Play, hurt.
whoever thought that bringing food into the library right now was a good idea isn't nice. i mean the whole place smells like chicken now...at least i think its chicken but it might be macaroni, sometimes the two smell the same to me. sometimes everything smells the same just like how seeing people for the first time again can feel scary and make you shake and want more but you then realize its just not the day for that.
whenever there's a drastic shift in your life it leaves you there, alone, wondering what just happened and what exactly you are supposed to do about it. unfortunately this shift is happening in the midst of a fifteen page paper, and about half way through the american analog set, so now i can't even see straight.
what do you do when you are disappointed? do you think about it harder to make sure it is actually disappointment and not something else, or do you find some way to pull an Oprah and embrace it? It will pass in a while I'm sure. Maybe even after this paper comes to a completed state. I miss writing for the sake of writing, I can't find any inspiration in Victorian or Romantic literature, thats for sure. I'm just stalling now. Stalling to finish this paper, stalling to eat dinner, stalling to drive home, stalling to go home alone, stalling the sleep alone, in my freezing apartment that smells like old coffee, apples, that strange fake "christmas" scented candle, rabbit, dkny, and boots. I wonder if this is all its ever going to amount to. I think I'm thinking too much now.
Seriously, chicken? I guess there's a beer pong tournament in the downstairs hall...I like it up here though, the only lamp lit in a row of 10 tables and 18 lamps. That's about all the peace and quiet I need.
whenever there's a drastic shift in your life it leaves you there, alone, wondering what just happened and what exactly you are supposed to do about it. unfortunately this shift is happening in the midst of a fifteen page paper, and about half way through the american analog set, so now i can't even see straight.
what do you do when you are disappointed? do you think about it harder to make sure it is actually disappointment and not something else, or do you find some way to pull an Oprah and embrace it? It will pass in a while I'm sure. Maybe even after this paper comes to a completed state. I miss writing for the sake of writing, I can't find any inspiration in Victorian or Romantic literature, thats for sure. I'm just stalling now. Stalling to finish this paper, stalling to eat dinner, stalling to drive home, stalling to go home alone, stalling the sleep alone, in my freezing apartment that smells like old coffee, apples, that strange fake "christmas" scented candle, rabbit, dkny, and boots. I wonder if this is all its ever going to amount to. I think I'm thinking too much now.
Seriously, chicken? I guess there's a beer pong tournament in the downstairs hall...I like it up here though, the only lamp lit in a row of 10 tables and 18 lamps. That's about all the peace and quiet I need.