Taking a Ride on the 506.
Tonight packed a pretty big punch. Someone's pulse stopped in front of me.
I was on the streetcar home from work reading Harry Potter, when I heard this random snoring noise coming from the seat across from me. The man to his left started shaking him and yelling "John! John! Wake up!". He made those wierd snoring noises for the next few minutes while his brother got increasingly worried. The streetcar stopped and the brother asked someone, anyone, to call 911. A lady with blonde hair did, as well as the streetcar driver. A woman came up to John and started rubbing his sternum to wake him up, saying she was a nurse (but "just one that deals with babies"). He didn't wake up and she started yelling "I can't feel his pulse".
I stood there frozen. The whole time. I stood up out of my seat and didn't know what to do. The driver asked for people to help him bring the man to the floor and I helped as well as my tiny 5 feet could. I grabbed his right leg. I stood back as the nurse tried to do CPR. This man was massive. She asked if anyone else knew CPR.
I know CPR. I taught CPR. I know the counts and the rhythm and how to landmark. But when she asked, I was frozen. I couldn't think of anything. I was terrified. The nurse continued pumping at his chest and I kept thinking she was doing it wrong. There was someone at his head so I tried to tell her to make sure the airway was open. The man was foaming a bit at the mouth. I have never witnessed anything like that. I have never seen someone without a pulse that wasn't at a funeral.
Eventually the ambulance came. Cleared us all off the streetcar. I stood outside, called my dad in a daze and took a cab home. I guess i should have stayed, should I have? I didn't know what to do.
I let myself in the back. No one was home exept the dog and cat. I dropped my bag on the floor and something inside me snapped. I felt like I couldn't breathe and was gasping as I was bawling. Hyperventilating. I couldn't stop. I knew no one was home, so it didn't matter how loud i cried. I sat there on the floor and couldn't move. It was like I was having one of my panic attacks of the past. Except this time, I couldn't pick myself up off the floor. I kept thinking of Izzy from Grey's Anatomy and how she laid on the floor of her bathroom after Denny died.
I was on the streetcar home from work reading Harry Potter, when I heard this random snoring noise coming from the seat across from me. The man to his left started shaking him and yelling "John! John! Wake up!". He made those wierd snoring noises for the next few minutes while his brother got increasingly worried. The streetcar stopped and the brother asked someone, anyone, to call 911. A lady with blonde hair did, as well as the streetcar driver. A woman came up to John and started rubbing his sternum to wake him up, saying she was a nurse (but "just one that deals with babies"). He didn't wake up and she started yelling "I can't feel his pulse".
I stood there frozen. The whole time. I stood up out of my seat and didn't know what to do. The driver asked for people to help him bring the man to the floor and I helped as well as my tiny 5 feet could. I grabbed his right leg. I stood back as the nurse tried to do CPR. This man was massive. She asked if anyone else knew CPR.
I know CPR. I taught CPR. I know the counts and the rhythm and how to landmark. But when she asked, I was frozen. I couldn't think of anything. I was terrified. The nurse continued pumping at his chest and I kept thinking she was doing it wrong. There was someone at his head so I tried to tell her to make sure the airway was open. The man was foaming a bit at the mouth. I have never witnessed anything like that. I have never seen someone without a pulse that wasn't at a funeral.
Eventually the ambulance came. Cleared us all off the streetcar. I stood outside, called my dad in a daze and took a cab home. I guess i should have stayed, should I have? I didn't know what to do.
I let myself in the back. No one was home exept the dog and cat. I dropped my bag on the floor and something inside me snapped. I felt like I couldn't breathe and was gasping as I was bawling. Hyperventilating. I couldn't stop. I knew no one was home, so it didn't matter how loud i cried. I sat there on the floor and couldn't move. It was like I was having one of my panic attacks of the past. Except this time, I couldn't pick myself up off the floor. I kept thinking of Izzy from Grey's Anatomy and how she laid on the floor of her bathroom after Denny died.