Aug 19, 2019 - The Match-up (FR-13)
Aug 19, 2019 - The Match-up (FR-13)
Author: mmooch
Summary: **Part of the 2019 LiveJournal’s Twisted Shorts FaD** challenge. When two teams collide.
Crossover: NCIS
Rating: FR-13
Word count: 421
Timeline: post-series for BtVS, before Ziva left for NCIS
A/N: Still not feeling great
Disclaimer: BtVS/AtS characters belong to Joss Whedon/Mutant Enemy. NCIS characters belong to Donald Bellisario, Don McGill and CBS Paramount Television. I claim no rights to any copyrighted material. Please do not copy or take this story without my permission.
Gibbs’ living room
“Well, sure…when it comes to craftsmanship, hand tools are far superior to power. Getting details just right requires a more hands-on approach.” Xander concurred between bites of his steak. “But when speed matters - like it usually does for me…and woodworking - power tools rule. When I have to repair half a living room and the furniture in it, I need more power…argh, argh, argh!” he finished with a grunt, quickly clarifying the speed issue.
Gibbs pointed his knife with a piece of steak at the tip towards the younger carpenter. Xander was tempted to snatch it, but kind was afraid of the retired Marine. “I can show you some tricks to strengthen your work. That way you can go longer between repairs.”
“What’s the biggest thing you’ve ever made?” Xander asked.
Without hesitation, Gibbs replied, “My boats. You?”
“A training closet for the Buffster.” At the raised eyebrow, Xander explained, “One of my many nicknames for Buffy.”
Across the room, said Buffster was standing near Director Vance, watching the pair. “How long can they talk about wood?” she asked.
“I’m just impressed Gibbs is using full sentences,” the director answered. “You think your friend could find out how Gibbs gets those damn boats out of the basement?”
She looked sorrowful and replied, “Even if he did, he wouldn’t tell anyone. He’d call it the code of the woodworker or something. He’s weird that way.”
Vance scanned the rest of the room, looking at the various pairings and inquired, “Which group worries you the most?”
Buffy answered without thinking too much, “Andrew and Tim would nerd-talk you until you were uncomfortable enough to move on, but they could do some damage if they needed to. Giles and Ducky would put you to sleep with their lectures, but they have done some damage in their pasts. Ziva and Faith can kill you the horrible way or the way you’d die with a smile on your face. Gibbs, Xander and Tony are sort of wildcards; you think you know how they’d come at you, but then they’d mix it up on you. Hands down, though, it would be Willow and Abby. They may look cute and harmless, but they’ve got ways of disposing of you that would give terrorists nightmares.”
“What about us?” Vance asked somewhat bemused. Not that he necessarily disagreed with her, although he could have gone without hearing that about Ziva.
She smirked at him and said, “We’d set the rest of them on whatever idiot pissed us off.”
A/N: I wanted the talk between Xander and Gibbs, but it wasn’t long enough to stand on its own.
Author: mmooch
Summary: **Part of the 2019 LiveJournal’s Twisted Shorts FaD** challenge. When two teams collide.
Crossover: NCIS
Rating: FR-13
Word count: 421
Timeline: post-series for BtVS, before Ziva left for NCIS
A/N: Still not feeling great
Disclaimer: BtVS/AtS characters belong to Joss Whedon/Mutant Enemy. NCIS characters belong to Donald Bellisario, Don McGill and CBS Paramount Television. I claim no rights to any copyrighted material. Please do not copy or take this story without my permission.
Gibbs’ living room
“Well, sure…when it comes to craftsmanship, hand tools are far superior to power. Getting details just right requires a more hands-on approach.” Xander concurred between bites of his steak. “But when speed matters - like it usually does for me…and woodworking - power tools rule. When I have to repair half a living room and the furniture in it, I need more power…argh, argh, argh!” he finished with a grunt, quickly clarifying the speed issue.
Gibbs pointed his knife with a piece of steak at the tip towards the younger carpenter. Xander was tempted to snatch it, but kind was afraid of the retired Marine. “I can show you some tricks to strengthen your work. That way you can go longer between repairs.”
“What’s the biggest thing you’ve ever made?” Xander asked.
Without hesitation, Gibbs replied, “My boats. You?”
“A training closet for the Buffster.” At the raised eyebrow, Xander explained, “One of my many nicknames for Buffy.”
Across the room, said Buffster was standing near Director Vance, watching the pair. “How long can they talk about wood?” she asked.
“I’m just impressed Gibbs is using full sentences,” the director answered. “You think your friend could find out how Gibbs gets those damn boats out of the basement?”
She looked sorrowful and replied, “Even if he did, he wouldn’t tell anyone. He’d call it the code of the woodworker or something. He’s weird that way.”
Vance scanned the rest of the room, looking at the various pairings and inquired, “Which group worries you the most?”
Buffy answered without thinking too much, “Andrew and Tim would nerd-talk you until you were uncomfortable enough to move on, but they could do some damage if they needed to. Giles and Ducky would put you to sleep with their lectures, but they have done some damage in their pasts. Ziva and Faith can kill you the horrible way or the way you’d die with a smile on your face. Gibbs, Xander and Tony are sort of wildcards; you think you know how they’d come at you, but then they’d mix it up on you. Hands down, though, it would be Willow and Abby. They may look cute and harmless, but they’ve got ways of disposing of you that would give terrorists nightmares.”
“What about us?” Vance asked somewhat bemused. Not that he necessarily disagreed with her, although he could have gone without hearing that about Ziva.
She smirked at him and said, “We’d set the rest of them on whatever idiot pissed us off.”
A/N: I wanted the talk between Xander and Gibbs, but it wasn’t long enough to stand on its own.