Roo'verse Fic: Ever After
Title: Ever After
Author: Tzzzz
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: mpreg
Parings: John/Rodney, John/Cam
Spoilers: None
Summary: John forgets that it takes three to tango. Follows Tables Turned, Once There Was a Man Named Holland, Not a Henry, The Kangaroos and the Bees, What Rodney Wants, Conception, The Good of the One, Transferred, Baby Deedee, Brothers and Sisters, Dominus, Secundus, Pleb, and Fathers and Sons.
Ever After
John couldn't help but smile as they approached the house. It was the first time in years that he was actually looking forward to returning to his family home and a large part of that was the fact that Cam was waiting for him there. John couldn’t help but grin to himself. Cam would be so excited that now they could actually get married and be a real family. John admitted that he was also looking forward to finally getting to have sober sex with Cam. Hazy drunken memories and a child really weren’t all John would like to have of Cam.
John also smiled thinking about Jeannie and Rodney when he’d left them in Houston. After an exceedingly awkward reunion with their donor, in which Rodney introduced John as his fiancee, they swung back and forth between manic physics and shouted recriminations for an entire evening, but eventually Jeannie and Rodney had both come to realize that marrying their father simply hadn’t been an option for Hirsch. It wasn’t that he chose to reject them or their father, but rather that Andrew Hirsch had not had it in him to be their donor. To John, it seemed like a brave choice - for Hirsch to know himself well enough to realize that compromising would have lead to an unhappy family for all those involved. Rodney, with all of his abandonment issues, had not agreed. But slowly the shouting transformed from bitter and angry into the traditional McKay-family bickering. John didn’t doubt that Rodney and Jeannie would be fine.
After a tearful phone call from Jeannie, Cesan had flown down and they were all going to stay in Houston a few more days until the Registration ceremony. John was happy that Jeannie and Rodney’s parents also planned to attend. Dave might have a minor freak out about needing to add more names to the guest list at the last minute, but if he let himself get worked up over that kind of thing, he deserved it.
As much as John had absolutely loved coming like a noble several times a day while he and Rodney tried to conceive, John was equally looking forward to seeing Cam again and finally getting to sleep with him - sober, this time. John had been away for less than a week, but he had missed Cam terribly during that time. He knew a part of that was his hormones telling him that he needed to stay with his donor to give his child a pouchmate, but even after all the unprotected sex with Rodney, John still found himself thinking about Cam - wondering if he could help John defeat Rodney at Call of Duty or whether he was watching the UCLA game or what he would think about the many baby issues that John had been faced with on his trip. Between Rodney’s obsessive compulsive researching and Jeannie’s seemingly endless list of baby things they needed to pick up on Earth, John felt overwhelmed. He and Cam had been very good about keeping up with the incubation literature, but Cam was absolutely willing to indulge John’s procrastination on actually preparing for the baby to emerge.
As the car pulled up to the house, John looked around, but it was early morning and Dave and Alexi were at work and the kids at school. Darren might be around, but with the life of a musician it was always hard to know. John hoped that he’d see Cam first.
The Guild driver was good. He was already opening the door and offering John a hand before he'd even thought to get up. John waved him off, but didn't stop him in time to carry his own luggage. The driver only laughed, "I get the bags for all you noblemen, not just the ones carrying. Though, just to warn you, when you Register a child it all goes in your file, so all the Guild services you engage will know about your condition."
John shrugged, a little embarrassed. He hated the modern trend to treat incubating men more like pregnant women, who really could injure their children with heavy lifting. "Sorry."
"Your first?" the driver asked.
"Yeah," John acknowledged. "I feel great, though. I barely even feel the weight."
"Wait a few months," the driver replied with a laugh. "Still, I always wished my wife would be more like you noblemen. No late night cravings or mood swings."
"In a few months we'll see if the donor agrees." The both shared a chuckled and John made sure to tip well.
He left his bag on the front door for the staff to pick up and walked around the back to enter through the solarium. The back staircase (designed for servants when the house was built) was steep and narrow and John made his way slowly up, one hand on his belly. Just because Dane wasn't in a very delicate state didn't mean he was safe from John falling and squishing him. John had stayed up a few nights worrying about the possibility. Regardless of what he liked his colleagues to believe, John wasn't really the most graceful person.
