Spitefic: Kiri, Kiri
Title: Kiri, Kiri
Author: das_mervin
Fandom(s): New Moon/Audition
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,327
Inspiration: Bella’s behavior throughtout New Moon when she begins stalking Jacob and her obsession with Edward leaving her.
Warnings: Violence, disturbing imagery.
Summary: He left her once. She would never let him leave her again.
Author’s Note: A crossover and species-switch. Just me trying to show that Bella’s behavior is just as frightening as Edward’s, people just tend to overlook it because she is the “powerless” one in the relationship.
The first thing Edward Cullen became aware of was that he was very uncomfortable. He wanted to move, to reposition himself, or at least get off of the very hard, very cold wooden floor. That is when he became aware of the second reason for his discomfort-he couldn’t move. No matter how hard he tried
“Are you awake?”
Icy fingers of shock plunged deep into Edward’s spine even as his heart leapt into his throat-that voice, that calm, loving, smooth as silk and sweet as honey voice, was the last thing he expected to hear, especially right now. He opened his eyes, squinting briefly as the light temporarily blinded him, but he forced his muddy thoughts into some kind of order, willed his eyes to focus. He tried to lift his head, to look for the voice’s owner, but found he couldn’t even do that.
A beautiful, angelic figure slowly moved into Edward’s range of vision. She was beautiful as ever, her shiny brunette hair hanging loose in auburn waves, her golden eyes glistening against the lights, her flawless features smooth and almost glowing in the reflected light of the sun. Edward tried unsuccessfully to ignore the growing sense of unease deep in his stomach.
He licked his cracked lips, staring up at the visage, and finally managing to unlock his throat and speak.
“Bella,” he rasped. “What-”
“Good,” Bella said, smiling down at him. “You are awake. I was worried you were just going to sleep all day again.” She bit her lip and looked away. “I’m sorry-Carlisle wasn’t very specific about just how much tranquilizer to use.” She turned back to him with a smile. “But it doesn’t matter-you’re awake now, and we can talk. And we need to.”
Carlisle? His father? None of this made any sense; his brain refused to process anything that Bella was saying, still gummed up with whatever Bella had dosed him with. Edward struggled to move again, but his limbs were leaden and unresponsive. “Bella, what-why are you-”
“Doing this?” she said, finishing his sentence. Edward looked back over to her and saw her golden eyes, filled with a sharp pain that scared him. “You know why,” she continued. Her eyes squeezed shut and she crossed her arms across her chest, gripping her elbows. “You left me.” Her voice was broken. “You left me alone.”
For a moment, all Edward could hear was his own heart pounding in his ears as the silence hung heavily after Bella’s accusatory words.
“I went to your house. I came to your window, like I always do. Your scent was still there-but it was already fading. You weren’t there. Your things weren’t there. Nothing but the furniture.” She looked off, staring at some point that Edward could never hope to see, her eyes distant. “I thought that-at first, that maybe you just went on a trip without telling me. But why would you leave without telling me where you were going so I could follow you? You always do. I watched your house for days-I didn’t even hunt. I just waited for you. But you never came back. Ever.”
Edward struggled to keep calm, and then forced himself to start talking again.
“You were dangerous, Bella,” Edward managed, his voice cracking and pleading. “You-you said it yourself. You are very dangerous for me-you told me that we should stay apart, that I should stay away. We-we weren’t good together.”
Bella slowly lowered herself to her knees beside Edward’s head, and then reached out and stroked his hair lovingly out of his eyes. Edward shivered when her cold fingers made contact with his flesh. Bella smiled briefly, and then said, “But you love me. And I love you. Couples make things work. They find compromise. You always talked about compromise.”
“This is not compromise,” Edward burst. “Bella, you need to-”
“I couldn’t let you leave,” Bella continued, seemingly not even hearing him. Her hand absently stroked up and down his arm, feather-light as always. “When I heard you were gone and weren’t coming back, I swore I would chase after you. Swore I would find you. And nothing can stop me.” Her gaze flickered back down to him.
