kissing him deeply.
“When he goes to sleep, Thor,” Loki said with a husky whisper.
“I do not know how you manage such restraint,” Thor complained, knowing that his caresses and soft kisses were only making things worse. He could not seem to help himself.
“Yes, I suppose mental discipline was never a skill of yours,” Loki teased.
They let Sleipnir follow them into Thor’s rooms. Unlike many rooms in the palace, most of the floor was covered in soft fur rugs from Thor’s various hunts. It was so different than Loki’s rooms, which were stark and modern. Even his library appeared to be just a room with obsidian walls and a single blackwood desk. The many books were tucked away into a pocket of space at the back of the room that Loki opened by magic. Thor had never been inside, noting only that if Loki went to retrieve a book it looked like he stepped into darkness itself. Everything about Loki’s chambers screamed that he relied on magic and not the everyday conveniences utilized by most Aesir. Even the lights were glowing orbs that hovered in the air and only lit in Loki’s presence.
Thor’s rooms were lit with lamps and cluttered by comparison, filled with rich wooden shelves that housed a mix of weaponry, books, and other treasures discovered in quests. Unlike his parents, or Loki, Thor kept most of the gifts given to him by foreign dignitaries and grateful subjects. A diverse array of art and tapestries hung on his walls alongside decorative shields, pottery, weavings, and whatever else people saw fit to give him. What he couldn’t fit on his walls or on the single high shelf that ran close to the ceiling around the entirety of his rooms, he kept in an enchanted space like Loki’s library. Sif jokingly referred to it as his trophy room. Thor didn’t really care about all of the stuff or its absence, but it seemed rude to just get rid of it.
When previously Thor had felt comfortable amid the chaos, he now felt uneasy. Despite being infinitely more complex than a single room could be, nature felt simple in so many ways. No wonder Loki kept his rooms so free of clutter.
“It is not how I remember it,” Thor complained.
“I assure you, it is just as much a disaster as you left it. I pity the poor servants that come in here to clean.”
Thor shrugged. “They have cleaners that vanish the dust.”
“Ah, but in order to vanish the dust, the cleaning device must be able to see it. Imagine how many objects they must move to clean behind them.”
Thor felt suddenly guilty. “I did not know that.” He resolved, “if you come to stay here, I will move all of these objects to my ‘trophy room’ and we can decorate it more like yours.”
Loki sighed. “You still want that? This is new, Thor. Let us have a try before you make any grand declarations of affection.”
“I would declare right now that I . . .”
Loki pressed a finger to Thor’s lips. “Shhh. Don’t ruin the moment.”
Loki pushed Thor back onto the bed, straddling him and grabbing Thor’s hardness in a way that was more possessive than tender. Thor looked around for Sleipnir, but the horse had clearly lost interest with being inside and had returned to the garden. Thor noted that Loki must have magicked the door closed behind him.
Loki grinned, pushing Thor’s tunic off his shoulders and kissing down his abdomen. Thor sighed, running his fingers through Loki’s hair as he yanked open Thor’s trousers. Loki looked up through his long black lashes. In this moment, he seemed to be a creature of pure mischief, so smug with the way he teased Thor with his breath and his light touches - so close and yet denying Thor what he really wanted. Thor groaned, dropping his head back onto the pillow and fisting his fingers in the furs.
Thor did not know how long he allowed Loki to tease him, but enough was enough. He growled, hooking a leg over Loki’s and flipping them over, off the bed and onto the soft bearskin rug beside it. Loki huffed at the rough treatment, but neither of them was fragile.
Thor looked down into familiar green eyes, wondering how he could have possibly missed how beautiful Loki was for more than a thousand years. Loki did not have the muscle-bound physique of Thor’s typical conquest or the blond hair that was practically the standard of beauty in Asgard. But the way his pale skin contrasted with his dark hair and intense green eyes was exotic somehow. Then there were the high cheekbones and the delicate perfection of his musculature - not large, but well defined. Thor didn’t think he’d ever desired anyone more.
Thor ripped Loki’s dirty tunic away and pulled his pants down with one swift motion, following it with a searing kiss. They rutted up against each other like frantic beasts. Thor had done this many times with both men and women, but somehow the fact that it was Loki, with a year of magic and a millenium of history between them, lit a fire in Thor’s blood that he had not felt outside the heat of battle.
Of course that was when their mother walked in.
“Thor?” she called. “Heimdall tells me that you have finally returned to your chambers.”
Thor hastily pulled his tunic closed and tightened the fastening on his pants before standing up. He was incredibly relieved that they had fallen onto the opposite side of the bed from the door.
“Mother.”
Frigga frowned. “What are you doing down there?”
Thor shrugged, trying to look innocent. His mother surely did not want to know what he had been doing. “I am an adult, mother. You should not still be able to enter my chambers as you please.”
“Oh, Thor,” Frigga laughed, “to me, you will always be my little boy.”
Loki rolled his eyes from where he had moved to sit in an intricately carved chair by the wall. He had no doubt made himself invisible to Frigga.
“What brings you here, mother?” Thor asked. “I am tired from my journey with my friends and wish to rest.”
“It is the War Council. Tyr sends his summons for an emergency session.”
Thor nodded. “I will join them as soon as I have changed my clothes.”
Frigga smiled then, stepping forward to embrace her son. “I am happy you have returned to make the palace your home once again, Thor. It is difficult on a mother when both her sons leave her nest.”
“Do not fret, mother. I have returned and I hope Loki will do so as well.”
