summer.
i suppose no one really writes in here anymore like they used to. maybe we've all gotten out of this phase or maybe it's just summer. could be the fact that a lot us could care less about the other one's problems or that this thing always causes drama.
well tthings have changed a lot since graduating college. i moved to california where i always wanted to be...and then moved back to ny...and now i want to move back to ca again. if i could have stayed i probably would have. i think i lost myself through all of this. and i'm trying to win myself back. everyday i learn something more about myself. i guess this is why its called growing up. i dont miss my house. i don't miss my family...i mean i love them but i dont have those feelings from when i was a kid. i can be anywhere really.
i dont have a job still and im collecting unemployment. this is really sucking badly at this point. i need to get a job asap...even if its at starbucks full time...i mean i just dont know where else to go at this point. i have a list of things i want...and i'm never going to be able to get if i dont have money. that sounds selfish. i dont mean it like that. i have an expensive style of fashion. thank you world. i got consumed. its an addiction, along with the being insanely skinny and in shape. which im not at this point. i dont know how to lose it. i've been going to the gym and doing crazy cardio the past few days and intend to keep doing so...i just hopefully like at one point when i did lose all my weight last time that just one day i look down and itts gone. and then i fit in my jeans again and i feel comfortable in my clothes that i love.i think i should just eat carrots for the rest of the summer maybe i'll lose weight that way. salad and yogurt and cottage cheese and carrots. mmm yum. ugh i just have the worst habits of binging and i love LOVE ice cream.
the stress of trying to find a place to move is overwhelming. and that we can afford. we found a town house but who knows im still waiting to hear back if they accept out offer. and if they dont then im shit out of luck again and pretty much screwed. the house is sold in oyster bay and we dont have anywhere to put our things. anotther disaster. i should be vaccumming right now but im so not in the mood i just want to take a nap and snap my fingers and hope that i get a job soon and make money...b/c in nov. i start makeup artist school and tthat goes until march and then here i am again looking for work. god who knows anymore.
sometimes i feel way too lonely and i wish i had friends around. i mean i have friends. like 3 good ones but they all have jobs...and they're always busy...i just wish i had a job..and was busy tooo b/c i think im losing my mind not being busy!
well tthings have changed a lot since graduating college. i moved to california where i always wanted to be...and then moved back to ny...and now i want to move back to ca again. if i could have stayed i probably would have. i think i lost myself through all of this. and i'm trying to win myself back. everyday i learn something more about myself. i guess this is why its called growing up. i dont miss my house. i don't miss my family...i mean i love them but i dont have those feelings from when i was a kid. i can be anywhere really.
i dont have a job still and im collecting unemployment. this is really sucking badly at this point. i need to get a job asap...even if its at starbucks full time...i mean i just dont know where else to go at this point. i have a list of things i want...and i'm never going to be able to get if i dont have money. that sounds selfish. i dont mean it like that. i have an expensive style of fashion. thank you world. i got consumed. its an addiction, along with the being insanely skinny and in shape. which im not at this point. i dont know how to lose it. i've been going to the gym and doing crazy cardio the past few days and intend to keep doing so...i just hopefully like at one point when i did lose all my weight last time that just one day i look down and itts gone. and then i fit in my jeans again and i feel comfortable in my clothes that i love.i think i should just eat carrots for the rest of the summer maybe i'll lose weight that way. salad and yogurt and cottage cheese and carrots. mmm yum. ugh i just have the worst habits of binging and i love LOVE ice cream.
the stress of trying to find a place to move is overwhelming. and that we can afford. we found a town house but who knows im still waiting to hear back if they accept out offer. and if they dont then im shit out of luck again and pretty much screwed. the house is sold in oyster bay and we dont have anywhere to put our things. anotther disaster. i should be vaccumming right now but im so not in the mood i just want to take a nap and snap my fingers and hope that i get a job soon and make money...b/c in nov. i start makeup artist school and tthat goes until march and then here i am again looking for work. god who knows anymore.
sometimes i feel way too lonely and i wish i had friends around. i mean i have friends. like 3 good ones but they all have jobs...and they're always busy...i just wish i had a job..and was busy tooo b/c i think im losing my mind not being busy!