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What do you do when everything that you have ever wanted falls into place. All the material things in the world that you have dreamed of obtaining are within your grasp. What do you do when you cannot find love because your heart has turned black and the only love you know is from friends and family. And, you cherish this love like no other enough
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first of all.. your not protecting him.. he has your mama to do that. If you were protecting him as much as you think, then you would be sitting by his side day in and day out. under your circumstances now, i understand that you cant do that. however you know damn well, that if he could stand there and look you in the face, he would say.. " i love you too. Now go"... i can't promise that what you seek will be found in Florida. I can't promise that it will be the best descision for you. Hell, this past year i began to think it was the worst decision i ever made, moving to FL... i was sooo damn happy with my life, i was miserable...and thats the god damn truth. after being back here in K.C. i now remember why i moved in the first place, i now know how to be myself, and ONLY myself... if you were to move to Florida, i can't promise you wont be miserable anymore, that is something that only YOU can figure out for yourself. the only way to figure that out, is of course.. if you were to move there.
Derrek, i love you from the bottom of my heart. I want you in Florida so goddamn bad i can taste it. but only you can take those first steps... only you can change your life. for the past 2 years now, youve been telling me your moving down there. everytime its been the same reason why you havent yet, "I have bills to pay here, then i can go"... hello????? thats why their called BILLS... you can pay them WHEREVER YOU ARE!!!!.. i know thats just your excuse because mentally your not ready to move.. i understand that... if thats the case, then quit bitchin about staying here.. you know what you've got to do in order to be happy.. so fucking do it. you have a wonderful job here.. i respect you for not quiting.. however if you truely believe FL is what will make you happy, then maybe you should consider quiting and starting at the bottom again and working your way up.. youve done it before, ive seen you do it.. youve just gotten lazy over the years cause now you got a kick ass job... *trust me i understand that one as well***
This is a really LONG comment, but i think this is what needed to be said.. once again Derrek, from the bottom of my empty heart, I Love You, Rob, Sarah and Mark Love You. We want you to move down there, but only when YOU are ready. you know what you have to do... Fuckin Do It.
*please dont get offended.. im just speakin my mind. i love u...
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