Loki scowled, but did not say anything. He did look fondly at their mother, however. Thor figured that Loki must have missed her as much as she missed him. Before he became mired in sympathy, Thor had to remind himself that Loki’s current exile was of his own choosing. He could freely return to court if only he admitted Sleipnir’s origins.
Frigga pulled back. “Tell me truly, my son. Do you know of Loki’s whereabouts? I do not need to see him if he does not wish it. I only want him to know that he has my love.”
Thor stared at Loki over Frigga’s shoulder. “I assure you mother, he already knows.”
But Frigga had never been one to be swayed by sentimentality. She smiled at Thor, but pressed on. “And I need to know that he is safe,” she added.
Thor clasped her hands, knowing that Loki would be angry with him later, but he couldn’t stand to let his mother worry. “I promise, mother. Loki is safe. He will return to us soon.”
Frigga’s smile was brilliant. She embraced Thor again, squeezing tight this time. When they were children, Frigga’s hugs had felt unshakable and all-encompassing. Her body surrounding Thor was a balm for any ill. But now, his mother’s love could not protect him from the world - not from Loki’s angry glare, or the trouble brewing in Jotunheim, or the dangerous passion she had interrupted.
Frigga planted a kiss on the top of Thor’s head, before clasping his hand. “Come, my son, we must find Tyr.”
***
Thor returned to his rooms angry. He slammed the door open hard enough to send a elven vase smashing to the ground. Thor ignored the pieces of broken ceramic and searched the room for Loki. The Jotun had refused the investigators’ demands to see King Laufey and now they were putting Thor in a position to look weak if he did not take some form of retribution. But the Jotun lived in barren world full of ice and dying things - how could Thor possibly punish them further without inciting a war? None of his council held the answer. The only good spot in all this was that now that she knew, it was Sif who suggested they leave the decision until morning, smirking knowingly at Thor the entire time. They both hoped that Loki had the answer because neither of them did.
But Loki was not in the chambers. Had he left? Thor panicked, rushing out onto the terrace garden. Sleipnir was sleeping beneath a tree, seeming to be unconcerned with Loki’s absence, so the prince could not have wandered far. Thor was about to head for the stone steps when he realized that there was only one place Loki could be (assuming he was not making himself invisible in order to taunt Thor).
Thor walked into his bathing room to find Loki kneeling in front of three candles. Thor admired the sleek lines of his naked back, the curve of his shoulder bones, the way his waist tapered, the luminous quality of his pale skin in the candlelight.
The washroom was the opposite of the rest of Thor’s dwelling. There was not a single extraneous item or a single item out of place. The walls were painted deep red, the color of dried blood. The floor was a dark, living stone cultivated on Alfheim which breathed in air and emitted heat, giving the stone beneath Thor’s feet a perpetual warmth. The bath itself was a sunken pool surrounded by a stone bench. Quite a few people could probably fit in the bath, but there was not enough room to swim. Hot water sluiced gently down one entire wall of the room and out over a ledge to create a small waterfall before tumbling into the main bath.
Loki did not turn at Thor’s entrance, but Thor had never once snuck up on him, so he knew his brother was aware of his presence. There was an enforced stillness to the room, a silence that spoke of ritual. Thor’s rant about the boldness of the Jotuns died on his lips. He pulled off his ceremonial armor with haste and left it outside the bathing room door before closing it.
Thor walked around Loki and kneeled facing him. Thor could tell by the selection of candles that this was a familiar ritual from their youth - a blessing for the brotherly bond to be performed each year on the day of the new year. Loki had since expressed his skepticism at such ‘superstitious nonsense,’ but if Loki wanted to bless their bond, then Thor would not argue, even if it was not the new year. When they were children, they would squirm at the silence required for this particular ritual, but now stillness came easily.
They focused their eyes on each other. Loki’s were soft with remembrance, his lips half smirking as usual. Loki waved his hand, setting a small reed on fire. Thor used the new magic Loki had taught him to light the other, almost jumping at the overzealous bonfire he created at the tip of the thing. Loki grinned at Thor’s clumsy magic but did not speak. He lit the candle on the right and Thor the one on the left. They then lit the center candle together. It was a special candle whose flame burned purple, spreading the scent of fresh pine throughout the bathing room.
They stood in unison, moving to the heated smokestone in the corner. A pitcher of water already waited there along with a small silver blade. It was flat and wide and intricate, looking more like a pennant or a letter holder with one end a triangle and the other as round as half a circle. Loki used it to poke a small hole in his thumb, dropping the blood into the golden pitcher. Thor did the same. The pinpricks healed almost instantly, but something in the blade always made Thor’s veins feel on fire, like ants crawling in his blood. Together they grasped the pitcher and doused the water over the smokestone. Steam billowed up from it, casting the room in a warm mist.
Next, they walked to separate sides of the bath and slid in. The bathwater was warm, not scalding hot as Thor preferred it. But Loki had never liked heat and Thor would not make him uncomfortable. Loki offered a small vial of sandalwood scented soap to Thor, who poured a small drop into his palms and worked it into a lather. He washed Loki’s hair and shoulders as required by the ritual, but this time instead of doing a haphazard, perfunctory job out of awkwardness, he messaged Loki’s scalp and shoulders, pulling Loki back against him until Loki was sitting on one of Thor’s thighs.
When Thor finished his ministrations, Loki turned around, straddling Thor on the bench and washing his hair in turn, his eyes never leaving Thor’s face. There was something undefinable in his expression, an amused contentment combined with something much darker, fatalistic.
