(no subject)
Ginny Weasley and the Online Date
by twiddlekinks
Categories: Romance/Fluff/Smut
Pairings: Draco/Ginny
Rating: Naughty
Summary: The wizard dating scene is utterly boring. Tired of the same old stuff, Ginny Weasley turns to the Internet, specifically online dating services. Whom does she find?
-x-
Chapter 10: In Which the Two Enjoy Some Food for Thought
And a rather nice lunch, really.
-x-
The next day, armed with her computer and rodent and keybard, Ginny headed to the OkCupid site. Her thoughts were quite a whirl, between Draco Malfoy's surprisingly nice behavior and the few good men she'd met last night. Of the latter, she could only recall a green Mohawk.
Pansy came bustling in, just as Ginny was settling down. The Genghis-Khunt immediately asked, "So. I'm getting praise mail and tons of new messages and woos and comments because of that shindiggity shindig. What did you think?"
Ginny smiled. "I thought it went rather well. The speed-dating was a tad flurried, but I guess that was the point, really?"
Pansy nodded regally. "Indeed." She then frowned. "And then your Honorable Trio showed up. Honestly, I don't really see the point of belligerently barging into a tasteful gathering. But I think that the OkCupid head honcho and I managed to diffuse the tension a bit." She smacked her lips. "Did you see all of the fracas, dearheart?"
"I saw them come in, I think. There's no mistaking the… er… immensity of Hermione's hair."
Pansy waggled her finger. "And you didn't come rushing to my aid? Where's the Gryffindor in you, Weasley?"
Ginny blushed and shook her head. "Actually, after I spotted the three, I ah… went to the atrium. For some fresh air, you see."
Pansy smirked. "Yes. Too right." She sighed dramatically. "Well, I'm glad that they didn't spot Draco, at the least. That would have never convinced them to stay. Where did the little bugger go, I wonder?"
Ginny coughed. "Actually… ah… he was in the atrium, too." She blushed even more. "Oh, no, Pansy, not like that. From what I understand, he was trying to get away from the fawning masses. We had a surprisingly pleasant conversation, and then I snuck out."
"A pleasant conversation?" Pansy's eyebrows were raised. "About what topic would a Weasley and a Malfoy pleasantly converse?"
Ginny thought back. "Hrm… well, speed-dating, for one. And a few Muggle activities, which I actually have no idea about. He actually offered to teach me a few Muggle-isms, but I'm sure he was joking. A Malfoy would never invite a Weasley to lunch, just to teach a clueless peasant about drugs or drinking."
Pansy looked surprised, then pleased. "No, Draco Malfoy never jokes when it comes to learning. Or lunch, for that matter. I'm guessing that he's finally showing us Ministry Administratives a more pleasant polite side." She cackled. "You should definitely go, Weasley. See if you can get us more funding."
Ginny sighed. "I guess." She gave her friend a tired smile. "Your party was interesting, though, if a tad on the pink side. If only the trio's antagonistic entrance hadn't disrupted things -- I very much wanted to meet more people."
Pansy grinned. "Eh, well. You can have the pleasure of meeting many of them online, instead." Then she waxed poetic on some of the more nice, and some of the more weird people she had met, and how she had done everything from tackling to blocking. And then she trained her attention on Ginny, once again. "So… did you manage to snag or break a few boys' hearts before you scuttled out?"
Ginny grinned. "Well… via OkCupid, I've been talking inconsistently to a few louts, but a few more conversations with one bloke in particularly. And I did meet a man in a Mohawk who seems to fit the bill. We didn't quite discuss screennames, but… if it's him, then he sounds interesting, at the least." She sighed. "If only I knew more Muggle."
"Knowing Muggle-isms is easy, Ginny," Pansy replied. Then she looked at her watch. "But I'm not a good teacher. Have fun on your munch with Malfoy, and learn all you can. Ta!"
After Pansy left, Ginny decided to check her mail.
There was a comment from RomanceSlave:
I know who you really are. And I love how you did this! You really did your ... homework? And I can't believe the comments on the thing actually exist!
…A tad bamboozling, in an incredulous sort of way. But she always liked being recognized for work.
And a particularly appreciative comment came from bigreader2007:
Awesome profile, love ya. ~bigreader~
And another sweet comment from Acorna:
RedGin, I think your profile's great :D
And a salutation from mewmew282:
Heya! via comment, and also a message with a subject line of "=)" and a Hello!