John smiled when he made it all the way to their rooms without running into anyone. It was ridiculous in this monster of a house, but John almost felt like he was in their home in Colorado. Which was all rich wood and skylights and magazines and books strewn all over the place - the complete opposite of the minimalist modern design that Dave had chosen specifically because he knew John favored it. But what made this place feel like home was entering to find Cam in the bedroom, curled up on top of the sheets in his workout pants, an empty cereal bowl on the nightstand and ESPN blaring. John wondered how he’d managed to fight off the housekeeper to leave a bowl just sitting around like that. Cam looked young in his sleep, and the sunlight pouring in through the windows looked really good on him. In fact, an afternoon nap seemed like a good idea to John, so he slid off his shoes and shirt and lowered himself down beside Cam, leaning into his delicious warmth.
"John," Cam murmured, without waking up. He slung an arm across John automatically, making John smile.
It didn't take long for both of them to fall into a deep sleep.
***
John woke up to a hand rubbing soothing circles on his belly and Cam's whispered voice saying, "Deedee missed the two of you."
"Cam, 'm sleeping," John groaned, rolling over and away, but Cam's arm just reached around him, pulling John back against Cam's semi-hard cock.
John smiled. Now that he'd proved to Rodney that he was serious and wasn't just going to go running off with Cam, he could finally have this: Cameron Mitchell, sober. John smirked, rocking his hips subtly back against Cam's and guiding Cam's hands down from his belly to John's hardening cock.
"John?" Cam's firm grip on John's hard-on belied the uncertainty in his voice.
"Mmmm. Like that." John rocked harder, pushing his cock into Cam's fist. Cam's other hand stayed on John's stomach, fingering the pouch scar.
"I wanted this for so long," Cam whispered into John's neck, kissing him there and nibbling at John's earlobe as he thrust gently against John's ass and slid his hand below the elastic of John's sweatpants. "You have no idea how much it was driving me crazy sleeping in the same bed as you every night without doing this."
"Driving me crazy too," John gasped, arching into Cam's touch. "I have to carry around a baby for a year and I barely even remember conceiving him. Not fair."
Cam nipped at John's neck, stopping his thrusts to pull down John's pants and yank off his own shorts. "I'm going to really enjoy making new memories."
"Me too." John turned around and pulled Cam into a deep kiss like they'd only shared a handful of times. Cam was an amazing kisser, giving John's tongue the right amount of play, giving as good as he got. John pulled him closer, until Cam's hard stomach was touching John's pouch. Cam snaked a hand between them to brace the baby as he kissed and kissed and kissed John until they were both panting.
"In me," John whined, "now." He was aching again, rutting against Cam and wrapping a leg around him to keep up the delicious friction.
Cam chuckled. "Do you want me in you or do you want to keep going, because I can't grab a condom with you wrapped around me like that."
John whimpered his frustration but complied, stroking himself until Cam returned.
"You need lube?"
John shook his head. "I'm already wet for you."
"God that's hot." Cam lifted John up and shoved a pillow beneath his hips, kissing everywhere in the process - the bump where the baby rested, the sensitive insides of John's thighs, the tip of his cock, just enough to make John thrust up to meet him.
The sun was just starting to set, a golden light spilling through the windows, making everything glow. Cam looked radiant, haloed above John with such a look of care and devotion on his face that John could barely stand to look at him, it made him feel so raw with emotion.
But then Cam was pushing gently into him and John forgot about everything. Cam used those amazing biceps to keep his weight off John's belly as he thrust slowly into him. John felt like he was slowly unraveling with each gentle thrust. Somewhere deep beneath the constant buzz of pleasure, John was embarrassed by the little whining mews he was making, but then Cam would twist his hips just so and John would break the whimpers with a long moan. He reached out, ineffectually grasping and Cam and trying to pull him in. John wanted it harder and he wanted it faster and he wanted everything Cam could give him.
