(no subject)
Most people I talk to lately are really complaining about now compared to earlier. I think a large part of it is that exams are soon and that for some of us *cough*, they will make us realize we know nothing. Mostly, people are missing their old marks. I agree. I miss my old marks too. But the things being worse part? I dunno. In so many ways they're better. And in other ways, it is worse. Certain elements like how much easier and less complicated everything was. I guess that's just a thing involved with coming of age and all that stuff. Other elements, like how I keep thinking that if I could go back into the past with the improvements that I've made on myself now, I could do so many things differently. I mean, practically everything would go far more smooth. I think that's the main way I've changed over this transition period of x amount of years, until we realize it's over. At that point, I expect things to get easier again, although I'm not sure why. If you look at things from a demographical point of view, we're all running out of time in ways. I know we're still young and all that, but pretty soon we're not gonna be able to say that with as much confidence as we do now. And even sooner after that, we won't be able to say it at all. What's after that? Get old and die? And if the one true plague of a question concerning the afterlife is false like no one wants it to be, I'll fade to black as I die. Never to feel anything again, see, touch, hear, smell, just nothing. What if that's what happens? What the hell are we gonna do then? What do you do when you know it's over in those last moments of your life? Do you think about the people you love and all that? Or do you think about how sad it is that there's a possibility that you won't be anything at all in just one more moment. How the hell is that supposed to make someone feel? At the same time, we can't go around dodging death for our whole lives. Now, you could say that you're gonna be the first living thing ever that will not die. The odds of that are so low that they really aren't possible conventionally. Maybe someday, but it won't be able to save any of us, that's for sure. What do we do with those moments we wasted? When you're too afraid to do something, when you hesitate even a litte. I've done a lot of hesitating, and I've done a lot of being do afraid to act. I don't want to waste another single moment of my life. If all we have is this time then I want to use every single possible moment of whatever time I have left. If I know that I couldn't have done it better, then just maybe I'll be a little more apprehensive when the worst moment of my life comes.
I really need something to help me stop thinking about this now, cause it's pretty damn depressing when you look at it that way.
I really need something to help me stop thinking about this now, cause it's pretty damn depressing when you look at it that way.