When Loki finished, they stood together under the waterfall, letting it rinse the soap from their hair. They both ducked down under the surface of the water and were supposed to arise new men for a new year with all the strains of their brotherly bond repaired. Thor had always felt refreshed after the ritual, but this year, he felt powerful and peaceful at once, like he need only wish and his wants would materialize.
He pulled Loki to him under the artificial waterfall, devouring his mouth in a decidedly not-brotherly kiss. Loki returned the kiss, his fingers tangling in Thor’s hair. Thor pushed Loki back under the waterfall to the wall beneath the ledge and Loki wrapped his legs around Thor’s waist so that they rubbed against each other. Thor was used to deep grunts of passion, but Loki’s breath came in small panted moans, sometimes smothered by Thor’s lips on his.
Loki summoned a vial of oil and Thor used it to prepare him to an accompaniment of gasps and groans. Loki’s hands would no doubt leave bruises on Thor’s shoulders where he pulled him in closer, but Thor didn’t care. He had never wanted anything as much as he wanted to take Loki, to make him Thor’s in every way. Perhaps Loki was right and Thor did want control. But he didn’t want it for his own power or aggrandizement. He wanted it because without control, he could not keep Loki with him, writhing and moaning Thor’s name as he did now.
When the time came, and Thor was about to sink into Loki’s welcoming heat, Loki’s previously closed eyes opened and he whispered to Thor, “Please be careful.”
“Of course, I will always be careful with you,” Thor replied earnestly, laying delicate kisses on Loki’s collarbone to prove it.
“Oh, I prefer if you are not always careful with me. Only now is the first time since . . .” Loki could not say since he was violated by a horse. “It is the first time in a long time.”
Thor kissed him tenderly. “You need not worry, brother. I will take good care of you.”
Loki winced. “Grant me a favor, Thor: do not call me brother when we are like this.”
“Lover, then? Dearest? Heartsong?”
Loki rolled his eyes. “Call me Loki and I will call you . . .” his voice trailed off into a moan as Thor entered him.
“Yes, I should like if you call me that all the time,” Thor panted, trying to restrain himself from madly thrusting. Once Thor bottomed out, they both took a moment to catch their breaths. Thor did not need to ask, just look into Loki’s eyes to know that he could move now. Under the ledge, with the water sluicing down behind them, just skimming Thor’s back when he drew out of Loki before plunging back in again, it felt like their own private world, separated by a wall of water from the troubles of the kingdom and the trials of Thor’s rule.
The world narrowed until it was just Loki’s moans, the sound of water, the feeling of floating, and Thor chasing his climax like the greatest of all quests. Loki reached completion first, digging his fingers into Thor’s back and clenching around Thor with a strangled gasp. It did not take Thor much longer, only a few more hard thrusts and he was spilling himself inside Loki with a grunt. When pulled back, Loki’s skin was dripping with sweat and dewdrops of mist from the water and the smokestone.
He pressed one last kiss to Loki’s lips before sliding out of him and pulling him to sit between Thor’s legs on one of the benches while they both caught their breaths.
After a long moment, Loki pulled away and ducked under the water to wash off the sweat of their exertions and smooth back his hair.
Thor did the same before he pulled Loki back into his lap, wrapping him in a tight embrace and nuzzling his neck. “Why the Ritual of the Renewal of Brotherhood?”
Loki shrugged. “We missed it this past New Year.”
“We have missed it the past hundreds of years due to your skepticism. Have you had a change of heart?”
Loki shrugged. “No, just a sense of irony.”
“Say what you will, Loki, but I will continue to believe that our relationship has fallen into disrepair over the years we have neglected the ritual and now we are committed to repair the damage we have wrought in our neglect.”
“Superstition andsentiment, but I should expect no less from you, Thor.”
“Though I suppose I can appreciate the irony as well,” Thor added. “That last part of the ritual was less than brotherly.”
Loki laughed. “Indeed it was.”
As their bodies and the water around them cooled, the rest of the world returned. “Loki, King Laufey and his sons have left the palace. We know not where they have disappeared to and the frost giants will not tell us. We do not know what to do. You must come with me tomorrow to the Council and advise us. We will say you are weak from your travels so you might have excuse to return frequently to feed Sleipnir.”
Loki pulled out of Thor’s arms. For a second Thor worried that this would turn into another fight about Thor trying to control him, but Loki only looked defeated, not angry. “I can’t, Thor.”
“I promise that no one will discover Sleipnir’s origins.”
“It’s not that,” Loki replied. “Everything is so good, Thor. I have Sleipnir and you and our friends are treating me better than they ever have.” Thor grinned just at the fact that Loki called them ‘our’ friends. “This last year has stripped me of my defenses, Thor. I’m not ready to fact our mother’s concern and disapproval or the scorn and rumor of the Court. You told me to ask for what I need and you would grant it. Grant me just a little more of this peace.”
Loki sounded sincere, but then he often did when he was lying. In the end, Thor supposed it didn’t matter why Loki did not want to return. It only mattered that he did not. Thor kissed him. “I will, so long as you continue to advise me. But Loki, you must know that all things eventually come to an end. What was it that father always said about peace?”
“It is as impossible to maintain as the integrity of a soap bubble,” Loki supplied. “I will return when it is necessary, Thor, but no sooner.”
