(no subject)
ima cancer...
everything and everyone i touch gets hurt
im sick of this shit
im sick of waking up in the morning and not knowing if i wanna live or die
im sick of pretending to be happy when all i feel inside is self loathing
the people who truly care for me are dissapperaing one at a time.
i take responsability for it though
i push them away
i dont want to be cared about and loved
i want to be left alone by myself in my own pity
i hurt everyone and im sick of it
i dont push them away on purpose
im just used to taking care of myself
im afraid theyll see me for the pathetic little girl i am on the inside
curled up in a ball in the corner of the room
afraid to look up and meet their gaze.. afraid theyll know
A POEM:
i look into ur deep blue eyes and wonder what u see
do u see the beautiful person inside of me?
or can u tell that what u see is nothing but a lie,
a big brick wall around my heart to let no one inside.
need to stop the drugs
im caught up in a world where i dont belong
i like the high, the rush i get when i parachute an E
the anxiousness i get for it to hit me
the way it makes everything seem numbly happy
but i know im getting too caught up in it
stop.....
everything and everyone i touch gets hurt
im sick of this shit
im sick of waking up in the morning and not knowing if i wanna live or die
im sick of pretending to be happy when all i feel inside is self loathing
the people who truly care for me are dissapperaing one at a time.
i take responsability for it though
i push them away
i dont want to be cared about and loved
i want to be left alone by myself in my own pity
i hurt everyone and im sick of it
i dont push them away on purpose
im just used to taking care of myself
im afraid theyll see me for the pathetic little girl i am on the inside
curled up in a ball in the corner of the room
afraid to look up and meet their gaze.. afraid theyll know
A POEM:
i look into ur deep blue eyes and wonder what u see
do u see the beautiful person inside of me?
or can u tell that what u see is nothing but a lie,
a big brick wall around my heart to let no one inside.
need to stop the drugs
im caught up in a world where i dont belong
i like the high, the rush i get when i parachute an E
the anxiousness i get for it to hit me
the way it makes everything seem numbly happy
but i know im getting too caught up in it
stop.....