Ginny replied: And a salutation to you, as well! Who are you?
She had no idea what the girls (er… she guessed that they were girls) meant, but decided to "approve" all of the comments. The more the merrier, yes? And perhaps she could peruse everything at a later date, thereby learning more of various Muggle intricacies.
And gwfan had asked a question:
Have you gone on a fun D8 yet? Love the story, by the way.
Ginny wasn't sure exactly what to reply to that one. Perhaps the girl had mixed her up with a friend. Ginny loved words, but she was certainly not an author. She ruefully shook her head. She had quite enjoyed Pansy's prolifically pink party, but she hadn't actually garnered any desirable dates from her Internet interactions. Though, come to think of it, she had been asked to lunch with a particularly odd Malfoy. But that was definitely not a date, and she had known the fellow prior to the online dating scene. "There's also that SilveredDragon fellow," her thoughts whispered. But had he even shown up at the party? Perhaps it had been Mr. Mohawk with the dragon pendant. Now, if only she could remember his name. Ah well… if he'd liked her, then he might've filled out a "yes" on the speed-dating cards. And if not, well… the process had just saved a lot of time, really.
Suddenly, an IM popped up, from nnjdc
Bizarre comments you have. Johnny's complete misinterpretation of meretricious is good in Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps, though not technically a new word. It's a logical assumption too.
An interesting fellow. But what did he mean?
She replied:
Bizarre comments? Would you please elaborate on that?
Well, one person thinks you're really fit (though you have no photo) and one person thinks you're living a secret life that only they know the truth of.
Hrm. She looked at her comments again.
Ah. Well, perhaps they're both quite correct.
Could be.
She decided to further the conversation: I haven't encountered your aforementioned Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps. What do you mean?
It's a brilliant sitcom that almost everyone in the world except me hates. The official bbc guide to comedy rubbishes it - which leaves me asking why they commissioned five series of it.
She was getting a tad confused. The bloke's profile seemed to be chock full of quirky character -- apparently, he wanted to be a cat "in his next life," which she supposed was a pun. However, she had the distinct feeling that she was getting in over her head. Nevertheless, she tried to keep conversing.
Goodness. Makes no sense, that.
He replied,
Indeed. Such is life. I think it's brilliant, but then it does have an episode revolving around Johnny getting agoraphobia and his girlfriend trying to cure it by making him fall in love with a giant biscuit.
Now, that definitely made even less sense. To Ginny, anyway. In the pause, he wrote,
I'm not selling this, am I?
She breathed an almost sigh of relief.
Er... Well, I think I would need to see it to really understand what you mean.
But it does sound quite interesting.
It's a work of genius, I promise you.
Though Shakespeare and Austen it ain't.
Ah, a man who knew Shakespeare and Austen. Even though he favored other works. Well, she could at least wax poetic on her favorite authors.
Well, very few of us could reach the level of Shakespeare or Austen. Though their tone is somewhat old and classical compared to what we're capable of today.
He immediately replied:
Yes. I can't pretend to be a huge shakespeare fan, in part because what was cutting edge use of language then has become truism by repetition.
Ack! And another IM suddenly tackled her. This time, it was from leadmeastray
hey
She replied to him, too:
Hello.
He wrote,
just getting through your profile.
how are you doing?
She sighed. Seemed like the same old story. She continued to check her mail. She had also been invited to an "Atomic Grind Show At CBGBs Gallery": " Your favorite circus funk fiasco returns to CBGBS gallery for a rolicking good time. NEW SONGS! CDS! IN MANHATTAN!" Well, it did sound vaguely interesting, but … alas, she was a few months behind. And was there a Manhattan in England? Silly Muggles and their sense of time and space. Or lack thereof, really.
Uh oh... her IM window popped up again. Still from leadmeastray.
??
have I managed to offend you in less than three proper sentances??
Impatient bloke, wasn't he? She felt guilty, just the same.
Oh Goodness.
No, not at all.
I'm just a bit busy at the moment.
ok
another time??
Examining his messages, she decided that she didn't quite approve of his misspellings or his double question marks. However, she decided to be polite.
Sure.
Have a good day!