Next Chapter: Preemptive Strikes
Chapter 13: On the Futility of Maintaining a Soap Bubble
“Stay in the palace with me tonight,” Thor pleaded, grasping Loki’s hand in his.
Sif and the warriors three had already ridden off to their homes, leaving Thor, Loki, and Sleipnir alone at the edge of the wood. Their kiss from the first night had been repeated three times the subsequent night, before they had to return to the palace today. Thor could recite a ballad about every one. Each time, Thor had felt nearly giddy with the rush of it, but they had not tried for more. Thor didn’t need any more questions from his warrior friends and though he responded enthusiastically, Loki had yet to initiate.
“You know I can’t do that,” Loki replied. “I have to stay with Sleipnir.”
“Bring him as well,” Thor replied.
“A horse in your rooms? I doubt mother would approve.”
“Mother will not know of it. You can make both of you invisible in order to get to my rooms.”
Loki sighed, exasperated. “Why are you so determined on this? We have been sleeping outdoors for a year now. What has changed?”
Honestly, Thor had no idea. Even if they wanted to lay together, being outdoors had never stopped either of them in the past. He shrugged. “I miss it. But I would rather be with you than sleep in my bed, so if you do not want to, we can wait until you have weaned Sleipnir.”
Loki frowned. “The absolute earliest he can be weaned is in a week, but I would prefer to give him milk until he no longer cares for it, which could be when he is a yearling.”
“But in a week you will not need to feed him constantly as you do now?”
“No. But it will be hard to explain my comings and goings from the stables and I do not,” he paused, looking lovingly at his son, “I would rather that he did not sleep alone.”
“There is the terrace garden attached to my rooms. I have never had it well-maintained, so the gardeners will not be upset if I let a horse stay there. He could spend the days in the pasture and afternoons and evenings there.”
“The terrace garden is far from my rooms.” As children, they had shared a room and as teens their rooms had been on the same hall as their parents. But after some fight between Odin and Loki that Thor could not remember, Loki had moved far away from the rest of the family, near the central library.
Thor frowned. “You would move into mine.”
“Why would I do that? I am a prince, Thor, not your body servant. You can’t just order me to move into your rooms because you want things your way.”
“But I thought . . .” Of course this could not be easy. If Loki was involved, it could never be easy. “We have not spent a night apart for a year now. I enjoy having you near.” Thor cupped Loki’s cheek, drawing him in, but Loki leaned away.
“Thinking was probably your first mistake,” Loki snapped, striding hurriedly away from Thor and stripping out of his tunic in preparation for his transformation back into a horse.
Thor couldn’t help it; when Loki snapped and acted moody it was Thor’s learned habit to anger. “Why do resist me, Loki? It is a simple request. No harm will come to you from it.”
“You act like a spoiled child, Thor. You are too accustomed to getting your way. It doesn’t matter if harm will come to me. I do not desire it and no tantrum of yours will make me do what I do not want to.”
Thor sighed. As always, Loki twisted Thor’s words. Thor wished, not for the first time, that he was clever enough to speak in ways that Loki could not misinterpret. “Loki, I am not trying to control you. I just want to sleep beside you in a bed, like when we were children and you needed my comfort.”
“Yes, because that’s what this is about, isn’t it? Me needing you. You like having me completely dependent on you, like when we were children and I still thought you could protect me from monsters.”
“You do still need protection!” Thor protested. He knew that Loki had fought beside him in many a battle, defended him at Court, found a way to survive all kinds of adventure, but Loki was also the man whose soft lips had brushed against Thor’s so delicately and the boy who had snuck under the furs in Thor’s bed at night, pulling him close like a talisman against the evils of the world.
Loki balled his hands up into fists, seething. Before he could open his mouth, Thor realized his mistake and quickly retreated. “We all need protection.”
“And you, the mighty Thor, the unstoppable warrior, universally loved, the heir to the throne?” Loki scoffed. “You have not thought for one moment that you are in need of protection.”
“You think me so arrogant that I do not recognize all the ways that you protect me without my asking? The diversions at Court, the way you cleaned up the mess I made with Seupu despite being a horse at the time, the way you guide me now?”
Loki seemed to deflate a little. He was still resentful, but the anger had cooled. “You have always been too arrogant to notice.”
Loki was right, of course. Before this year, Thor had always seen himself as an excellent leader. When he did appear at court, currying favor had been effortless and Thor had never stopped to question why. But there had been many hard lessons this year, chief among them was the realization that he could fail. And the corollary was that if he wanted to succeed, Thor would need to ask for help. He had not asked for help in the past, but Thor had always received it and he was grateful for that show of love.
“Perhaps I have been, but are you so arrogant that you would have me remain that way so that you might have reason to continue to resent me? I need you to protect me and I always have. Let me do the same for you.”
Loki looked down at his hands, but the tense line of his mouth softened just slightly. Thor was actually winning an argument against his silver-tongued brother! He was wearing Loki down and persuading him! He only just managed to contain the smile that would give the whole thing away.
“I am not trying to control you,” Thor pushed forward. “If anything, you control me. But instead of manipulating me into doing what you want, do not be too prideful to ask for it. And do not ask me as an order or to show your power. Ask me as a favor, as though I have the free will to deny you. And instead of hiding your fears and your desires with anger, just tell me what it is you feel and together we can decide a way forward that satisfies us both. We are unstoppable together, Loki. We must not squander that by fighting.”
After a long moment of contemplation, Loki once again met Thor’s eyes. His eyes were shining in that way only Loki seemed to achieve - as though they were so overfull with tears that the eyeball itself were made of them and yet somehow, by magic, they did not spill. “My true feelings?”
