(no subject)
So many things in my life...
Camp reunion was on Saturday. It was amazing to be back and see everyone and drive up Camp Road and it felt like I had honestly never left. It not only validated my many years at camp but confirmed my decision to not return after Gadna summer. Nothing has changed, for good and bad. I'll probably visit Ian in a couple weeks for visiting day or see him on his days off. Camp has been such a big experience in my life that I'm glad I took a day to go back and visit.
Free tickets to Jack's Mannequin and The Fray this past Sunday. We had lawn seats that got upgraded to outdoor seats and we sat in the rain and danced and sang. At one point during The Fray, through a whole list of songs I had never heard, I started thinking about my life and how I got to where I am. I was standing in the rain and I felt every emotion imaginable run through me. And I felt alive and happy, and so sad and alone. I've been thriving off feeling independent the past few months. Independent from my parents and from Jordan and from boys in general. The song is called Never Say Never and I cried so hard because the independence I've been living off of crashed down and I just felt alone, hurt, and betrayed all over again. I haven't cried for months and probably won't for a few more. As soon as the song was over they played You Found Me and we sang so loud and I smiled so big and I felt like my life was mine again. I'm so happy that I'm on my own and living for myself, but it made me really question whether I would or could fall in love again.
I also had mono. I just got my blood work back today, although I got the test done weeks ago. I feel great and had truly thought I had only had a small flu. I had only missed a day of work and lost 5 pounds. All in all I'm glad I didn't get it nearly as bad as it could have been. I don't have time to be sick.
I hate the rain. It's rained for almost a week now and I'm sick of it. I've been running along the river and I couldn't yesterday because I felt so run down after work but I'm going out for a run momentarily. I almost need it at this point to feel good about my day. I love my mom and my dad. I've been talking to them almost every day. Through all the weird emotions of the past week, between camp and the concert, I know that I'm living my life the best I can. My application for Prague came in the mail today and I'm going to fill it out after dinner tonight. It feels so good to make things happen.
Camp reunion was on Saturday. It was amazing to be back and see everyone and drive up Camp Road and it felt like I had honestly never left. It not only validated my many years at camp but confirmed my decision to not return after Gadna summer. Nothing has changed, for good and bad. I'll probably visit Ian in a couple weeks for visiting day or see him on his days off. Camp has been such a big experience in my life that I'm glad I took a day to go back and visit.
Free tickets to Jack's Mannequin and The Fray this past Sunday. We had lawn seats that got upgraded to outdoor seats and we sat in the rain and danced and sang. At one point during The Fray, through a whole list of songs I had never heard, I started thinking about my life and how I got to where I am. I was standing in the rain and I felt every emotion imaginable run through me. And I felt alive and happy, and so sad and alone. I've been thriving off feeling independent the past few months. Independent from my parents and from Jordan and from boys in general. The song is called Never Say Never and I cried so hard because the independence I've been living off of crashed down and I just felt alone, hurt, and betrayed all over again. I haven't cried for months and probably won't for a few more. As soon as the song was over they played You Found Me and we sang so loud and I smiled so big and I felt like my life was mine again. I'm so happy that I'm on my own and living for myself, but it made me really question whether I would or could fall in love again.
I also had mono. I just got my blood work back today, although I got the test done weeks ago. I feel great and had truly thought I had only had a small flu. I had only missed a day of work and lost 5 pounds. All in all I'm glad I didn't get it nearly as bad as it could have been. I don't have time to be sick.
I hate the rain. It's rained for almost a week now and I'm sick of it. I've been running along the river and I couldn't yesterday because I felt so run down after work but I'm going out for a run momentarily. I almost need it at this point to feel good about my day. I love my mom and my dad. I've been talking to them almost every day. Through all the weird emotions of the past week, between camp and the concert, I know that I'm living my life the best I can. My application for Prague came in the mail today and I'm going to fill it out after dinner tonight. It feels so good to make things happen.