Flicks I've Seen In August
The Science Of Sleep (2006)
Would-be artist has way-trippy dreams, when not working his boring-ass job or trying to woo his similarly artistically-minded neighbour. And that's pretty much the gist of it - but it's a beautiful, bursting-with-imagination slice of crazy-ol'-French-craziness. Another fine notch in Michael Gondry's particularly fine belt.
Coming To America (1988)
Very funny, if almost ridiculously sweet-natured, Eddie Murphy flick.
Man On Fire (2004)
Freakin' awesome! Morally ambiguous revenge-laden bone-crackin' ass-kickin' action flick, with Denzel Washington on top-form trying to save and/or avenge a ridiculously cute little girl. It could only be Tony Mother FUcking Scott.
Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde (2003)
Absolutely and hopelessly dire. Reese Witherspoon marches on Washington to change the law on animal testing, and finds doormen who have nothing better to do than to spend all their time working on her campaign for her and senators who just need a quick freakin' pedicure to change their minds. In one particularly appaling scene, Reese talks to the supreme court one by one, asking "don't you love _insert name of your dog here_?". Instead of being busted for contempt of court, or otherwise kicked out for such ludicrous and manipulate shenanigans, everyone bursts into tears and proclaims her exactly right!
Meanwhile she marries the overly-supportive Luke Wilson or Luke Perry, or some fucker. You'll be hard pressed to give a shit though. None of which would matter if the flick was funny, but it just really isn't. So, dud of the month, blah-di-blah.
Mallrats [Extended] (1995)
The alternate cut from the 10th anniversary edition of the disc. "The Cut That Never Should Have Been, But Is, Because What The Heck" as Kevin Smith himself put it. Basically a chance to have a sneak peek at what the film was like before any cuts were made to what was written on the page.
A great time then, for big ol' Kevin Smith fans like myself. And indeed better than the theatrical cut in one or two little ways, sort of. Still, the original's where it's at, which is only as it should be.
The Blob (1958)
Steve McQueen - while chasing a shooting star - finds a guy with a weird blob on his hand. Promptly drops him off at the doctors, and goes drag-racing. And that's where it should have ended if only The Blob Didn't Keep Getting Bigger And Bigger AND DEVOURING HUMANS WHOLE. Proper excellent flick with one Hell of a rib-tickling finale.
Deep Star Six (1989)
So-so monster movie from original Friday The 13th director. The monster itself does look the shit when it's finally let out of the bag, and there's a great sucker-punch around the finale - but that's about your lot.
Dude, Where's My Car? (2000)
2nd viewing
Sort of like The Big Lebowski - if it wasn't fiercely intelligent, didn't boast sharply drawn characters and was, y'know, a dumb-ass teen comedy. Generally chucklesome, and with a couple of sound belly laughs - a mostly sound comedy, then.
Big Nothing (2006)
In which Simon Pegg (Funniest Man In The World Today contender) befriends David Schwimmer (Ross from Friends) at a call centre, and invites him into a scheme to blackmail a kiddie-porn lovin' priest. It's one of them Very Bad Things-sorta flicks then - with our schemers dragged through seven shades of shit as fate deals them worse and worse hands and the plan gets more and more convoluted.
It's sharp though, and a fuck-off good ride. The ending wasn't entirely satisfying - but when is it ever, with flicks like this one? - but it's a sound ride, and Simon Pegg makes like a small-time Tyler Durden. Recommended, then.
Creep (2005)
Girl gets stuck in the London underground, between parties, only to discover she ISN'T ALONE. A fine British horror flick, with some great supporting characters and some proper creepy bits.
Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)
Jack Lemmon and Al Pacino are both particularly brilliant in this extraordinarly casted all-nighter talk-a-thon where not so much actually happens, but characters and ways of life are cut wide open. And that's all you need to know. Coffee is for closers. Gem of the month, snickety snitch!
Full Metal Jacket (1987)
xth viewing
Which just gets more and more perfect every time. The drill seargent's admiration for Oswald's shooting JFK ("a moving target", we're reminded), the "all I ever ask of my troops is that they obey my orders as they would the word of God", and fuck, just the whole thing, let's be fair. If anyone reading hasn't seen it yet, they'd be doing me a personal favour to check it out for themselves.
Lolita (1962)
2nd viewing
Kubrick again! With another brilliant film! Pitch-black comedy and a cracking, human story. Sellers and the main chap are both bang on - as is the titular strumpet, I should add.
The Wicker Man (1973)
2nd viewing
Which I had the good fortune to see at the cinema, by Gods! An amazing film - too fascinating to really be 'scary' - as paganism and Christianity fiercely clash their horns, and Christopher Lee gets to grin away while proudly proclaiming certain theories popular among Nietczhe (and Trent Reznor). Great songs, too! A bit of a 30-year precursor to The League Of Gentlemen, in its way. Amazing flick, anyway.
Monty Python's The Meaning Of Life (1983)
xth viewing
Very funny, astute, spiritual and musical exploration of the whole life-meaning thingamy. Food for thought, and mucho laughter.
Knocked Up (2007)
Like it's predecessor, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Knocked Up is an absolutely hilarious rom-com, with real heart and very real, sharply drawn characters. Again, like T F-Y-O V, its title betrays its own sweet-heartedness, though it is the kind of - realistic - sweet-heartedness, where every couple needs a blazing row now and again. (Quote: "I know this isn't you, it's your hormones talking, but I just gotta say: Fuck you, hormones! You're a crazy fucking bitch, hormones!"). My favourite film of the year, thus far.