Thor nodded, his heart hammering in his chest as though this were some great battle.
Loki looked almost in a trance, as though he needed to cast a spell to invoke his own emotions. “Confusion, bewilderment, love, bitterness, fear, skepticism, desire, loathing, paranoia, tenderness, regret.”
Of course Loki would give Thor everything and nothing at once. “Care to explain?”
At first it looked as though Loki would refuse and continue to hold himself behind a shield, but he sat down on a log stiffly and recited to the air an arm’s length away from Thor’s hip, “Confusion about what it is you hope to gain from me. Bewilderment that you have for some reason decided to seek a carnal relationship. Love for you as my brother. Bitterness that I have put myself in a situation where I must rely on you. Skepticism that this folly you currently seek must end in disaster. Loathing because my life is a prison and you are as much my jailer as you are the balm that soothes my confinement. Paranoia that you have some other motive. Tenderness towards you, for how much you have changed this year. Regret that soon all this life we have made for ourselves will come to an end and I will have to face the consequences. Did I forget anything?”
As a strategy, overwhelming Thor’s mind with unprocessable emotional revelation seemed to be working. But there was something that Loki forgot to mention - most likely deliberately. It was the most important thing of all. Thor kneeled in the fallen leaves and took Loki’s hands in his. “You forgot fear, brother. What is it that you are afraid of?”
“While you rely on instinct, I have always relied on reason and intellect. I make plans and, I admit, I scheme. I try to take into account your volatility and you are right, sometimes I manipulate it, but I could not have planned for this folly that you now seek, Thor. I cannot reason my way forward. The entire idea of it is so unfathomable and so wide-reaching that I cannot imagine how we will live our lives from this moment forward. I am overwhelmed by all the reasons we should not.”
“Sif said that such relations between brothers are not prohibited.”
Loki rolled his eyes. “And Sif, the maiden who trampled ages of tradition to become a warrior, is the grand arbiter of propriety? Just because it is not prohibited, does not mean we should. We are not two pig farmers or warriors stuck in battle a long way from home. We are the princes of Asgard and everything we do is political. And even excepting the citizenry, what of our parents? They hope to see you wedded to a future queen and for me, a political marriage, I am sure. If we are to become lovers, Thor, then will we still be brothers? And when it is over and we are to be married, will we still be brothers or will we be those empty shells who remain when love is lost? I fear that you have set us on a path that will destroy us.”
Thor felt the storm of anger brewing in him once again. If Loki thought this was such a terrible idea, why had he kissed Thor in return? Why had he practically enchanted Thor with his talk of passion and that magical lakeside? And why would Loki, who had always been so quick to remind Thor of his stupidity, fail to be the voice of reason now, when there was so much to lose?
Thor did not want to be Loki’s lover if it meant crippling him with fear. I was clear that he needed Loki now more than ever and if the price of keeping him was to let go of the thing he most wanted, Thor would do it. “If you do not want this, Loki, then we will end it and not think of it again.”
How Loki managed to look at once resigned and mischievous, Thor did not know. “But, Thor, you did not notice that I forgot to explain one more thing. Desire.”
A tentative smile crept onto Thor’s lips. “So that means . . . you desire me?”
“Valhalla help me, but I do.”
Thor surged forward, capturing Loki’s lips in a fierce kiss. This was the first time that their kiss was not tender, but somehow this kiss was more vulnerable for it. No, not vulnerable . . . raw. Loki kissed like a man who was in no need of protection, who had nothing whatsoever to fear. They kissed like they fought: intense, well-matched, a little bit rude, and full of passion.
Before he knew it, Thor had inserted himself between Loki’s knees and was pulling Loki to him so that their manhoods brushed against each other. The hot pressure of Loki’s hardness against his only drove Thor deep into that frantic place of pure instinct that he only reached in lust and battle. He pushed himself against Loki with such force that they both toppled off the log and into a pile of leaves behind it. Thor laughed, before diving back in for another of Loki’s intense kisses. He did not think he would ever tire of them.
“Wait!” Loki commanded, pushing Thor off him and sitting up. His cheeks were flushed like on a hot day and he barely caught his breath, his long black hair full of leaves and his eyes grinning with devious delight. He looked so deliciously debauched that Thor could barely contain his desire to push him back on the ground and ravish him.
But then Thor followed Loki’s gaze to where Sleipnir was now standing, staring that them as though he had never seen them before. Thor momentarily debated - it was wrong to copulate in front of children, but not wrong to copulate in front of horses (Thor had done so more times than he could count). But then Thor looked into Sleipnir’s too intelligent eyes and sighed. “I remember long ago that father claimed we owed him a hundred years of interruptions. I think I know what he meant now,” Thor complained.
Loki pushed himself off the forest floor, daintily brushing the leaves from his pants and picking them out of his hair. “I think maybe I will join you in the palace tonight after all. Sleipnir will be able to entertain himself in the terrace garden for a little while.”
***
They decided that Loki should return to his horse form and both he and Sleipnir would accompany Thor up the narrow stone steps that lead to his private terrace garden. Thor and Loki had often used those steps as young men in order to come and go from the palace without their parent’s scrutiny. They knew that Heimdall was still watching, so it wasn’t true stealth, but it made them feel thrilled with their mischievous deception nonetheless.
Sleipnir seemed contented to play in the garden, especially entranced by the brightly colored fish that swam in the small pond. Thor pulled Loki down into his lap on a stone bench, kissing him deeply.