He replied,
byex
"Byex"? What in the world was that? She shook her head. The blatant misspellings were somewhat cute, but grew decidedly old quite quickly. Oh no... another blinking message.
From danjuma:
hey,luv
Hrm... that didn't look too propitious. She typed back anyway.
Hello.
hw u doing
Egad. Lack of punctuation really gave her a headache.
Erm, good.
have gone for dinner
i thought u are no more around
Now he was being confusing AND ungrammatical. Not a particularly winning combination.
Pardon?
my name is daniel
She took a peek at his profile. Ah. She didn't quite have time for a chap whose profile was so focused on sex.
Um, I'm rather busy at the moment.
thats ok
That was it. No capitalization or apostrophes, either? She shook her head.
Good bye.
bye.................
Ugh. She decided to use the "block" feature -- Pansy had just described it that morning, talking about some guy who had been utterly focused on toe rings. Granted, Pansy's suitor had been a bit more odd, but Ginny was getting much more grouchy these days.
Oh no... and yet another IM. From dz-mc. With the same old "how r u" and blah blah. Well, she guessed the boring chaps had discovered online dating, as well. This one was badgering her about "hopin 2 go out 2nite" with a "u live in London" and "u aint got photo on ur profile" and "soz to hammer with many questions at once" -- all in all, quite appalling for her sense of grammar and polite conversation. She quickly said, "good-bye" and blocked this bloke as well. Then she returned to her conversation with the more intellectual nnjdc. His last IM had been:
Yes. I can't pretend to be a huge shakespeare fan, in part because what was cutting edge use of language then has become truism by repetition.
She pondered that for a bit.
"To be or not to be" being a cliche, and all that?
He replied,
Well that's less of a cliche and more of, erm, a nonsense.
All the world's a stage. That sort of thing.
Hrm... A nonsense? How could Shakespeare be nonsensical?
I doubt it's a nonsense, really...
I'd like to think that it asks why or how we choose to exist.
But perhaps the world's a stage; I've certainly met many players.
She giggled to herself. Quidditch players and people players alike. Draco Malfoy, for example, seemed to fit the bill for both types.
He was saying,
Well yes, it does. What it says fundamentally is "God I'm depressed and everything's a mess, shall I kill myself or shall I do something about it".
All the world might well be a stage, but it's cliche now.
She wasn't quite sure where he was going with that. But he did sound remarkably intelligent, compared to the other people who had just IM'd her.
In the pause, he wrote,
Well, I think so anyway.
She almost laughed.
I'm sorry for taking so long to respond; some ah... less intelligent company is badgering me with messages and I'm trying to disentangle myself from those conversations while being somewhat polite.
Not that blocking was all that polite, of course. But her online personality could do whatever she wanted, and she didn't have to face the would-be suitors. "Ah, efficiency," she thought, "thy synonym is 'online d8.'"
He had replied,
Goodness. Well, at least I'm not the biggest thickie online today.
She grinned.
Oh, no, not at all. You're quite entertaining, in fact.
Entertaining... mmm, could be worse I suppose!
She decided to continue perusing her eight new messages. Hrm...
She had missed an instant message from Jencakes:
Hey. What's up? ^_^
She grinned. That "^_^" looked so cute -- like a little smiley face. She replied:
Hello! I'm sorry I missed you. I was just beleaguered by oodles of IMs from not-so-intelligent men, and I'm glad to have gotten a relatively normal, as well as grammatically correct and correctly capitalized intstant message. :) How are you, and what are you up to?
Next in her Inbox, there was a message from BoyWhoLived:
Hi,
My name is Harry. I just signed up for this, and was browsing about, when your profile caught my eye--despite that you don't have any pictures, you seem like an interesting person. Plus, we're from the same area--where in London do you live, exactly? Perhaps I know it.
Actually, now that I read your profile, you seem vaguely familiar...maybe we've met before. You have red hair, huh? My best friend has red hair--the whole family does. That's pretty unique, isn't it? Anyway, I just wanted to drop you a message and see if perhaps we could chat some time.
Thank you,
Harry P.
Oh dear Merlin. Was the great and glorious Harry Potter using a Muggle dating site? Perhaps Pansy and the OkCupid Administrator had been too persuasive. In any case, how had the Boy Wonder found her?
She hurriedly signed off from the instant messaging and the intelligent nnjdc.