But Cam kept up his maddening pace, his hips interlocking perfectly with John's, hitting John's prostate every damn time.
"I love you," Cam chanted. "I love you, I love you, I love you." It was so corny and ineloquent that John almost laughed. But then he looked up at Cam's pale blue eyes and saw the truth of it - love burning so bright there that it almost looked like it hurt.
"I love you too," John replied. He really did love Cam, but he wondered what he looked like when he said it. He wondered if he could ever say it with such honest devotion.
But then Cam was leaning back, pulling John up until he was basically sitting in Cam's lap, while Cam continued to thrust up deep into him, burying his face in John's neck, trailing kisses down his collar bone and touching him everywhere. John felt simply overwhelmed by it all. Not only did Cameron Mitchell love him, but his hands on John's hips felt like a puzzle unfolding. John hadn't known it could be this good. He hadn't known that once he had this he wouldn’t want to give it up.
Cam braced John's back with one hand while the other came around to cup John's belly, reminding him who had put that little baby bump there and that he was damn proud of it even though John wouldn't count it as either of their finest moments. John buried his hands in Cam's hair, kissing him with sloppy desperation. He was so close, but each exquisite thrust just made him want this to last longer.
Then Cam leveraged John just so with a frantic, powerful thrust and before John knew it they were collapsing against each other. Cam moaned, sounding absolutely satisfied. He helped John to stiffly lie back against the bed. Cam moved to position himself in their ordinary cuddling and sleeping position - John curled on his side and Cam's arms around him, one hand always on John's curved belly. However, John had another idea. He turned towards Cam this time, throwing a leg over Cam's and resting his head on Cam's shoulder. Cam still didn't leave John's belly alone, but it felt good to turn into him for once and see the almost astonished affection in Cam's eyes. The sex had been as good as John had always suspected, but he hadn't anticipated that it would change anything between them. But now John saw how much Cam had been holding back before.
"Nap again?" John asked with an exaggerated yawn.
Cam chuckled but nodded, closing his eyes but not stopping
"I want to ask what the this means," Cam whispered, "but maybe I should just savor the moment."
"I slept with Rodney," John blurted out. He couldn't lie to Cam now. This wasn't a promise. It might be something, but now that he'd let Rodney take him he was no longer in a position to promise Cam anything.
"I know. And that's fine. Of course I want you all to myself, but I can’t blame you."
"No, Cam." John winced. "I slept with Rodney. No condom."
"You what?" Cam exclaimed, pushing John away for probably the first time ever.
John flushed a little. He probably should have told Cam this before seducing him. "You know McKay, he's really paranoid. He was worried that he couldn’t compete with the fact that we have a son together. And maybe it wasn't exactly well thought out, but if he and I have a baby too, then he'll stop being so jealous." Jealousy was one of the so-called "pleb values" that John disliked as much as his father.
"That's your solution!" Cam shouted. "John, only in your world does having another baby simplify things."
"I," John began, not really knowing how to explain himself, but seeing Cam so angry had put him off his game. "I was scared at first, but after this labor and feeling Dane inside me, I think I can want it again. Don't worry, Rodney wants to carry, so assuming I am gestating, the new baby and Dane can be pouchmates for a few months until I'm ready to wean Dane and then I'll transfer to Rodney."
Cam jumped out of the bed, pacing now, despite his nakedness. John missed his warmth instantly, but certainly wasn’t going to do anything as dumb as reach for him. Instead, he stood up, pulling the duvet around him and walking towards the sitting room. Cam pulled on his sweatpants and a t-shirt and joined him.
Cam looked determined, resigned. It was so different from Rodney’s look. While Cam looked stoic and almost twitchy, Rodney would have looked like the world was coming to an end, but he was going to kick it’s ass into stopping. “So where does this leave us?”
Wasn’t it obvious? If John were planning to leave Cam for Rodney, he wouldn’t have suddenly jumped him after months of celibacy. Sometimes John got really annoyed by Cam’s plebeian values. “At the Registration Ceremony, we’ll announce our marriage and our formal intent to take Rodney as a secundus. That will count as a marriage for Guild purposes, but I highly doubt that my father will pass up on the networking opportunity of a pleb-style marriage. Dave assures me that they’re ‘in vogue.’” John rolled his eyes at his brother’s obsession with the Style section, but Cam wasn’t smiling. He wasn’t even looking at John, just staring at the minibar as though it could provide him with the answer to some impossible question.
