just felt like writing
ok, it's 1 am, lets see what comes to mind. I'm back into my karate after a short break of almost 1/3 of my life, a break of seven years. Some things change, some stay the same, but with the karate, it's something that makes me feel good. Im not too sure what else makes me feel *good* right now, but getting a bit more exercise, and returning to training is one thing. I can't say i had the best reasons for going back into karate. It was primarily done in order to escape from certain things going on in my personal life that need no more mentioning. It was done so that I could focus on something other than wearing a nice friendly mask. The good thing about wearing masks is that if you wear them for long enough, they become your face, and you stop needing to put on the mask, you wake up, and that is you.
Escapism... it's something i've always seemed to do. Role-playing is an escape from reality, to put your mind into a creative space where you are not yourself, where you play a character that has certain elements of yourself, but where many limitations of real life don't exist. I'm a generally non-confrontational person. If there is something i'd rather not see, it is often easy to turn your face away from it. If it's a deep-rooted problem, then you attack the roots, and solve it. Most things don't require it. Certain things are better not to be psycho-analysed, especially by one's self
What has changed in karate in the seven years i had off... they senior sensei for the region, the senseis at the different dojos, the students (karateka, not chanuchim as my brain just tried to convince me), the techinical aspects of many techniques and kata.
What hasn't changed... the basics. The fundamentals of karate are constant. The etiquette. Apparently my grade hasn't changed either. This surprised me when i returned, as i walked back in wearing a white belt. i was told in no uncertain terms in my second class that i wasn't to wear the white belt, and i should take up my old grade. This disagrees with me to a certain extent. I *used* to be a 3rd kyu brown belt. I used to train reasonably strongly, and was reasonably dedicated, and eventually earned my brown belt. I gave it up. Seven years. I didn't feel like a brown belt when i returned. I still don't feel like a brown belt, and it's been about 2 months since i started training again. I feel more comfortable that i was when i returned,but i am not comfortable. I would like to be comfortable. I would like to say that I felt like i should be a brown belt. What is more likely is that I will decide that when i feel like i deserve my brown belt, that i start comtemplating whether or not i want to grade. I can't grade at the moment, because i don't know the changes from the last 7 years.But i will eventually feel more comfortable, and will feel like I can do that.
Ok i've just noticed my eyes are starting to hurt slightly, so i am typing blind, i'm hoping that my touch typing skills are strong enough to type with my eyes closed. i would also like to take up teaching karate. This will involve getting more comfortable, and getting a driving license. it's something i need to do anyway, so no reason really to delay it.
Taking up teaching will involve being able to drive down to manakau, and train with the senseis on a wednesday night. My other problem. I want to keep some essence of my geekery in tact. I role-play on monday and wednesday nights and would like to keep at least 2 nights a week to be social and geek around with people. Tuesdays is america nights. the main reason i haven't done prepayed training for gkr is so if I should i have a hunger to take up rping on tuesday nights again, i can. But tuesday nights i have training with Senseis Chris, Cole & Sue, who all remember me from when i was training previously, and have all been great in encouraging me to get back into it.
I'm at the stage where i can comfortably walk in to karate in around an hour (it's a 5.9km walk according to wises), train for 2 1/2 hours, and then bus or train home. I am making a few typos, but checking every few lines to make sure whatever i am writing is making sense.
well... night, i'm sleepy
Escapism... it's something i've always seemed to do. Role-playing is an escape from reality, to put your mind into a creative space where you are not yourself, where you play a character that has certain elements of yourself, but where many limitations of real life don't exist. I'm a generally non-confrontational person. If there is something i'd rather not see, it is often easy to turn your face away from it. If it's a deep-rooted problem, then you attack the roots, and solve it. Most things don't require it. Certain things are better not to be psycho-analysed, especially by one's self
What has changed in karate in the seven years i had off... they senior sensei for the region, the senseis at the different dojos, the students (karateka, not chanuchim as my brain just tried to convince me), the techinical aspects of many techniques and kata.
What hasn't changed... the basics. The fundamentals of karate are constant. The etiquette. Apparently my grade hasn't changed either. This surprised me when i returned, as i walked back in wearing a white belt. i was told in no uncertain terms in my second class that i wasn't to wear the white belt, and i should take up my old grade. This disagrees with me to a certain extent. I *used* to be a 3rd kyu brown belt. I used to train reasonably strongly, and was reasonably dedicated, and eventually earned my brown belt. I gave it up. Seven years. I didn't feel like a brown belt when i returned. I still don't feel like a brown belt, and it's been about 2 months since i started training again. I feel more comfortable that i was when i returned,but i am not comfortable. I would like to be comfortable. I would like to say that I felt like i should be a brown belt. What is more likely is that I will decide that when i feel like i deserve my brown belt, that i start comtemplating whether or not i want to grade. I can't grade at the moment, because i don't know the changes from the last 7 years.But i will eventually feel more comfortable, and will feel like I can do that.
Ok i've just noticed my eyes are starting to hurt slightly, so i am typing blind, i'm hoping that my touch typing skills are strong enough to type with my eyes closed. i would also like to take up teaching karate. This will involve getting more comfortable, and getting a driving license. it's something i need to do anyway, so no reason really to delay it.
Taking up teaching will involve being able to drive down to manakau, and train with the senseis on a wednesday night. My other problem. I want to keep some essence of my geekery in tact. I role-play on monday and wednesday nights and would like to keep at least 2 nights a week to be social and geek around with people. Tuesdays is america nights. the main reason i haven't done prepayed training for gkr is so if I should i have a hunger to take up rping on tuesday nights again, i can. But tuesday nights i have training with Senseis Chris, Cole & Sue, who all remember me from when i was training previously, and have all been great in encouraging me to get back into it.
I'm at the stage where i can comfortably walk in to karate in around an hour (it's a 5.9km walk according to wises), train for 2 1/2 hours, and then bus or train home. I am making a few typos, but checking every few lines to make sure whatever i am writing is making sense.
well... night, i'm sleepy