Alas, however -- I just realized there's something I forgot to do, and I need to go do it. :( But hopefully, we can chat at another time?
Good-bye for now!
That said, she sat at her desk and looked at the Harry message. Panicking. Hadn't the BoyWhoLived been living with TheGirlWhoReadEverySingleBookEver, when she'd last checked? Perhaps he was sniffing out wizards or witches on the site. Was it an undercover sort of job, in conjunction with all of those "professional secrets" he used to keep from her? Hrm... after another bout of worry, and a snuff of righteous indignation, her mischievous streak took over. She'd replied to most of her messages, so… why not message him back? No harm in it, right?
Hello, Harry --
Thank you for your message! I live somewhat near a not-so-public Alley. There seem to be quite a few of them around here.
I happen to believe that many people in London have met many other people in London -- if not officially, then perhaps on the train or in passing. It's quite mind-boggling, really, all of the connections that we can make unknowingly.
Red hair seems to be quite common, to be honest. I passed three people on the street today with my exact shade. Your profile mentions that you're good at saving the world. How often is that necessary, really? I do agree that Knowledge (is power), and I definitely couldn't do without it.
Thanks again for your message; it's quite nice to receive a message from a nice person. Have a good day! :)
-Red
She felt a tad guilty at signing it "Red" when he had put his real name. But seriously -- "Ginny" was much less common than "Harry" around London. And she was well-"read." Quite punny, that. She perused the profile once more. Grr… he had also put that he was "particularly inclined towards Asians." The nerve of that boy. And where was SilveredDragon?
-x-
Draco Malfoy was quite busy. He had accounts to run, businesses to oversee, and mail to check. Ah, the siren call of OkCupid and its blinking boxes. He opened his mailbox.
Egads. In bold-faced font was a plethora of woos. From stephaniesays_ ("Says what, exactly?" he wondered), TaintedInnocent ("Hrm…Oxymoronic bint, there."), Alygirll29 ("Similar to Diagon Alley? Aly? Can she spell?"), imelda72 ("I meld a? What does she meld?"), megthedamsel ("Well, lucky she isn't Meg-the-Man."), and Punkin02 ("Squash. Twice.").
Despite his typically snarky mental comments, he preened. They'd all woo'd within a few days of each other, however, so… he was starting to suspect a conspiracy. Or, at the least, a few bits of evidence for womanly cycles. He decided to once again bypass the woos, and focus on the actual messages. Time, efficiency, and all of that logic, after all. With a distinctive relish, he handled his mouse with expert grace and clicked on the first message.
From: Lorinna
To: SilveredDragon
Subject: you
you sound like a deflated pig. non?
Ah. Well then. Not quite his cup of tea, but such insolence would decidedly not be encouraged.
From: SilveredDragon
To: Lorinna
Subject: Re: you
"Non" is correct. While I respect pork, I am personally never "deflated;" in fact, my ego is healthily inflated at all times. That said, I will hereby assume that you will be most appreciative of this fact.
Disgruntled, he moved on.
From: Punkin02
To: SilveredDragon
Subject: (none)
Hello,
Hopefully I can be intriguing enough as to not waste your time. Although I admit I am much better at conversing online than off. I'm much to much of a dreamer, I focus better when writing. Anyways, you have mercuric eyes? That sounds captivating, I've always found eyes that were of a color not the norm to be quite beautiful. Hope to hear from you.
He inwardly groaned. The girl was from the States. While he respected those Americans, he couldn't quite fathom trying to understand those atrocious accents. And this girl liked online conversations better than real ones. With his obvious online attraction, he didn't quite have time for such a "relationship." He wondered if she had any relation to the pink sweater and red glasses girl from Pansy's party. He then noticed that she had asked only one question amidst the babble, and decided to be succinct.
From: Silvered Dragon
To: Punkin02
Subject: Re:
Yes.
Brilliant. Purely Malfoy, without going against his mother's age-old adage, "Draco, have some manners! Reply when spoken to, and respond to correspondence. Malfoys have an image to uphold."
The next message was actually quite entertaining:
From: imelda72
To: Silvered Dragon
Subject: Mmmm
Cunning linguist, are you? Care to let me assess your skills next Friday?
;-) imelda
He smirked. At least this girl had good taste. He often favored the direct approach. But then he looked at her location, and sighed.