John frowned. “You said you would marry me if I wanted it.” Now John looked away, playing with the corner of the duvet instead of watching Cam’s reaction. “Is it my family? I know that Dave and Darren will be happy for us and my father will come around eventually. Only Alexi will object and I don’t give a flying fuck what he thinks and neither should you.”
Cam moved from his seat to the couch with John. His skin was peppered with goosebumps, but he didn’t shiver. He moved slowly, with the kind of absolutely controlled intent that John only ever really saw in soldiers. He was reminded, suddenly, that Cam was a dangerous man - someone who killed. John wasn’t afraid that Cam would hurt him, but he was absolutely terrified by the lack of expression on his face.
“John,” Cam’s voice was slow and his drawal had stopped sounding friendly, “I said I wanted to marry you. I never said I wanted to marry Rodney.”
“You will be marrying me! Rodney might be a little put out if you don’t want to have sex with him, but I’m okay being the anchor member of the marriage - like Dave.”
“John, I’ve spent some time with your brother now and a lot of time with Darren. You can’t convince me that they’re happier that way.”
Now John was really confused. Dave had a great marriage. Alexi was an ass, but he’d been married to Dave first so there wasn’t much to do about it. Taking a secundus had been the best decision Dave ever made. “What do you mean? Dave would be lost without Darren.”
Cam crossed his arms across his chest in a gesture that John thought could easily be either defensive or stern. “Just like you’d be lost without Rodney?”
“Yes,” John immediately replied, because of course he’d be lost without Rodney. “Wait, no! I’d be lost without you too!” John didn’t think that Cam needed to know that he’d been willing to give Cam up in order to appease Rodney.
Cam sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “John, I know that you want us both, but it’s not your choice to make. You want me to look at your brother’s example, but all his example tells me is that Dave and Darren would have been much happier without Alexi and in our case, I’m Alexi.”
“I wouldn’t be happier without you!” John protested. He loved Cam and he wanted Cam to be a part of their son’s life. John forced himself to his feet, grabbing onto Cam’s arm to emphasize his plea. “I wouldn’t propose this if I didn’t think it would be the best for all of us.”
Cam laughed, a choked, bitter laugh that John had never heard from him before. “Oh, John, what’s best for all of us isn’t what’s best for you. Don’t you think McKay would rather have you all to himself?”
John would protest, except they’d both know that it was a lie. Rodney was willing to tolerate Cam and he was willing to agree to marry them both because he didn’t think he had a shot at John alone. “But what about you?” John asked instead. “Wouldn’t you be happier to be married to both of us than to be by yourself?”
“Having you to myself isn’t an option.” Cam didn’t even bother to phrase it as a question.
“Well, it’s a little late for that.” There was, of course, a chance that John wasn’t carrying Rodney’s child yet, but even if he wasn’t, John couldn’t go back to Rodney and say that he’d changed his mind and didn’t want a baby with him after all. It would do more than break Rodney’s heart. It would break him - period. And John hadn’t been willing to marry Cam before, when he knew about the baby and a group marriage wasn’t on the table. In fact, he’d done the exact opposite of what someone who wanted to marry Cam would have done and fled straight into the arms of another lover. Even though John’s love for Cam had deepened in his time back on Earth, he still couldn’t picture a future with just him and Cam and no Rodney.
“Cam,” John licked his lips, forcing himself to pull down his shields and show Cam, for once, everything he was feeling. This vulnerability felt new and raw and John mourned the fact that if Cam said ‘no,’ then John would lose the one person in two galaxies that he could truly be this open with. “Cam, I want you both.”
Cam sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. His stance softened and he opened his arms to John, pulling him into a soft embrace. He kissed John’s temple softly. “Don’t make any announcements at the Registration ceremony. I need to think about this.”
John nodded, leaning into Cam, chasing his warmth as he pulled away.