Edward took another breath. “Bella,” he said, keeping calm, “just calm down. If it will make you feel better, I’ll…I’ll come back to Forks. My parents would be glad to have me back, I’m sure-”
Bella’s expression silenced him. “I already saw your parents,” she said flatly.
Edward’s blood turned to ice.
“They wouldn’t have wanted you back-they were the ones who talked you into leaving!” She gripped his shoulders tightly, too tight, her fingers biting into his skin. “Don’t you see? They tried to take you from me! They sent you to Florida, to be with that ridiculous grandmother of yours.” Bella’s wild gaze softened, turned curious. “Is that why you left? Some strange obligation to your parents and your siblings?” Edward’s breath hitched at the suddenly kind smile Bella bestowed him. “Don’t worry.” Her fingers moved to his temple again, stroking, petting. “I took care of it for you-I’d do anything for you, you know I would. You don’t have to worry about them anymore.”
Edward couldn’t think. His brain was seized up. No, she didn’t-she wouldn’t-she couldn’t-not his parents, his family, no-
“I don’t understand this obsession you have with humanity,” she said, sounding frustrated now. “Humans-what on earth are they compared to us, I ask you? What can a human do that I can’t do a hundred-no, a thousand times better? My senses are heightened, I see and know and feel more than you, I don’t need to breathe or sleep or even blink! I’m faster, stronger, more beautiful-better! Why cling to humanity when there is an easy way to get rid of it?”
“Carlisle-Esme-” Edward choked.
Bella bit her lower lip. “Carlisle wouldn’t tell me where you’d gone-but he had to-I had to know where you were,” Bella insisted, the words coming rapidly, half-excited, half-pleading. “But he eventually did. And Esme-well, she came home early and became a loose end. That’s now tied up. And your brothers and sisters?” Bella’s mouth turned downwards into a regretful frown. “I did like Alice. I truly did. She was nice-and she understood how much I need you. She wanted us to be together. But it was all for the best. I’ve cut your strings for you, Edward-all those useless, human strings, because you weren’t strong enough to do it. You didn’t need them-don’t need them-and now you’re free.” She leaned down close to him, her cool breath puffing on his cheek. “Free to be with me.” Edward managed to turn away, hideous sobs rising up in his chest, the horror of what Bella had done battering his brain, the terror of what she was going to do threatening to smother him.
“What would I do without you?” she breathed against his neck, her hand caressing his collarbone briefly.
And then she was gone, standing up again, striding across the room and out of his range of vision. Edward couldn’t hold back any longer; a horrible wail burst out of him, tears streaming down his face. “You bitch!” he screamed, wanting to curl into a ball, wanting to get up and hurl himself at the beautiful monster and tear her to shreds, wanting to do anything but simply be unmoving on the hard wooden floor-but his body simply mocked him in its useless immobility.
“Don’t say that,” Bella said, her voice wounded, her expression probably shocked and hurt. Edward heard her rummaging through something, but he couldn’t see her-and he didn’t care either way. His parents were dead. His entire family was dead. Dead because of her. Dead because Bella refused to see it was good for both of them if he left. Dead because he didn’t know just how much Bella would chase him and do anything to get him back.
Anything.
Bella was back. Edward barely registered the strange black gloves and apron she was now wearing over her pretty white dress, only seeing that scolding, divine face that, for the first time in his life, he wanted nothing more than to run away from.
“It hurts now, Edward-I know,” Bella said gently. “I lost my parents long ago, too. Charles and Renee…they were wonderful people. But the pain fades-because you’ll have eternity to move on. Eternity to be with me.”