From: Silvered Dragon
To: imelda72
Subject: Re: Mmmm
Alas, New York is not within my immediate plans for travel. However, if you opt to travel to London, perhaps we can share a most delicious repartee. In the meantime, you may have my utmost sympathy for missing my exhibition of labial skill.
He looked at his reply. It didn't sound quite right, but he seemed a tad off today. Too high-faluting, perhaps. A bit lofty. But his standards were growing quite astronomical, these days. He allowed himself a second to think about RedGin, and wondered where she was.
Another message was a tad worrying:
From:
To: mewmew282:
Hello! You do sound familiar.....do I know you?
He dearly hoped not. While the girl's profile was just a shade fascinating, her profile also stated that she was merely seventeen. As he was not wont to indulge in illicitly-aged affairs of the younger nature (again, that was Zabini's area of expertise), he decided to go against his mother's commands. He closed the OkCupid window. After all, he had a lunch to attend to.
Draco grumbled. He still wasn't quite sure why he'd initiated the meeting, or if he really wanted to keep talking to Weasel-the-Youngest. But anything was better than being bored, really. And he needed to eat some time, didn't he? He could always bait her and watch her complexion diffuse with scarlet. Always amusing, in the Weasley expense.
Just as he was leaving his office, Pansy caught up with him. Despite his best efforts to pointedly ignore her, she said, "Now, there, Draconis Maximums. I like the little weasel. She helped me with decorations, and she's quite a sweet girl to have around. You be good. Or else."
And, with that, she swept away.
-x-
Ginny was nervous. They had set a time and place in the atrium the day before, and she supposed that, if the goose didn't show, she would have a pleasant lunch anyway. But, all in all, she was nervous. Which was a warning sign, really. But a good sign, she supposed. It means that she was still thinking with her wits. It also meant that this could not have been a date. Typically, before a date, she had learned a bit about the bloke, and was always prepared to be bored stiff. She knew quite a bit about one Draco Malfoy, and she was nervous. Of course, her dates had always been such nice, sensible-sounding gentlemen. And Malfoy was, at best, unpredictable. Oh, well. She supposed that if he tried anything remotely odd, or if he suddenly abducted her or locked her in the dungeons, she could hope that Pansy would wander by eventually. Ah, Pansy.
"Yes, indeed. Parkinson is quite a driving force."
Ginny whipped around in surprise. But there was only Malfoy, wearing a light blue collared shirt and gray slacks. She realized belatedly that she must have mused aloud. She smiled. "But she throws an interesting sort of party, really."
He shuddered. "Yes. The pink sort." He looked her up and down quickly. "Nice… ah… nice dress, Weasley."
She started in surprise. She was wearing a rather nice dress, but his manner seemed rather… forced. She suddenly scowled. "Malfoy, I don't know what you're playing at, and it's totally odd to listen to you… ah… being nice, but I want to learn about Muggle stuffs, and you offered to teach me, so let's just have lunch, okay? Just don't be odd. Be natural." She waved her fingers airily, and then her manners, well-honed from the many dates she had participated in, suddenly flared to life. She smiled again, and promptly changed the subject. "Did you find any suitable dates at the party?"
He looked slightly peeved, and then his frown cleared. "Actually, I think your usual cronies disrupted our merry band of aspiring daters. But I hear that they all got along very well with the Muggle crowd. They spotted Mr. Ollivander, for one, and then Potter waggled his eyebrows rather disgustingly at a few of the Asian schoolgirls in the room. And I think the Mud--ah, Granger even cooperated in making a speed-dating card, sprinkled with not one, not three, but ten immensely erudite adjectives."
She laughed. "What were your adjectives?"
"Oh, some obviously truthful descriptive words." He couldn't quite remember, to be honest. Oh, yes -- "honest and modest." Eh, whatever. But… now that he thought about it, hadn't her carded adjectives sounded a tad familiar? Then again, he'd been forced to peruse a plethora of profiles. Perhaps a few of the ladies had significant overlap. There was no telling, with the female mind. But was learning the female mind really necessary?
"Of course learning is necessary, Malfoy."
He blinked. What exactly had he said aloud? He decided to opt for a blanket vague statement. "Learning? Yes, indeed. And what do you like to learn, Weasley?"