TBC
Author: Tzzzz
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: mpreg
Parings: John/Rodney, John/Cam
Spoilers: None
Summary: John forgets that it takes three to tango. Follows Tables Turned, Once There Was a Man Named Holland, Not a Henry, The Kangaroos and the Bees, What Rodney Wants, Conception, The Good of the One, Transferred, Baby Deedee, Brothers and Sisters, Dominus, Secundus, Pleb, and Fathers and Sons.
Ever After
John couldn't help but smile as they approached the house. It was the first time in years that he was actually looking forward to returning to his family home and a large part of that was the fact that Cam was waiting for him there. John couldn’t help but grin to himself. Cam would be so excited that now they could actually get married and be a real family. John admitted that he was also looking forward to finally getting to have sober sex with Cam. Hazy drunken memories and a child really weren’t all John would like to have of Cam.
John also smiled thinking about Jeannie and Rodney when he’d left them in Houston. After an exceedingly awkward reunion with their donor, in which Rodney introduced John as his fiancee, they swung back and forth between manic physics and shouted recriminations for an entire evening, but eventually Jeannie and Rodney had both come to realize that marrying their father simply hadn’t been an option for Hirsch. It wasn’t that he chose to reject them or their father, but rather that Andrew Hirsch had not had it in him to be their donor. To John, it seemed like a brave choice - for Hirsch to know himself well enough to realize that compromising would have lead to an unhappy family for all those involved. Rodney, with all of his abandonment issues, had not agreed. But slowly the shouting transformed from bitter and angry into the traditional McKay-family bickering. John didn’t doubt that Rodney and Jeannie would be fine.
After a tearful phone call from Jeannie, Cesan had flown down and they were all going to stay in Houston a few more days until the Registration ceremony. John was happy that Jeannie and Rodney’s parents also planned to attend. Dave might have a minor freak out about needing to add more names to the guest list at the last minute, but if he let himself get worked up over that kind of thing, he deserved it.
As much as John had absolutely loved coming like a noble several times a day while he and Rodney tried to conceive, John was equally looking forward to seeing Cam again and finally getting to sleep with him - sober, this time. John had been away for less than a week, but he had missed Cam terribly during that time. He knew a part of that was his hormones telling him that he needed to stay with his donor to give his child a pouchmate, but even after all the unprotected sex with Rodney, John still found himself thinking about Cam - wondering if he could help John defeat Rodney at Call of Duty or whether he was watching the UCLA game or what he would think about the many baby issues that John had been faced with on his trip. Between Rodney’s obsessive compulsive researching and Jeannie’s seemingly endless list of baby things they needed to pick up on Earth, John felt overwhelmed. He and Cam had been very good about keeping up with the incubation literature, but Cam was absolutely willing to indulge John’s procrastination on actually preparing for the baby to emerge.
As the car pulled up to the house, John looked around, but it was early morning and Dave and Alexi were at work and the kids at school. Darren might be around, but with the life of a musician it was always hard to know. John hoped that he’d see Cam first.
The Guild driver was good. He was already opening the door and offering John a hand before he'd even thought to get up. John waved him off, but didn't stop him in time to carry his own luggage. The driver only laughed, "I get the bags for all you noblemen, not just the ones carrying. Though, just to warn you, when you Register a child it all goes in your file, so all the Guild services you engage will know about your condition."
John shrugged, a little embarrassed. He hated the modern trend to treat incubating men more like pregnant women, who really could injure their children with heavy lifting. "Sorry."
"Your first?" the driver asked.
"Yeah," John acknowledged. "I feel great, though. I barely even feel the weight."
"Wait a few months," the driver replied with a laugh. "Still, I always wished my wife would be more like you noblemen. No late night cravings or mood swings."
"In a few months we'll see if the donor agrees." The both shared a chuckled and John made sure to tip well.
He left his bag on the front door for the staff to pick up and walked around the back to enter through the solarium. The back staircase (designed for servants when the house was built) was steep and narrow and John made his way slowly up, one hand on his belly. Just because Dane wasn't in a very delicate state didn't mean he was safe from John falling and squishing him. John had stayed up a few nights worrying about the possibility. Regardless of what he liked his colleagues to believe, John wasn't really the most graceful person.