Bella knelt again, rocking back on her heels and folding her hands together, the rubber of her gloves creaking. “I can’t live without you, Edward. I love you too much to let you go-not when I have a way to stop you from dying.” She paused, reaching out and fiddling with his clothes, straightening them and then stroking his hair. “And more than that,” she continued, sounding generous. “I love you now, even with all of your ridiculous human flaws. But I can take those from you. I can make you so I’ll love you even more-I can make you perfect,” she breathed.
Edward stilled for a moment, his sobs stuck in his throat as his mind slowly and stutteringly managed to comprehend what she was saying. “You-you’re going to change me?” he whispered incredulously. “After everything-”
“Yes, Edward,” Bella murmured lovingly, rising again. “I am. I know you think you don’t want to be one now, but once you are changed, you will realize just how ridiculous your desire to stay human is. Mortality and humanity is nothing compared to this, my love.” She smiled down at him, sweetly, gently. “And your soul is already mine-and you know that mine is yours.”
Change him-Bella was going to change him. Edward had always refused Bella’s offers-stoutly and adamantly. He didn’t want to be a vampire-immortality frightened him, the idea of such loneliness, looking down at eternity with only a small group of people, never being able to get close to anyone, losing his soul to become something like Bella…but the idea was now appealing. As terrified as he was, as much as he didn’t want it, one burning thought penetrated the haze and sorrow: if he was a vampire, he could fight back-he could kill Bella.
He knew newborns were insanely powerful and strong-stronger than Bella. Stronger than anything. He would have a chance to pay Bella back for everything she had done-to put an end to her. Like she needed. Like she deserved. After all, he had nothing to lose now. She’d taken everything away from him, left him alone in the world, and now he would have a chance to pay her back for hurting him.
Bella reappeared in his range of vision, distracting him from his half-formed thoughts of revenge. He realized she had something in her hands, and when he saw what it was, confusion made him momentarily forget the thoughts entirely.
“You will be perfect as a vampire, Edward,” Bella said, sounding near rapture as she did. However, she became serious very quickly again. “But…well. As a human, it was easy to keep you with me. Everything is easy when you’re a vampire,” she laughed. “But when you’re a vampire-well, it would be easy for you to run away from me and stay gone this time. I can’t let you do that. I want to change you so you’ll be with me forever, not so you can leave me again.”
Bella slowly moved to sit at his feet, her fingers curling around the wire in her hands. “I want you to stay with me, Edward. But I have to make you understand-you’ll forget all of this once you are a vampire. However, that takes time. Until you forget, I have to make sure you stay with me. Have to make you understand what you drive me to do when you try to leave me. It hurts me, Edward. Hurts me like you can’t imagine-humans can’t even begin to comprehend the emotional depth of vampires.” Her eyes burned into his, terrifying him. “When you left…when I couldn’t find you…it was like you’d torn out my heart. A gaping hole in my chest that would never heal. I can tell that you still don’t understand how much it hurts.”
She leaned forward, her gloved hands touching his knees. “I want you to feel even a fraction of that so you can understand what I went through. So you won’t even try to leave, even after what I do-so I’ll know that you love me as much as I love you.”
Edward stared in horror at the wire, at Bella’s face, and suddenly knew.
“No-Bella, please-don’t do this to me!” he began shrieking, his heart pounding out of control as Bella ignored him, touching his ankle lightly, drawing a circle around his shin with one finger.
“It won’t last long-I’ll bite you after it’s over. And it will be clean. That’s why I chose this wire,” she said in a comforting manner. She slowly looped the wire underneath his ankle and pulled it tight, the wire biting into his flesh; a simple tug from a human would cut into him. A simple tug from a vampire would do infinitely worse. She looked up one more time, her expression sorrowful. “I’m sorry I have to do this-I’m sorry you force me to do this.” Her fingers tightened. “You can’t leave me, Edward. Not ever. I can’t bear it-you can’t walk away from me, not again.” She smiled, her eyes filled with love. “Don’t worry, my love. I’ll be strong for you. I’ll always be there for you-and I’ll always carry you.”