She looked a bit startled. "Well, I'm quite enthusiastic about vocabulary, but perhaps it's because words are so aesthetically pleasing. But I'm also trying to learn various facets of muggle-dom, especially via people on this online dating site. Which is why I'm participating, really. And lunching with you. Though heaven knows why a Malfoy would know about Muggle life."
"I'll have you know, Weasley, that I am a highly profitable businessman, and my business involves knowing everything about whom I do business with. I have a profound ability to adapt. I do what I do, and, like any Malfoy, I do it well. Now, you mentioned Muggle-dom?" Despite himself, he was curious. "Which aspects, in particular?"
She shrugged. "Well, dancing, perhaps. Muggles have such different forms than we do."
He scoffed. "Dancing is simple, Weasley. Nothing a few small lessons wouldn't instill."
She laughed. "Maybe so. I'd definitely need the lessons to begin with. But Pansy took me to a Muggle club a few weeks ago, and, contrary to popular belief, some of the Muggle dancing I've seen doesn't really seem like the type you can learn via lessons."
He harrumphed. "I profoundly disagree." He was irritated. How dare this poor Weasley imply that a Malfoy couldn't perform well?
"Malfoy, I bet you… oh, I don't know -- this Swiss casserole -- that you couldn't learn some of the Muggle dancing I've seen."
His pride slightly smarting, Draco replied through gritted teeth, "Never let it be said that a Malfoy refused such a simple bet. A Malfoy can learn anything. And excel, accordingly."
Ginny looked thoughtful. "All right, Malfoy. How about this? I'll take you to a Muggle club, and you can see how quickly you can learn. If you can't dance sufficiently Muggle-ish at the end of the night, you'll have to… hmm… give me dancing lessons, maybe?" She giggled. "Though, if you show that you can't dance, then perhaps you should take dancing lessons with me, instead."
He practically growled. "And if I win the bet, Weasley, as I undoubtedly shall?"
She waved her hand airily. "Oh, anything, really."
He suddenly recalled an aspect of their conversation from the previous night. Suddenly feeling charitable, he grinned. "Weasley, if I win, we will partake in a different sort of lesson. I shall, ah… introduce you to the concept of the mysterious Muggle 'porn'. And no, it is not a fruit."
-x-
Later in her office, Ginny realized that she had actually had a pleasant conversation with Draco Malfoy. Perhaps she didn't have to despair about the woeful paucity of cute dateable men after all -- wait a second. Was she actually considering a Malfoy to be dateable? No, not at all. She shook her head violently. But, as she now had an escort to a Muggle club, she could utilize her resources, especially if he was a good teacher.
She suddenly noticed a blinking box on her screen. SilveredDragon!
So... typed RedGin. What do you think of Mohawks?
-x-
Note#1: I'm trying various formattings, and, at the end of the story, I'll probably edit everything so that it's uniform. Which format do you think looks the best?
Note#2: The comments that mention the story itself will be approved once the story's complete. Likewise, all "friend requests" to Draco will be approved then, as well. Ginny's a bit more friendly, so she's already approved quite a few people as friends. Thanks so much for your feedback!
Note#3: When RedGin logged on, she was promptly beleaguered with IM conversations. Nnjdc and leadmeastray and danjuma and dz-mc are real people, though, I think. Eeek! Feel free to message them, if you're interested...
Note#4: Uber-props-and-kudos to whomever made the BoyWhoLived profile. It is absolutely spiffingly Brilliant. And if I'd had to guess what Harry would be, it would've totally been a Poolboy. Oddly enough, I'm dating a Poolboy right now who looks like Draco Malfoy -- tall and blond hair and light grayish eyes and all. :oD
Note#5:
Messages to RedGin:
From imelda72: Too bad we can't get a picture up here... What are you doing running around with a Hornivore, my dear? Don't you know Malfoys are bad for your health?
I signed up on this site because of your fic, twiddlekinks. It's highly amusing--site and fic!
From RedGin: I have no idea what you're talking about, really...
From Twiddlekinks: It seems that people message Malfoy directly, and then me through RedGin, and then I have to keep telling her that she'll find out about all this fuss eventually. But… Thank you all so much for your feedback!