John smiled when he made it all the way to their rooms without running into anyone. It was ridiculous in this monster of a house, but John almost felt like he was in their home in Colorado. Which was all rich wood and skylights and magazines and books strewn all over the place - the complete opposite of the minimalist modern design that Dave had chosen specifically because he knew John favored it. But what made this place feel like home was entering to find Cam in the bedroom, curled up on top of the sheets in his workout pants, an empty cereal bowl on the nightstand and ESPN blaring. John wondered how he’d managed to fight off the housekeeper to leave a bowl just sitting around like that. Cam looked young in his sleep, and the sunlight pouring in through the windows looked really good on him. In fact, an afternoon nap seemed like a good idea to John, so he slid off his shoes and shirt and lowered himself down beside Cam, leaning into his delicious warmth.
"John," Cam murmured, without waking up. He slung an arm across John automatically, making John smile.
It didn't take long for both of them to fall into a deep sleep.
***
John woke up to a hand rubbing soothing circles on his belly and Cam's whispered voice saying, "Deedee missed the two of you."
"Cam, 'm sleeping," John groaned, rolling over and away, but Cam's arm just reached around him, pulling John back against Cam's semi-hard cock.
John smiled. Now that he'd proved to Rodney that he was serious and wasn't just going to go running off with Cam, he could finally have this: Cameron Mitchell, sober. John smirked, rocking his hips subtly back against Cam's and guiding Cam's hands down from his belly to John's hardening cock.
"John?" Cam's firm grip on John's hard-on belied the uncertainty in his voice.
"Mmmm. Like that." John rocked harder, pushing his cock into Cam's fist. Cam's other hand stayed on John's stomach, fingering the pouch scar.
"I wanted this for so long," Cam whispered into John's neck, kissing him there and nibbling at John's earlobe as he thrust gently against John's ass and slid his hand below the elastic of John's sweatpants. "You have no idea how much it was driving me crazy sleeping in the same bed as you every night without doing this."
"Driving me crazy too," John gasped, arching into Cam's touch. "I have to carry around a baby for a year and I barely even remember conceiving him. Not fair."
Cam nipped at John's neck, stopping his thrusts to pull down John's pants and yank off his own shorts. "I'm going to really enjoy making new memories."
"Me too." John turned around and pulled Cam into a deep kiss like they'd only shared a handful of times. Cam was an amazing kisser, giving John's tongue the right amount of play, giving as good as he got. John pulled him closer, until Cam's hard stomach was touching John's pouch. Cam snaked a hand between them to brace the baby as he kissed and kissed and kissed John until they were both panting.
"In me," John whined, "now." He was aching again, rutting against Cam and wrapping a leg around him to keep up the delicious friction.
Cam chuckled. "Do you want me in you or do you want to keep going, because I can't grab a condom with you wrapped around me like that."
John whimpered his frustration but complied, stroking himself until Cam returned.
"You need lube?"
John shook his head. "I'm already wet for you."
"God that's hot." Cam lifted John up and shoved a pillow beneath his hips, kissing everywhere in the process - the bump where the baby rested, the sensitive insides of John's thighs, the tip of his cock, just enough to make John thrust up to meet him.
The sun was just starting to set, a golden light spilling through the windows, making everything glow. Cam looked radiant, haloed above John with such a look of care and devotion on his face that John could barely stand to look at him, it made him feel so raw with emotion.
But then Cam was pushing gently into him and John forgot about everything. Cam used those amazing biceps to keep his weight off John's belly as he thrust slowly into him. John felt like he was slowly unraveling with each gentle thrust. Somewhere deep beneath the constant buzz of pleasure, John was embarrassed by the little whining mews he was making, but then Cam would twist his hips just so and John would break the whimpers with a long moan. He reached out, ineffectually grasping and Cam and trying to pull him in. John wanted it harder and he wanted it faster and he wanted everything Cam could give him.
But Cam kept up his maddening pace, his hips interlocking perfectly with John's, hitting John's prostate every damn time.