“When he goes to sleep, Thor,” Loki said with a husky whisper.
“I do not know how you manage such restraint,” Thor complained, knowing that his caresses and soft kisses were only making things worse. He could not seem to help himself.
“Yes, I suppose mental discipline was never a skill of yours,” Loki teased.
They let Sleipnir follow them into Thor’s rooms. Unlike many rooms in the palace, most of the floor was covered in soft fur rugs from Thor’s various hunts. It was so different than Loki’s rooms, which were stark and modern. Even his library appeared to be just a room with obsidian walls and a single blackwood desk. The many books were tucked away into a pocket of space at the back of the room that Loki opened by magic. Thor had never been inside, noting only that if Loki went to retrieve a book it looked like he stepped into darkness itself. Everything about Loki’s chambers screamed that he relied on magic and not the everyday conveniences utilized by most Aesir. Even the lights were glowing orbs that hovered in the air and only lit in Loki’s presence.
Thor’s rooms were lit with lamps and cluttered by comparison, filled with rich wooden shelves that housed a mix of weaponry, books, and other treasures discovered in quests. Unlike his parents, or Loki, Thor kept most of the gifts given to him by foreign dignitaries and grateful subjects. A diverse array of art and tapestries hung on his walls alongside decorative shields, pottery, weavings, and whatever else people saw fit to give him. What he couldn’t fit on his walls or on the single high shelf that ran close to the ceiling around the entirety of his rooms, he kept in an enchanted space like Loki’s library. Sif jokingly referred to it as his trophy room. Thor didn’t really care about all of the stuff or its absence, but it seemed rude to just get rid of it.
When previously Thor had felt comfortable amid the chaos, he now felt uneasy. Despite being infinitely more complex than a single room could be, nature felt simple in so many ways. No wonder Loki kept his rooms so free of clutter.
“It is not how I remember it,” Thor complained.
“I assure you, it is just as much a disaster as you left it. I pity the poor servants that come in here to clean.”
Thor shrugged. “They have cleaners that vanish the dust.”
“Ah, but in order to vanish the dust, the cleaning device must be able to see it. Imagine how many objects they must move to clean behind them.”
Thor felt suddenly guilty. “I did not know that.” He resolved, “if you come to stay here, I will move all of these objects to my ‘trophy room’ and we can decorate it more like yours.”
Loki sighed. “You still want that? This is new, Thor. Let us have a try before you make any grand declarations of affection.”
“I would declare right now that I . . .”
Loki pressed a finger to Thor’s lips. “Shhh. Don’t ruin the moment.”
Loki pushed Thor back onto the bed, straddling him and grabbing Thor’s hardness in a way that was more possessive than tender. Thor looked around for Sleipnir, but the horse had clearly lost interest with being inside and had returned to the garden. Thor noted that Loki must have magicked the door closed behind him.
Loki grinned, pushing Thor’s tunic off his shoulders and kissing down his abdomen. Thor sighed, running his fingers through Loki’s hair as he yanked open Thor’s trousers. Loki looked up through his long black lashes. In this moment, he seemed to be a creature of pure mischief, so smug with the way he teased Thor with his breath and his light touches - so close and yet denying Thor what he really wanted. Thor groaned, dropping his head back onto the pillow and fisting his fingers in the furs.
Thor did not know how long he allowed Loki to tease him, but enough was enough. He growled, hooking a leg over Loki’s and flipping them over, off the bed and onto the soft bearskin rug beside it. Loki huffed at the rough treatment, but neither of them was fragile.
Thor looked down into familiar green eyes, wondering how he could have possibly missed how beautiful Loki was for more than a thousand years. Loki did not have the muscle-bound physique of Thor’s typical conquest or the blond hair that was practically the standard of beauty in Asgard. But the way his pale skin contrasted with his dark hair and intense green eyes was exotic somehow. Then there were the high cheekbones and the delicate perfection of his musculature - not large, but well defined. Thor didn’t think he’d ever desired anyone more.
Thor ripped Loki’s dirty tunic away and pulled his pants down with one swift motion, following it with a searing kiss. They rutted up against each other like frantic beasts. Thor had done this many times with both men and women, but somehow the fact that it was Loki, with a year of magic and a millenium of history between them, lit a fire in Thor’s blood that he had not felt outside the heat of battle.
Of course that was when their mother walked in.
“Thor?” she called. “Heimdall tells me that you have finally returned to your chambers.”
Thor hastily pulled his tunic closed and tightened the fastening on his pants before standing up. He was incredibly relieved that they had fallen onto the opposite side of the bed from the door.
“Mother.”
Frigga frowned. “What are you doing down there?”
Thor shrugged, trying to look innocent. His mother surely did not want to know what he had been doing. “I am an adult, mother. You should not still be able to enter my chambers as you please.”
“Oh, Thor,” Frigga laughed, “to me, you will always be my little boy.”
Loki rolled his eyes from where he had moved to sit in an intricately carved chair by the wall. He had no doubt made himself invisible to Frigga.
“What brings you here, mother?” Thor asked. “I am tired from my journey with my friends and wish to rest.”
“It is the War Council. Tyr sends his summons for an emergency session.”
Thor nodded. “I will join them as soon as I have changed my clothes.”
Frigga smiled then, stepping forward to embrace her son. “I am happy you have returned to make the palace your home once again, Thor. It is difficult on a mother when both her sons leave her nest.”
