once upon a time i was actually a fic writer

[two_if_by_sea]

Sources show that I have not done this since 2007. IS THAT TRUE.

Drabble/Ficlet Meme

1. Fandom, pairing, word/phrase/sentence/prompt.
(1b. Origfic is also an option.)
2. Remember that it has been ages since I've been in any active fandoms; please do not expect recent canon.
3. ????
4. Profit.

Comments

Re: Five Ways Itsuki and Kyon Never Were 3/6?

[two_if_by_sea]

Despite the smile, for the first time since you've met him, he sounds serious, absolutely, deadly serious. It is the solemnity in the "you", the calm of the way he says "wanted", like he knows what want is, like he alone could tell you the meaning of your own existence. With his face turned towards the sky, it is like he is talking to God, and it makes you cold, right in the cavity of your chest, right in your heart.

"Don't be disgusting," you mutter.

"I'll try," he tells you, mildly so you know he is mocking you in that way he does, but the coldness is still there in your heart when he leaves you, a casual flick of his wrist as a wave goodbye.

3.
The fourteenth thousand, three hundred and second time they stargaze, Koizumi says without warning, "Although we might not know Suzumiya-san's inner desires, should we pry into her mind? For example, hug her from behind out of the blue or whisper I love you or something along those lines."

"Who would want to go on that suicide mission?" Kyon demands.

"There is no more suitable individual than you."

"I exercise veto power. Pass!" Kyon waves his hand as if Koizumi were an annoying insect that he's been trying to rid himself of all evening. Koizumi chuckles, but when the laughter dies down, the silence seems chillier than usual. How had he started to notice those little gradations of silence between him and Koizumi? Out of discomfort, he turns to Koizumi and elbows him. "Hey. Any other ideas?"

"I wonder," Koizumi breathes. He tenses his shoulders, like an athlete about to throw something very heavy. "How about this," he says, and the smile on his face, Kyon knows, though he doesn't know how he knows, is not quite right, but before Kyon can say anything, Koizumi moves behind Kyon, his arms suddenly warm and strong around Kyon's waist, and he says, "I'll wait for Suzumiya-san to wake up, and then in front of her, I'll hug you from behind out of the blue and--" lowering his voice, his mouth a mere inch away from Kyon's ear-- "whisper, 'I love you.'"

Kyon swallows. It is all so sudden, so unexpected, except-- his mind is in a daze. As if he were drunk, he sees the stars as a kind of funny, crazy, too bright spiral in the sky, and it all collapses into the single point where Koizumi is holding him. His mouth is parched, full of gravel and nails. He's surprised to hear himself saying numbly, "Pass."

"It's okay. I was joking," Koizumi whispers. "Just a joke. Sorry."

But Kyon knows: Koizumi's response was a little too quick. Koizumi's voice sounds just a little too genuine. Koizumi stays with his arms locked against Kyon's waist for a little too long. The bright moon that shone unabated from the melancholic night sky of summer stared at them both balefully, old and ancient and too many years older, and not for the first time but still, just as strongly, Kyon felt small and stupid and, worst of all, powerless.

*

The fourteenth thousand, three hundred and third time they stargaze, Haruhi and Asahina fall asleep, and Koizumi gazes at the other end of the cosmos through a telescope, and then, as if remembering somewhere he needed to be, excuses himself. He tells Nagato that she can keep the tripod if she would like, and she doesn't respond. He smiles. "Well," he says, "I'll take my leave now," and barely even glances in Kyon's direction with a quick nod of goodbye.

Kyon frowns. It's the deja vu, Kyon assures himself, that makes the whole exchange odd to him, but he feels deeply, all of a sudden, that something is missing. Something else should have happened. But what? And it was a stupid thought anyway, he tells himself. Every time the world was remade. This time didn't have to be the same as the last time. It was only-- only--

Like a sickness in the subconscious, he eventually decides, staring at the shadow of a petrified Nagato who faced the night sky. It wasn't really real, none of this ways, it was just this temporary thing while they waited for time to slide back in place.