Post Easter Post
Easter this year was pretty good.
Friday night I went home to have a yummy dinner in honor of my brother's departure from my mom's vagina 31 years ago. Happy Birthday James! My sister, Jamie and my parents and I went to Sawa, a really good hibachi place in Eatontown. Glorious. There was a lot of gas dispersed in my car on the ride home. My car still smells like farts - I'm mostly to blame, I haven't had large meals like that in a long while.
Saturday I drove around Bergen County to look at a school that I have an interview with on Thursday. I am barely containing my excitment - the job, the area, the people, all are awesome. Really hoping that interview goes well. First I checked out the school, which is massive, easily three times the physical size of the main building where I currently teach. The drive was really nice, I drove all over Mahwah, Franklin Lakes, Wyckoff, Waldwick, Fair Lawn, Midland Park, Ridgewood, Glen Rock, Saddle River, Saddle Brook, and the not so nice areas of Elmwood Park which is over the river from Paterson. My brother has commented that areas in north jersey go from really nice to shit very fast and as I was driving through Fair Lawn to Elmwood Park and then over a bridge it was almost comical. Fair Lawn is pretty nice, I know that area a little bit, Elmwood Park, not so nice as Fair Lawn but ok, Whoa! It's suddenly really shitty here. Oh, I am on East 33rd street in Paterson. Yay.
I then decided to go over the border to check out Suffern, NY. The girl who is going to interview me lives in Nyack, which is waaay too far but recommended that area. So, I drove around there. The town itself is very quaint, backdropped by the Appalachians, but there was a weird seediness to it. Plus, I know zilch about Rockland County and driving around there I realized I need someone to show me around because I had no idea where I was going. I made a turn to get back to the main drag and ended back in NJ.
Sunday I went back home to the fam, we played the annual "Pacify the Granma" by taking her out for Easter brunch. Being that we did James' bday dinner without granma being there or having any clue so we could actually talk to each other, we did Easter brunch at the Rum Runner in Sea Bright. The brunch was amazing, they had all you could eat jumbo shrimp, which my family cleared a few times. You had your choice of the buffet or the ala carte menu - Jamie, James, Shannon and I did the buffet while my parents and gma ordered from the menu. My dad asked me if I could get him a plate of shrimp which I happily obliged, my dad got an order of lamb chops. My granmother later complained that she wanted shrimp "but nobody asked me". This was bullshit as she clearly saw me get a plate for my dad and ask the whole table if anyone wanted anything while I was up. I even gave her one of my oysters.
My family likes to talk over dinner and being that everyone but my granma has at the very least a college degree - the conversation goes all over the place. Granma gets mad when she isn't the center of attention all the time, telling the same stories over and over. You mention Hoboken, "Your grandfather was born in Hoboken". Yes. On Water street, but he moved to Red Hook a short time after - I know for the millionth time.
My sister works at the Childrens Hospital in Boston, doing social work and coordinating with the children's dentistry department. Shannon has really come to enjoy the job and has a lot of really cool stories. Shannon was telling us that the wing gets crowded sometimes and as she is a liason to the dentists to write policy to make their jobs easier, she oftentimes finds herself actually helping out - she told us that she does teeth cultures with cotton swabs on little kids. Shannon is really great with kids, so to hear this was cool - but granma got pissed at Shannon and we had to change the subject. Granma also prattled on about the election - she thinks we shouldn't have a woman president - and then began to say some very racist things about blacks. This irritates me more and more as I don't see Shannon or Jamie all the time, I haven't seen her before this weekend since January - moreover - my granma has no idea about how intelligent and indepent my sister, sister and law and mother are and how grossly offensive those comments are to them. We sat there cringeing/listening to how granma laughed at recalling sitting in the "N_ Balcony" in a theatre near Washington Square Park where she and her friends would heckle the gay people that tended to congregate their. Yes, she is in her 80's and those were not uncommon beliefs for her generation, but they are still wrong and she should know better by now that her three grandkids do not share her views on the role of women, race or equal rights in American society. Believe what you want, but fucking keep it to yourself when you damn well know that everyone else around you thinks the opposite. There are points where my siblings and I just want to talk to each other or my parents, but when granma is there, we have to edit ourselves to the point of not being ourselves. It's really annoying. My brother, refuses to put up with it. I can't really blame him.
My mom and I drove granma home after dinner, granma was pissy and quiet, made my mom feel guilty and then the rest of the nearly hour car ride was her babbling non-stop. I feel for my mom. My granma never asks about her life, or how she is getting along, she is so uniformly selfish. It's a pain in the ass. The ride back was a good conversation, me trying to make my mom feel better and not feeling like she's a bad daughter.
It's interesting how family dynamics change over time. My brother and sister are still very close and I don't think that will (god willing) ever change. My parents too, are a pain in the ass at times but are loving good people - who hate leaving Monmouth County at all. You make concessions to keep the family going - right now everyone puts up with my granma out of guilt - as James so rightly says - we constantly let her get away with behavior that we wouldn't allow from a 6 year old. But that's the way it is, for the forseeable future.
