Accomplishments.. Thank You 2003 :)
Going to Una in a short while. I'm really looking forward to this. The feeling I'm having right now is just proof of how much I've grown this year. Had this been last year I would be all nervous stumbling around like some weirdo feeling sick and nauseus and wanting to bail out on the whole thing because I would feel like I wouldn't fit it. Things have changed. I'm looking forward to this. It's such a great feeling, I feel like a whole person.
I still struggle with a lot of fears. Crazy fears.
I don't call people unless I feel safe doing so or the person is expecting my call. I really hate phone calls.
When going places I don't like being on my own, especially if I'm meeting with people, or might meet people I don't really know.
I hate asking for things in stores. I avoid it by not asking and not getting what I wanted to get ._.
I'm still mortally scared by scary movies XD But uhm that's actually a bit funny :P
I never talk in class >.< wounding my oral grades and making my grade average go down >.< I need to get past this thing. Can't be so damn shy and protective all the time.
Things I have gotten over the last year:
I'm no longer scared to travel by train, bus or subway by myself ^^ I know that sounds retarded, but I really couldn't get on a train, bus or anything like that by myself without vomiting or getting real close to doing so before this year.. wai.. glad I got over that ^^
I'm not all inside of myself when facing large crowds of people. I even talk a bit now :)
I'm still a nervous little poor thing, but I'm getting better ^^ I feel like re-typing this entry as it really expresses my thoughts about the year.
But I won't ;)
I'll enjoy this new years. I really will. Sad to see 2003 go. With all the things it taught me I will miss it. The person I'll miss most today is Christian, but as he is in Japan having what I believe must be the time of his life right now I'll just be happy too ^^
I still struggle with a lot of fears. Crazy fears.
I don't call people unless I feel safe doing so or the person is expecting my call. I really hate phone calls.
When going places I don't like being on my own, especially if I'm meeting with people, or might meet people I don't really know.
I hate asking for things in stores. I avoid it by not asking and not getting what I wanted to get ._.
I'm still mortally scared by scary movies XD But uhm that's actually a bit funny :P
I never talk in class >.< wounding my oral grades and making my grade average go down >.< I need to get past this thing. Can't be so damn shy and protective all the time.
Things I have gotten over the last year:
I'm no longer scared to travel by train, bus or subway by myself ^^ I know that sounds retarded, but I really couldn't get on a train, bus or anything like that by myself without vomiting or getting real close to doing so before this year.. wai.. glad I got over that ^^
I'm not all inside of myself when facing large crowds of people. I even talk a bit now :)
I'm still a nervous little poor thing, but I'm getting better ^^ I feel like re-typing this entry as it really expresses my thoughts about the year.
But I won't ;)
I'll enjoy this new years. I really will. Sad to see 2003 go. With all the things it taught me I will miss it. The person I'll miss most today is Christian, but as he is in Japan having what I believe must be the time of his life right now I'll just be happy too ^^