Edward screamed.
Author: das_mervin
Fandom(s): New Moon/Audition
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,327
Inspiration: Bella’s behavior throughtout New Moon when she begins stalking Jacob and her obsession with Edward leaving her.
Warnings: Violence, disturbing imagery.
Summary: He left her once. She would never let him leave her again.
Author’s Note: A crossover and species-switch. Just me trying to show that Bella’s behavior is just as frightening as Edward’s, people just tend to overlook it because she is the “powerless” one in the relationship.
The first thing Edward Cullen became aware of was that he was very uncomfortable. He wanted to move, to reposition himself, or at least get off of the very hard, very cold wooden floor. That is when he became aware of the second reason for his discomfort-he couldn’t move. No matter how hard he tried
“Are you awake?”
Icy fingers of shock plunged deep into Edward’s spine even as his heart leapt into his throat-that voice, that calm, loving, smooth as silk and sweet as honey voice, was the last thing he expected to hear, especially right now. He opened his eyes, squinting briefly as the light temporarily blinded him, but he forced his muddy thoughts into some kind of order, willed his eyes to focus. He tried to lift his head, to look for the voice’s owner, but found he couldn’t even do that.
A beautiful, angelic figure slowly moved into Edward’s range of vision. She was beautiful as ever, her shiny brunette hair hanging loose in auburn waves, her golden eyes glistening against the lights, her flawless features smooth and almost glowing in the reflected light of the sun. Edward tried unsuccessfully to ignore the growing sense of unease deep in his stomach.
He licked his cracked lips, staring up at the visage, and finally managing to unlock his throat and speak.
“Bella,” he rasped. “What-”
“Good,” Bella said, smiling down at him. “You are awake. I was worried you were just going to sleep all day again.” She bit her lip and looked away. “I’m sorry-Carlisle wasn’t very specific about just how much tranquilizer to use.” She turned back to him with a smile. “But it doesn’t matter-you’re awake now, and we can talk. And we need to.”
Carlisle? His father? None of this made any sense; his brain refused to process anything that Bella was saying, still gummed up with whatever Bella had dosed him with. Edward struggled to move again, but his limbs were leaden and unresponsive. “Bella, what-why are you-”
“Doing this?” she said, finishing his sentence. Edward looked back over to her and saw her golden eyes, filled with a sharp pain that scared him. “You know why,” she continued. Her eyes squeezed shut and she crossed her arms across her chest, gripping her elbows. “You left me.” Her voice was broken. “You left me alone.”
For a moment, all Edward could hear was his own heart pounding in his ears as the silence hung heavily after Bella’s accusatory words.
“I went to your house. I came to your window, like I always do. Your scent was still there-but it was already fading. You weren’t there. Your things weren’t there. Nothing but the furniture.” She looked off, staring at some point that Edward could never hope to see, her eyes distant. “I thought that-at first, that maybe you just went on a trip without telling me. But why would you leave without telling me where you were going so I could follow you? You always do. I watched your house for days-I didn’t even hunt. I just waited for you. But you never came back. Ever.”
Edward struggled to keep calm, and then forced himself to start talking again.
“You were dangerous, Bella,” Edward managed, his voice cracking and pleading. “You-you said it yourself. You are very dangerous for me-you told me that we should stay apart, that I should stay away. We-we weren’t good together.”
Bella slowly lowered herself to her knees beside Edward’s head, and then reached out and stroked his hair lovingly out of his eyes. Edward shivered when her cold fingers made contact with his flesh. Bella smiled briefly, and then said, “But you love me. And I love you. Couples make things work. They find compromise. You always talked about compromise.”
“This is not compromise,” Edward burst. “Bella, you need to-”
“I couldn’t let you leave,” Bella continued, seemingly not even hearing him. Her hand absently stroked up and down his arm, feather-light as always. “When I heard you were gone and weren’t coming back, I swore I would chase after you. Swore I would find you. And nothing can stop me.” Her gaze flickered back down to him.