Friday night I went home to have a yummy dinner in honor of my brother's departure from my mom's vagina 31 years ago. Happy Birthday James! My sister, Jamie and my parents and I went to Sawa, a really good hibachi place in Eatontown. Glorious. There was a lot of gas dispersed in my car on the ride home. My car still smells like farts - I'm mostly to blame, I haven't had large meals like that in a long while.
Saturday I drove around Bergen County to look at a school that I have an interview with on Thursday. I am barely containing my excitment - the job, the area, the people, all are awesome. Really hoping that interview goes well. First I checked out the school, which is massive, easily three times the physical size of the main building where I currently teach. The drive was really nice, I drove all over Mahwah, Franklin Lakes, Wyckoff, Waldwick, Fair Lawn, Midland Park, Ridgewood, Glen Rock, Saddle River, Saddle Brook, and the not so nice areas of Elmwood Park which is over the river from Paterson. My brother has commented that areas in north jersey go from really nice to shit very fast and as I was driving through Fair Lawn to Elmwood Park and then over a bridge it was almost comical. Fair Lawn is pretty nice, I know that area a little bit, Elmwood Park, not so nice as Fair Lawn but ok, Whoa! It's suddenly really shitty here. Oh, I am on East 33rd street in Paterson. Yay.
I then decided to go over the border to check out Suffern, NY. The girl who is going to interview me lives in Nyack, which is waaay too far but recommended that area. So, I drove around there. The town itself is very quaint, backdropped by the Appalachians, but there was a weird seediness to it. Plus, I know zilch about Rockland County and driving around there I realized I need someone to show me around because I had no idea where I was going. I made a turn to get back to the main drag and ended back in NJ.
Sunday I went back home to the fam, we played the annual "Pacify the Granma" by taking her out for Easter brunch. Being that we did James' bday dinner without granma being there or having any clue so we could actually talk to each other, we did Easter brunch at the Rum Runner in Sea Bright. The brunch was amazing, they had all you could eat jumbo shrimp, which my family cleared a few times. You had your choice of the buffet or the ala carte menu - Jamie, James, Shannon and I did the buffet while my parents and gma ordered from the menu. My dad asked me if I could get him a plate of shrimp which I happily obliged, my dad got an order of lamb chops. My granmother later complained that she wanted shrimp "but nobody asked me". This was bullshit as she clearly saw me get a plate for my dad and ask the whole table if anyone wanted anything while I was up. I even gave her one of my oysters.
My family likes to talk over dinner and being that everyone but my granma has at the very least a college degree - the conversation goes all over the place. Granma gets mad when she isn't the center of attention all the time, telling the same stories over and over. You mention Hoboken, "Your grandfather was born in Hoboken". Yes. On Water street, but he moved to Red Hook a short time after - I know for the millionth time.
My sister works at the Childrens Hospital in Boston, doing social work and coordinating with the children's dentistry department. Shannon has really come to enjoy the job and has a lot of really cool stories. Shannon was telling us that the wing gets crowded sometimes and as she is a liason to the dentists to write policy to make their jobs easier, she oftentimes finds herself actually helping out - she told us that she does teeth cultures with cotton swabs on little kids. Shannon is really great with kids, so to hear this was cool - but granma got pissed at Shannon and we had to change the subject. Granma also prattled on about the election - she thinks we shouldn't have a woman president - and then began to say some very racist things about blacks. This irritates me more and more as I don't see Shannon or Jamie all the time, I haven't seen her before this weekend since January - moreover - my granma has no idea about how intelligent and indepent my sister, sister and law and mother are and how grossly offensive those comments are to them. We sat there cringeing/listening to how granma laughed at recalling sitting in the "N_ Balcony" in a theatre near Washington Square Park where she and her friends would heckle the gay people that tended to congregate their. Yes, she is in her 80's and those were not uncommon beliefs for her generation, but they are still wrong and she should know better by now that her three grandkids do not share her views on the role of women, race or equal rights in American society. Believe what you want, but fucking keep it to yourself when you damn well know that everyone else around you thinks the opposite. There are points where my siblings and I just want to talk to each other or my parents, but when granma is there, we have to edit ourselves to the point of not being ourselves. It's really annoying. My brother, refuses to put up with it. I can't really blame him.
My mom and I drove granma home after dinner, granma was pissy and quiet, made my mom feel guilty and then the rest of the nearly hour car ride was her babbling non-stop. I feel for my mom. My granma never asks about her life, or how she is getting along, she is so uniformly selfish. It's a pain in the ass. The ride back was a good conversation, me trying to make my mom feel better and not feeling like she's a bad daughter.
It's interesting how family dynamics change over time. My brother and sister are still very close and I don't think that will (god willing) ever change. My parents too, are a pain in the ass at times but are loving good people - who hate leaving Monmouth County at all. You make concessions to keep the family going - right now everyone puts up with my granma out of guilt - as James so rightly says - we constantly let her get away with behavior that we wouldn't allow from a 6 year old. But that's the way it is, for the forseeable future.