Note#6: Oh dear… I was up at 1150p, Eastern Standard Time, working on the story. And RedGin got an IM from topman82. And he said:
topman82: hiiii
redgin: and hello to you, as well
topman82: than u
topman82: am very well
topman82: though its 5 am
topman82: but am here as am watchin cricket
topman82: heheheh
topman82: so how u doin.?
redgin: haha
topman82: how cum here now...
redgin: i'm quite well, as well
topman82: good
redgin: er... i actually am on a business trip
redgin: and it's only 11:48pm for me
topman82: to?
redgin: the states
topman82: where abt states/
topman82: basically where u from?
*** topman82's IC window is closed
…Phew. I hate running away from anything, but I'm glad he closed first. I had no idea what to say. Gak!!
Note#7: And spacewatcher wrote a message with the subject line "nice livejournal :P"… so I'm assuming that he's not too heartbroken by our heroine's "true" identity. Phew! …Wait a second. There's a "redgin.livejournal.com" -- poor girl. My apologies!
Note#8: I can't really put comments about the story in the story, but here are a few of the correspondences, for your own enjoyment:
From: sarcasticnature
Really, Draco, your just too much! Get over yourself and get a life. Loser!
Lol, just playin, you know I love you!
Interesting, isn't it? I think I'd actually really like SilveredDragon if I met him, loserific-ego and all. Of course, the fantastic hair and the mercuric eyes, as well as the cunning linguistic activity would probably help quite a bit. :)
From: companyofwolves
To: SilveredDragon
Subject: Cauliflower...
is the most underappreciated form of flora on the planet.
I must confess your exploits are highly amusing, Mr. Malfoy.
Cheers.
From: SilveredDragon
To: companyofwolves
Subject: Re: Cauliflower...
Indeed.
I am most pleased to hear of your excellent taste, both culinarily and literarily. However, I have my own confession to make: how in the name of all Merlin's facial hair do all of you know my name?
From: companyofwolves
To: SilveredDragon
Ah, Mr. Malfoy, you might want to track down a very clever person named twiddlekinks.
Highly enjoyable and grammatically fine work, I promise.
hahahaha Oh, now you've gone and done it, lass. Draco's going to get a bit miffed, especially at me.
Note#9: Thanks to all of you who commented, sent a message or IM, and/or added RedGin and SilveredDragon as friends. Ginny's pretty easygoing, and will probably add anyone. Draco's a little uptight, and a bit more protective of his privacy. In other words, in accordance with his snotty blue-blooded mannerisms, he has yet to accept anyone. Maybe, in the end, Ginny can soften him up. ;)
Note#10: A Muggle club? Oooh la la. Haha Then again, I'm a sucker for good dancers, especially ones as hot, snarky, and intelligent as one Draco Malfoy. If you've got ideas, let me know. ;)
Ginny Weasley and the Online D8 via DracoandGinny.Com
*The story was actually taken off Fanfic.Net b/c of its interactive nature. Ah well... If you know of any sites that would host it, let me know! :)
by twiddlekinks
Categories: Romance/Fluff/Smut
Pairings: Draco/Ginny
Rating: Naughty
Summary: The wizard dating scene is utterly boring. Tired of the same old stuff, Ginny Weasley turns to the Internet, specifically online dating services. Whom does she find?
-x-
Chapter 10: In Which the Two Enjoy Some Food for Thought
And a rather nice lunch, really.
-x-
The next day, armed with her computer and rodent and keybard, Ginny headed to the OkCupid site. Her thoughts were quite a whirl, between Draco Malfoy's surprisingly nice behavior and the few good men she'd met last night. Of the latter, she could only recall a green Mohawk.
Pansy came bustling in, just as Ginny was settling down. The Genghis-Khunt immediately asked, "So. I'm getting praise mail and tons of new messages and woos and comments because of that shindiggity shindig. What did you think?"
Ginny smiled. "I thought it went rather well. The speed-dating was a tad flurried, but I guess that was the point, really?"
Pansy nodded regally. "Indeed." She then frowned. "And then your Honorable Trio showed up. Honestly, I don't really see the point of belligerently barging into a tasteful gathering. But I think that the OkCupid head honcho and I managed to diffuse the tension a bit." She smacked her lips. "Did you see all of the fracas, dearheart?"
"I saw them come in, I think. There's no mistaking the… er… immensity of Hermione's hair."
