A random entry turned into random whining/ pity entry
yes
i realized i haven't updated in a while but honestly there is nothing
to update about.....lately one of the main things on my mind is when i
get to leave this house and not have to answer to these people
anymore......there is just something in the back of my mind that's
bothering me but i refuse to talk about it....i realized that that is
why i have been on edge lately, i have never been so moody in my
life.....i hate this whole being "fake depressed" but i can't help it
because there is nothing i can do about it. and damn it this was not
ment to be a whining session. I'm also a little tired of being
the only one who is expected to be happy all the time, apparently i am
so privilaged that i have no right to ever be unhappy which just makes
things worse. So i guess i would like to officially apologize to all
the people i piss off by being sad/angry/frustrated and just being
generally upset, even though most of them don't read my lj. So im
sorry and i will try my best to go back to being the same happy person
who spends all of her time cheering up everyone around her. I also
didn't write this for pity, i don't want it. i really don't mind.
I don't mind helping other people and always being happy for others,
really i don't i just needed to get that out of my system, cause lately
i have been moody. So no comments about how sorry you are for me
cause i know that no one who reads this would ever do anything to
bother or hurt me. So i guess i have to add that this entry is
not trying to blame anyone just a little venting that's all so really
no pity comments.