Rambling thoughts of the night
In the darkness I sit and contemplate my life. I contemplate my goals. I search my soul. I seek that which I need. I seek the half that is missing. I search my thoughts for a happiness I can not find. I fight the wave of pain in my heart. I fight the thoughts that would drag me into the darkness that surrounds me. I want my other half. I want my life. I want my future. I want my happiness. I want a day of peace. I want to see her face. I want to know her touch on my cheek. I want to know why I can not have these things. I want to KNOW. I want an answer that I can not find. I want a life I can not have. I want a love that can never be. Where in my life did I lose sight of the joy I once had. I used to always be happy. I used to have a smile that could melt any heart. I use to be whole and now I am just a half searching for the other half in a sea of wrong halves. I sit and wonder what my soulmate is thinking right now. I sit and wonder where she is and if she is happy or if she feels as incomplete as I do. I wonder what she looks like. I wonder what she likes. I wonder if I will ever find her. I wonder when the tears will stop. I wonder when the pain will end. I wonder if my life will ever change. I wonder when I will change it.