"I love you," Cam chanted. "I love you, I love you, I love you." It was so corny and ineloquent that John almost laughed. But then he looked up at Cam's pale blue eyes and saw the truth of it - love burning so bright there that it almost looked like it hurt.
"I love you too," John replied. He really did love Cam, but he wondered what he looked like when he said it. He wondered if he could ever say it with such honest devotion.
But then Cam was leaning back, pulling John up until he was basically sitting in Cam's lap, while Cam continued to thrust up deep into him, burying his face in John's neck, trailing kisses down his collar bone and touching him everywhere. John felt simply overwhelmed by it all. Not only did Cameron Mitchell love him, but his hands on John's hips felt like a puzzle unfolding. John hadn't known it could be this good. He hadn't known that once he had this he wouldn’t want to give it up.
Cam braced John's back with one hand while the other came around to cup John's belly, reminding him who had put that little baby bump there and that he was damn proud of it even though John wouldn't count it as either of their finest moments. John buried his hands in Cam's hair, kissing him with sloppy desperation. He was so close, but each exquisite thrust just made him want this to last longer.
Then Cam leveraged John just so with a frantic, powerful thrust and before John knew it they were collapsing against each other. Cam moaned, sounding absolutely satisfied. He helped John to stiffly lie back against the bed. Cam moved to position himself in their ordinary cuddling and sleeping position - John curled on his side and Cam's arms around him, one hand always on John's curved belly. However, John had another idea. He turned towards Cam this time, throwing a leg over Cam's and resting his head on Cam's shoulder. Cam still didn't leave John's belly alone, but it felt good to turn into him for once and see the almost astonished affection in Cam's eyes. The sex had been as good as John had always suspected, but he hadn't anticipated that it would change anything between them. But now John saw how much Cam had been holding back before.
"Nap again?" John asked with an exaggerated yawn.
Cam chuckled but nodded, closing his eyes but not stopping
"I want to ask what the this means," Cam whispered, "but maybe I should just savor the moment."
"I slept with Rodney," John blurted out. He couldn't lie to Cam now. This wasn't a promise. It might be something, but now that he'd let Rodney take him he was no longer in a position to promise Cam anything.
"I know. And that's fine. Of course I want you all to myself, but I can’t blame you."
"No, Cam." John winced. "I slept with Rodney. No condom."
"You what?" Cam exclaimed, pushing John away for probably the first time ever.
John flushed a little. He probably should have told Cam this before seducing him. "You know McKay, he's really paranoid. He was worried that he couldn’t compete with the fact that we have a son together. And maybe it wasn't exactly well thought out, but if he and I have a baby too, then he'll stop being so jealous." Jealousy was one of the so-called "pleb values" that John disliked as much as his father.
"That's your solution!" Cam shouted. "John, only in your world does having another baby simplify things."
"I," John began, not really knowing how to explain himself, but seeing Cam so angry had put him off his game. "I was scared at first, but after this labor and feeling Dane inside me, I think I can want it again. Don't worry, Rodney wants to carry, so assuming I am gestating, the new baby and Dane can be pouchmates for a few months until I'm ready to wean Dane and then I'll transfer to Rodney."
Cam jumped out of the bed, pacing now, despite his nakedness. John missed his warmth instantly, but certainly wasn’t going to do anything as dumb as reach for him. Instead, he stood up, pulling the duvet around him and walking towards the sitting room. Cam pulled on his sweatpants and a t-shirt and joined him.
Cam looked determined, resigned. It was so different from Rodney’s look. While Cam looked stoic and almost twitchy, Rodney would have looked like the world was coming to an end, but he was going to kick it’s ass into stopping. “So where does this leave us?”
Wasn’t it obvious? If John were planning to leave Cam for Rodney, he wouldn’t have suddenly jumped him after months of celibacy. Sometimes John got really annoyed by Cam’s plebeian values. “At the Registration Ceremony, we’ll announce our marriage and our formal intent to take Rodney as a secundus. That will count as a marriage for Guild purposes, but I highly doubt that my father will pass up on the networking opportunity of a pleb-style marriage. Dave assures me that they’re ‘in vogue.’” John rolled his eyes at his brother’s obsession with the Style section, but Cam wasn’t smiling. He wasn’t even looking at John, just staring at the minibar as though it could provide him with the answer to some impossible question.