Would-be artist has way-trippy dreams, when not working his boring-ass job or trying to woo his similarly artistically-minded neighbour. And that's pretty much the gist of it - but it's a beautiful, bursting-with-imagination slice of crazy-ol'-French-craziness. Another fine notch in Michael Gondry's particularly fine belt.
Coming To America (1988)
Very funny, if almost ridiculously sweet-natured, Eddie Murphy flick.
Man On Fire (2004)
Freakin' awesome! Morally ambiguous revenge-laden bone-crackin' ass-kickin' action flick, with Denzel Washington on top-form trying to save and/or avenge a ridiculously cute little girl. It could only be Tony Mother FUcking Scott.
Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde (2003)
Absolutely and hopelessly dire. Reese Witherspoon marches on Washington to change the law on animal testing, and finds doormen who have nothing better to do than to spend all their time working on her campaign for her and senators who just need a quick freakin' pedicure to change their minds. In one particularly appaling scene, Reese talks to the supreme court one by one, asking "don't you love _insert name of your dog here_?". Instead of being busted for contempt of court, or otherwise kicked out for such ludicrous and manipulate shenanigans, everyone bursts into tears and proclaims her exactly right!
Meanwhile she marries the overly-supportive Luke Wilson or Luke Perry, or some fucker. You'll be hard pressed to give a shit though. None of which would matter if the flick was funny, but it just really isn't. So, dud of the month, blah-di-blah.
Mallrats [Extended] (1995)
The alternate cut from the 10th anniversary edition of the disc. "The Cut That Never Should Have Been, But Is, Because What The Heck" as Kevin Smith himself put it. Basically a chance to have a sneak peek at what the film was like before any cuts were made to what was written on the page.
A great time then, for big ol' Kevin Smith fans like myself. And indeed better than the theatrical cut in one or two little ways, sort of. Still, the original's where it's at, which is only as it should be.
The Blob (1958)
Steve McQueen - while chasing a shooting star - finds a guy with a weird blob on his hand. Promptly drops him off at the doctors, and goes drag-racing. And that's where it should have ended if only The Blob Didn't Keep Getting Bigger And Bigger AND DEVOURING HUMANS WHOLE. Proper excellent flick with one Hell of a rib-tickling finale.
Deep Star Six (1989)
So-so monster movie from original Friday The 13th director. The monster itself does look the shit when it's finally let out of the bag, and there's a great sucker-punch around the finale - but that's about your lot.
Dude, Where's My Car? (2000)
2nd viewing
Sort of like The Big Lebowski - if it wasn't fiercely intelligent, didn't boast sharply drawn characters and was, y'know, a dumb-ass teen comedy. Generally chucklesome, and with a couple of sound belly laughs - a mostly sound comedy, then.
Big Nothing (2006)
In which Simon Pegg (Funniest Man In The World Today contender) befriends David Schwimmer (Ross from Friends) at a call centre, and invites him into a scheme to blackmail a kiddie-porn lovin' priest. It's one of them Very Bad Things-sorta flicks then - with our schemers dragged through seven shades of shit as fate deals them worse and worse hands and the plan gets more and more convoluted.
It's sharp though, and a fuck-off good ride. The ending wasn't entirely satisfying - but when is it ever, with flicks like this one? - but it's a sound ride, and Simon Pegg makes like a small-time Tyler Durden. Recommended, then.
Creep (2005)
Girl gets stuck in the London underground, between parties, only to discover she ISN'T ALONE. A fine British horror flick, with some great supporting characters and some proper creepy bits.
Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)
Jack Lemmon and Al Pacino are both particularly brilliant in this extraordinarly casted all-nighter talk-a-thon where not so much actually happens, but characters and ways of life are cut wide open. And that's all you need to know. Coffee is for closers. Gem of the month, snickety snitch!
Full Metal Jacket (1987)
xth viewing
Which just gets more and more perfect every time. The drill seargent's admiration for Oswald's shooting JFK ("a moving target", we're reminded), the "all I ever ask of my troops is that they obey my orders as they would the word of God", and fuck, just the whole thing, let's be fair. If anyone reading hasn't seen it yet, they'd be doing me a personal favour to check it out for themselves.
Lolita (1962)
2nd viewing
Kubrick again! With another brilliant film! Pitch-black comedy and a cracking, human story. Sellers and the main chap are both bang on - as is the titular strumpet, I should add.
The Wicker Man (1973)
2nd viewing
Which I had the good fortune to see at the cinema, by Gods! An amazing film - too fascinating to really be 'scary' - as paganism and Christianity fiercely clash their horns, and Christopher Lee gets to grin away while proudly proclaiming certain theories popular among Nietczhe (and Trent Reznor). Great songs, too! A bit of a 30-year precursor to The League Of Gentlemen, in its way. Amazing flick, anyway.
Monty Python's The Meaning Of Life (1983)
xth viewing
Very funny, astute, spiritual and musical exploration of the whole life-meaning thingamy. Food for thought, and mucho laughter.
Knocked Up (2007)
Like it's predecessor, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Knocked Up is an absolutely hilarious rom-com, with real heart and very real, sharply drawn characters. Again, like T F-Y-O V, its title betrays its own sweet-heartedness, though it is the kind of - realistic - sweet-heartedness, where every couple needs a blazing row now and again. (Quote: "I know this isn't you, it's your hormones talking, but I just gotta say: Fuck you, hormones! You're a crazy fucking bitch, hormones!"). My favourite film of the year, thus far.