Edward took another breath. “Bella,” he said, keeping calm, “just calm down. If it will make you feel better, I’ll…I’ll come back to Forks. My parents would be glad to have me back, I’m sure-”
Bella’s expression silenced him. “I already saw your parents,” she said flatly.
Edward’s blood turned to ice.
“They wouldn’t have wanted you back-they were the ones who talked you into leaving!” She gripped his shoulders tightly, too tight, her fingers biting into his skin. “Don’t you see? They tried to take you from me! They sent you to Florida, to be with that ridiculous grandmother of yours.” Bella’s wild gaze softened, turned curious. “Is that why you left? Some strange obligation to your parents and your siblings?” Edward’s breath hitched at the suddenly kind smile Bella bestowed him. “Don’t worry.” Her fingers moved to his temple again, stroking, petting. “I took care of it for you-I’d do anything for you, you know I would. You don’t have to worry about them anymore.”
Edward couldn’t think. His brain was seized up. No, she didn’t-she wouldn’t-she couldn’t-not his parents, his family, no-
“I don’t understand this obsession you have with humanity,” she said, sounding frustrated now. “Humans-what on earth are they compared to us, I ask you? What can a human do that I can’t do a hundred-no, a thousand times better? My senses are heightened, I see and know and feel more than you, I don’t need to breathe or sleep or even blink! I’m faster, stronger, more beautiful-better! Why cling to humanity when there is an easy way to get rid of it?”
“Carlisle-Esme-” Edward choked.
Bella bit her lower lip. “Carlisle wouldn’t tell me where you’d gone-but he had to-I had to know where you were,” Bella insisted, the words coming rapidly, half-excited, half-pleading. “But he eventually did. And Esme-well, she came home early and became a loose end. That’s now tied up. And your brothers and sisters?” Bella’s mouth turned downwards into a regretful frown. “I did like Alice. I truly did. She was nice-and she understood how much I need you. She wanted us to be together. But it was all for the best. I’ve cut your strings for you, Edward-all those useless, human strings, because you weren’t strong enough to do it. You didn’t need them-don’t need them-and now you’re free.” She leaned down close to him, her cool breath puffing on his cheek. “Free to be with me.” Edward managed to turn away, hideous sobs rising up in his chest, the horror of what Bella had done battering his brain, the terror of what she was going to do threatening to smother him.
“What would I do without you?” she breathed against his neck, her hand caressing his collarbone briefly.
And then she was gone, standing up again, striding across the room and out of his range of vision. Edward couldn’t hold back any longer; a horrible wail burst out of him, tears streaming down his face. “You bitch!” he screamed, wanting to curl into a ball, wanting to get up and hurl himself at the beautiful monster and tear her to shreds, wanting to do anything but simply be unmoving on the hard wooden floor-but his body simply mocked him in its useless immobility.
“Don’t say that,” Bella said, her voice wounded, her expression probably shocked and hurt. Edward heard her rummaging through something, but he couldn’t see her-and he didn’t care either way. His parents were dead. His entire family was dead. Dead because of her. Dead because Bella refused to see it was good for both of them if he left. Dead because he didn’t know just how much Bella would chase him and do anything to get him back.
Anything.
Bella was back. Edward barely registered the strange black gloves and apron she was now wearing over her pretty white dress, only seeing that scolding, divine face that, for the first time in his life, he wanted nothing more than to run away from.
“It hurts now, Edward-I know,” Bella said gently. “I lost my parents long ago, too. Charles and Renee…they were wonderful people. But the pain fades-because you’ll have eternity to move on. Eternity to be with me.”