John frowned. “You said you would marry me if I wanted it.” Now John looked away, playing with the corner of the duvet instead of watching Cam’s reaction. “Is it my family? I know that Dave and Darren will be happy for us and my father will come around eventually. Only Alexi will object and I don’t give a flying fuck what he thinks and neither should you.”
Cam moved from his seat to the couch with John. His skin was peppered with goosebumps, but he didn’t shiver. He moved slowly, with the kind of absolutely controlled intent that John only ever really saw in soldiers. He was reminded, suddenly, that Cam was a dangerous man - someone who killed. John wasn’t afraid that Cam would hurt him, but he was absolutely terrified by the lack of expression on his face.
“John,” Cam’s voice was slow and his drawal had stopped sounding friendly, “I said I wanted to marry you. I never said I wanted to marry Rodney.”
“You will be marrying me! Rodney might be a little put out if you don’t want to have sex with him, but I’m okay being the anchor member of the marriage - like Dave.”
“John, I’ve spent some time with your brother now and a lot of time with Darren. You can’t convince me that they’re happier that way.”
Now John was really confused. Dave had a great marriage. Alexi was an ass, but he’d been married to Dave first so there wasn’t much to do about it. Taking a secundus had been the best decision Dave ever made. “What do you mean? Dave would be lost without Darren.”
Cam crossed his arms across his chest in a gesture that John thought could easily be either defensive or stern. “Just like you’d be lost without Rodney?”
“Yes,” John immediately replied, because of course he’d be lost without Rodney. “Wait, no! I’d be lost without you too!” John didn’t think that Cam needed to know that he’d been willing to give Cam up in order to appease Rodney.
Cam sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “John, I know that you want us both, but it’s not your choice to make. You want me to look at your brother’s example, but all his example tells me is that Dave and Darren would have been much happier without Alexi and in our case, I’m Alexi.”
“I wouldn’t be happier without you!” John protested. He loved Cam and he wanted Cam to be a part of their son’s life. John forced himself to his feet, grabbing onto Cam’s arm to emphasize his plea. “I wouldn’t propose this if I didn’t think it would be the best for all of us.”
Cam laughed, a choked, bitter laugh that John had never heard from him before. “Oh, John, what’s best for all of us isn’t what’s best for you. Don’t you think McKay would rather have you all to himself?”
John would protest, except they’d both know that it was a lie. Rodney was willing to tolerate Cam and he was willing to agree to marry them both because he didn’t think he had a shot at John alone. “But what about you?” John asked instead. “Wouldn’t you be happier to be married to both of us than to be by yourself?”
“Having you to myself isn’t an option.” Cam didn’t even bother to phrase it as a question.
“Well, it’s a little late for that.” There was, of course, a chance that John wasn’t carrying Rodney’s child yet, but even if he wasn’t, John couldn’t go back to Rodney and say that he’d changed his mind and didn’t want a baby with him after all. It would do more than break Rodney’s heart. It would break him - period. And John hadn’t been willing to marry Cam before, when he knew about the baby and a group marriage wasn’t on the table. In fact, he’d done the exact opposite of what someone who wanted to marry Cam would have done and fled straight into the arms of another lover. Even though John’s love for Cam had deepened in his time back on Earth, he still couldn’t picture a future with just him and Cam and no Rodney.
“Cam,” John licked his lips, forcing himself to pull down his shields and show Cam, for once, everything he was feeling. This vulnerability felt new and raw and John mourned the fact that if Cam said ‘no,’ then John would lose the one person in two galaxies that he could truly be this open with. “Cam, I want you both.”
Cam sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. His stance softened and he opened his arms to John, pulling him into a soft embrace. He kissed John’s temple softly. “Don’t make any announcements at the Registration ceremony. I need to think about this.”
John nodded, leaning into Cam, chasing his warmth as he pulled away.
TBC