“Do not fret, mother. I have returned and I hope Loki will do so as well.”
Loki scowled, but did not say anything. He did look fondly at their mother, however. Thor figured that Loki must have missed her as much as she missed him. Before he became mired in sympathy, Thor had to remind himself that Loki’s current exile was of his own choosing. He could freely return to court if only he admitted Sleipnir’s origins.
Frigga pulled back. “Tell me truly, my son. Do you know of Loki’s whereabouts? I do not need to see him if he does not wish it. I only want him to know that he has my love.”
Thor stared at Loki over Frigga’s shoulder. “I assure you mother, he already knows.”
But Frigga had never been one to be swayed by sentimentality. She smiled at Thor, but pressed on. “And I need to know that he is safe,” she added.
Thor clasped her hands, knowing that Loki would be angry with him later, but he couldn’t stand to let his mother worry. “I promise, mother. Loki is safe. He will return to us soon.”
Frigga’s smile was brilliant. She embraced Thor again, squeezing tight this time. When they were children, Frigga’s hugs had felt unshakable and all-encompassing. Her body surrounding Thor was a balm for any ill. But now, his mother’s love could not protect him from the world - not from Loki’s angry glare, or the trouble brewing in Jotunheim, or the dangerous passion she had interrupted.
Frigga planted a kiss on the top of Thor’s head, before clasping his hand. “Come, my son, we must find Tyr.”
***
Thor returned to his rooms angry. He slammed the door open hard enough to send a elven vase smashing to the ground. Thor ignored the pieces of broken ceramic and searched the room for Loki. The Jotun had refused the investigators’ demands to see King Laufey and now they were putting Thor in a position to look weak if he did not take some form of retribution. But the Jotun lived in barren world full of ice and dying things - how could Thor possibly punish them further without inciting a war? None of his council held the answer. The only good spot in all this was that now that she knew, it was Sif who suggested they leave the decision until morning, smirking knowingly at Thor the entire time. They both hoped that Loki had the answer because neither of them did.
But Loki was not in the chambers. Had he left? Thor panicked, rushing out onto the terrace garden. Sleipnir was sleeping beneath a tree, seeming to be unconcerned with Loki’s absence, so the prince could not have wandered far. Thor was about to head for the stone steps when he realized that there was only one place Loki could be (assuming he was not making himself invisible in order to taunt Thor).
Thor walked into his bathing room to find Loki kneeling in front of three candles. Thor admired the sleek lines of his naked back, the curve of his shoulder bones, the way his waist tapered, the luminous quality of his pale skin in the candlelight.
The washroom was the opposite of the rest of Thor’s dwelling. There was not a single extraneous item or a single item out of place. The walls were painted deep red, the color of dried blood. The floor was a dark, living stone cultivated on Alfheim which breathed in air and emitted heat, giving the stone beneath Thor’s feet a perpetual warmth. The bath itself was a sunken pool surrounded by a stone bench. Quite a few people could probably fit in the bath, but there was not enough room to swim. Hot water sluiced gently down one entire wall of the room and out over a ledge to create a small waterfall before tumbling into the main bath.
Loki did not turn at Thor’s entrance, but Thor had never once snuck up on him, so he knew his brother was aware of his presence. There was an enforced stillness to the room, a silence that spoke of ritual. Thor’s rant about the boldness of the Jotuns died on his lips. He pulled off his ceremonial armor with haste and left it outside the bathing room door before closing it.
Thor walked around Loki and kneeled facing him. Thor could tell by the selection of candles that this was a familiar ritual from their youth - a blessing for the brotherly bond to be performed each year on the day of the new year. Loki had since expressed his skepticism at such ‘superstitious nonsense,’ but if Loki wanted to bless their bond, then Thor would not argue, even if it was not the new year. When they were children, they would squirm at the silence required for this particular ritual, but now stillness came easily.
They focused their eyes on each other. Loki’s were soft with remembrance, his lips half smirking as usual. Loki waved his hand, setting a small reed on fire. Thor used the new magic Loki had taught him to light the other, almost jumping at the overzealous bonfire he created at the tip of the thing. Loki grinned at Thor’s clumsy magic but did not speak. He lit the candle on the right and Thor the one on the left. They then lit the center candle together. It was a special candle whose flame burned purple, spreading the scent of fresh pine throughout the bathing room.
They stood in unison, moving to the heated smokestone in the corner. A pitcher of water already waited there along with a small silver blade. It was flat and wide and intricate, looking more like a pennant or a letter holder with one end a triangle and the other as round as half a circle. Loki used it to poke a small hole in his thumb, dropping the blood into the golden pitcher. Thor did the same. The pinpricks healed almost instantly, but something in the blade always made Thor’s veins feel on fire, like ants crawling in his blood. Together they grasped the pitcher and doused the water over the smokestone. Steam billowed up from it, casting the room in a warm mist.
Next, they walked to separate sides of the bath and slid in. The bathwater was warm, not scalding hot as Thor preferred it. But Loki had never liked heat and Thor would not make him uncomfortable. Loki offered a small vial of sandalwood scented soap to Thor, who poured a small drop into his palms and worked it into a lather. He washed Loki’s hair and shoulders as required by the ritual, but this time instead of doing a haphazard, perfunctory job out of awkwardness, he messaged Loki’s scalp and shoulders, pulling Loki back against him until Loki was sitting on one of Thor’s thighs.