Bella knelt again, rocking back on her heels and folding her hands together, the rubber of her gloves creaking. “I can’t live without you, Edward. I love you too much to let you go-not when I have a way to stop you from dying.” She paused, reaching out and fiddling with his clothes, straightening them and then stroking his hair. “And more than that,” she continued, sounding generous. “I love you now, even with all of your ridiculous human flaws. But I can take those from you. I can make you so I’ll love you even more-I can make you perfect,” she breathed.
Edward stilled for a moment, his sobs stuck in his throat as his mind slowly and stutteringly managed to comprehend what she was saying. “You-you’re going to change me?” he whispered incredulously. “After everything-”
“Yes, Edward,” Bella murmured lovingly, rising again. “I am. I know you think you don’t want to be one now, but once you are changed, you will realize just how ridiculous your desire to stay human is. Mortality and humanity is nothing compared to this, my love.” She smiled down at him, sweetly, gently. “And your soul is already mine-and you know that mine is yours.”
Change him-Bella was going to change him. Edward had always refused Bella’s offers-stoutly and adamantly. He didn’t want to be a vampire-immortality frightened him, the idea of such loneliness, looking down at eternity with only a small group of people, never being able to get close to anyone, losing his soul to become something like Bella…but the idea was now appealing. As terrified as he was, as much as he didn’t want it, one burning thought penetrated the haze and sorrow: if he was a vampire, he could fight back-he could kill Bella.
He knew newborns were insanely powerful and strong-stronger than Bella. Stronger than anything. He would have a chance to pay Bella back for everything she had done-to put an end to her. Like she needed. Like she deserved. After all, he had nothing to lose now. She’d taken everything away from him, left him alone in the world, and now he would have a chance to pay her back for hurting him.
Bella reappeared in his range of vision, distracting him from his half-formed thoughts of revenge. He realized she had something in her hands, and when he saw what it was, confusion made him momentarily forget the thoughts entirely.
“You will be perfect as a vampire, Edward,” Bella said, sounding near rapture as she did. However, she became serious very quickly again. “But…well. As a human, it was easy to keep you with me. Everything is easy when you’re a vampire,” she laughed. “But when you’re a vampire-well, it would be easy for you to run away from me and stay gone this time. I can’t let you do that. I want to change you so you’ll be with me forever, not so you can leave me again.”
Bella slowly moved to sit at his feet, her fingers curling around the wire in her hands. “I want you to stay with me, Edward. But I have to make you understand-you’ll forget all of this once you are a vampire. However, that takes time. Until you forget, I have to make sure you stay with me. Have to make you understand what you drive me to do when you try to leave me. It hurts me, Edward. Hurts me like you can’t imagine-humans can’t even begin to comprehend the emotional depth of vampires.” Her eyes burned into his, terrifying him. “When you left…when I couldn’t find you…it was like you’d torn out my heart. A gaping hole in my chest that would never heal. I can tell that you still don’t understand how much it hurts.”
She leaned forward, her gloved hands touching his knees. “I want you to feel even a fraction of that so you can understand what I went through. So you won’t even try to leave, even after what I do-so I’ll know that you love me as much as I love you.”
Edward stared in horror at the wire, at Bella’s face, and suddenly knew.
“No-Bella, please-don’t do this to me!” he began shrieking, his heart pounding out of control as Bella ignored him, touching his ankle lightly, drawing a circle around his shin with one finger.
“It won’t last long-I’ll bite you after it’s over. And it will be clean. That’s why I chose this wire,” she said in a comforting manner. She slowly looped the wire underneath his ankle and pulled it tight, the wire biting into his flesh; a simple tug from a human would cut into him. A simple tug from a vampire would do infinitely worse. She looked up one more time, her expression sorrowful. “I’m sorry I have to do this-I’m sorry you force me to do this.” Her fingers tightened. “You can’t leave me, Edward. Not ever. I can’t bear it-you can’t walk away from me, not again.” She smiled, her eyes filled with love. “Don’t worry, my love. I’ll be strong for you. I’ll always be there for you-and I’ll always carry you.”
Edward screamed.