When Thor finished his ministrations, Loki turned around, straddling Thor on the bench and washing his hair in turn, his eyes never leaving Thor’s face. There was something undefinable in his expression, an amused contentment combined with something much darker, fatalistic.
When Loki finished, they stood together under the waterfall, letting it rinse the soap from their hair. They both ducked down under the surface of the water and were supposed to arise new men for a new year with all the strains of their brotherly bond repaired. Thor had always felt refreshed after the ritual, but this year, he felt powerful and peaceful at once, like he need only wish and his wants would materialize.
He pulled Loki to him under the artificial waterfall, devouring his mouth in a decidedly not-brotherly kiss. Loki returned the kiss, his fingers tangling in Thor’s hair. Thor pushed Loki back under the waterfall to the wall beneath the ledge and Loki wrapped his legs around Thor’s waist so that they rubbed against each other. Thor was used to deep grunts of passion, but Loki’s breath came in small panted moans, sometimes smothered by Thor’s lips on his.
Loki summoned a vial of oil and Thor used it to prepare him to an accompaniment of gasps and groans. Loki’s hands would no doubt leave bruises on Thor’s shoulders where he pulled him in closer, but Thor didn’t care. He had never wanted anything as much as he wanted to take Loki, to make him Thor’s in every way. Perhaps Loki was right and Thor did want control. But he didn’t want it for his own power or aggrandizement. He wanted it because without control, he could not keep Loki with him, writhing and moaning Thor’s name as he did now.
When the time came, and Thor was about to sink into Loki’s welcoming heat, Loki’s previously closed eyes opened and he whispered to Thor, “Please be careful.”
“Of course, I will always be careful with you,” Thor replied earnestly, laying delicate kisses on Loki’s collarbone to prove it.
“Oh, I prefer if you are not always careful with me. Only now is the first time since . . .” Loki could not say since he was violated by a horse. “It is the first time in a long time.”
Thor kissed him tenderly. “You need not worry, brother. I will take good care of you.”
Loki winced. “Grant me a favor, Thor: do not call me brother when we are like this.”
“Lover, then? Dearest? Heartsong?”
Loki rolled his eyes. “Call me Loki and I will call you . . .” his voice trailed off into a moan as Thor entered him.
“Yes, I should like if you call me that all the time,” Thor panted, trying to restrain himself from madly thrusting. Once Thor bottomed out, they both took a moment to catch their breaths. Thor did not need to ask, just look into Loki’s eyes to know that he could move now. Under the ledge, with the water sluicing down behind them, just skimming Thor’s back when he drew out of Loki before plunging back in again, it felt like their own private world, separated by a wall of water from the troubles of the kingdom and the trials of Thor’s rule.
The world narrowed until it was just Loki’s moans, the sound of water, the feeling of floating, and Thor chasing his climax like the greatest of all quests. Loki reached completion first, digging his fingers into Thor’s back and clenching around Thor with a strangled gasp. It did not take Thor much longer, only a few more hard thrusts and he was spilling himself inside Loki with a grunt. When pulled back, Loki’s skin was dripping with sweat and dewdrops of mist from the water and the smokestone.
He pressed one last kiss to Loki’s lips before sliding out of him and pulling him to sit between Thor’s legs on one of the benches while they both caught their breaths.
After a long moment, Loki pulled away and ducked under the water to wash off the sweat of their exertions and smooth back his hair.
Thor did the same before he pulled Loki back into his lap, wrapping him in a tight embrace and nuzzling his neck. “Why the Ritual of the Renewal of Brotherhood?”
Loki shrugged. “We missed it this past New Year.”
“We have missed it the past hundreds of years due to your skepticism. Have you had a change of heart?”
Loki shrugged. “No, just a sense of irony.”
“Say what you will, Loki, but I will continue to believe that our relationship has fallen into disrepair over the years we have neglected the ritual and now we are committed to repair the damage we have wrought in our neglect.”
“Superstition andsentiment, but I should expect no less from you, Thor.”
“Though I suppose I can appreciate the irony as well,” Thor added. “That last part of the ritual was less than brotherly.”
Loki laughed. “Indeed it was.”
As their bodies and the water around them cooled, the rest of the world returned. “Loki, King Laufey and his sons have left the palace. We know not where they have disappeared to and the frost giants will not tell us. We do not know what to do. You must come with me tomorrow to the Council and advise us. We will say you are weak from your travels so you might have excuse to return frequently to feed Sleipnir.”
Loki pulled out of Thor’s arms. For a second Thor worried that this would turn into another fight about Thor trying to control him, but Loki only looked defeated, not angry. “I can’t, Thor.”
“I promise that no one will discover Sleipnir’s origins.”
“It’s not that,” Loki replied. “Everything is so good, Thor. I have Sleipnir and you and our friends are treating me better than they ever have.” Thor grinned just at the fact that Loki called them ‘our’ friends. “This last year has stripped me of my defenses, Thor. I’m not ready to fact our mother’s concern and disapproval or the scorn and rumor of the Court. You told me to ask for what I need and you would grant it. Grant me just a little more of this peace.”
Loki sounded sincere, but then he often did when he was lying. In the end, Thor supposed it didn’t matter why Loki did not want to return. It only mattered that he did not. Thor kissed him. “I will, so long as you continue to advise me. But Loki, you must know that all things eventually come to an end. What was it that father always said about peace?”
“It is as impossible to maintain as the integrity of a soap bubble,” Loki supplied. “I will return when it is necessary, Thor, but no sooner.”
Next Chapter: Preemptive Strikes