Pansy waggled her finger. "And you didn't come rushing to my aid? Where's the Gryffindor in you, Weasley?"
Ginny blushed and shook her head. "Actually, after I spotted the three, I ah… went to the atrium. For some fresh air, you see."
Pansy smirked. "Yes. Too right." She sighed dramatically. "Well, I'm glad that they didn't spot Draco, at the least. That would have never convinced them to stay. Where did the little bugger go, I wonder?"
Ginny coughed. "Actually… ah… he was in the atrium, too." She blushed even more. "Oh, no, Pansy, not like that. From what I understand, he was trying to get away from the fawning masses. We had a surprisingly pleasant conversation, and then I snuck out."
"A pleasant conversation?" Pansy's eyebrows were raised. "About what topic would a Weasley and a Malfoy pleasantly converse?"
Ginny thought back. "Hrm… well, speed-dating, for one. And a few Muggle activities, which I actually have no idea about. He actually offered to teach me a few Muggle-isms, but I'm sure he was joking. A Malfoy would never invite a Weasley to lunch, just to teach a clueless peasant about drugs or drinking."
Pansy looked surprised, then pleased. "No, Draco Malfoy never jokes when it comes to learning. Or lunch, for that matter. I'm guessing that he's finally showing us Ministry Administratives a more pleasant polite side." She cackled. "You should definitely go, Weasley. See if you can get us more funding."
Ginny sighed. "I guess." She gave her friend a tired smile. "Your party was interesting, though, if a tad on the pink side. If only the trio's antagonistic entrance hadn't disrupted things -- I very much wanted to meet more people."
Pansy grinned. "Eh, well. You can have the pleasure of meeting many of them online, instead." Then she waxed poetic on some of the more nice, and some of the more weird people she had met, and how she had done everything from tackling to blocking. And then she trained her attention on Ginny, once again. "So… did you manage to snag or break a few boys' hearts before you scuttled out?"
Ginny grinned. "Well… via OkCupid, I've been talking inconsistently to a few louts, but a few more conversations with one bloke in particularly. And I did meet a man in a Mohawk who seems to fit the bill. We didn't quite discuss screennames, but… if it's him, then he sounds interesting, at the least." She sighed. "If only I knew more Muggle."
"Knowing Muggle-isms is easy, Ginny," Pansy replied. Then she looked at her watch. "But I'm not a good teacher. Have fun on your munch with Malfoy, and learn all you can. Ta!"
After Pansy left, Ginny decided to check her mail.
There was a comment from RomanceSlave:
I know who you really are. And I love how you did this! You really did your ... homework? And I can't believe the comments on the thing actually exist!
…A tad bamboozling, in an incredulous sort of way. But she always liked being recognized for work.
And a particularly appreciative comment came from bigreader2007:
Awesome profile, love ya. ~bigreader~
And another sweet comment from Acorna:
RedGin, I think your profile's great :D
And a salutation from mewmew282:
Heya! via comment, and also a message with a subject line of "=)" and a Hello!
Ginny replied: And a salutation to you, as well! Who are you?
She had no idea what the girls (er… she guessed that they were girls) meant, but decided to "approve" all of the comments. The more the merrier, yes? And perhaps she could peruse everything at a later date, thereby learning more of various Muggle intricacies.
And gwfan had asked a question:
Have you gone on a fun D8 yet? Love the story, by the way.
Ginny wasn't sure exactly what to reply to that one. Perhaps the girl had mixed her up with a friend. Ginny loved words, but she was certainly not an author. She ruefully shook her head. She had quite enjoyed Pansy's prolifically pink party, but she hadn't actually garnered any desirable dates from her Internet interactions. Though, come to think of it, she had been asked to lunch with a particularly odd Malfoy. But that was definitely not a date, and she had known the fellow prior to the online dating scene. "There's also that SilveredDragon fellow," her thoughts whispered. But had he even shown up at the party? Perhaps it had been Mr. Mohawk with the dragon pendant. Now, if only she could remember his name. Ah well… if he'd liked her, then he might've filled out a "yes" on the speed-dating cards. And if not, well… the process had just saved a lot of time, really.
Suddenly, an IM popped up, from nnjdc
Bizarre comments you have. Johnny's complete misinterpretation of meretricious is good in Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps, though not technically a new word. It's a logical assumption too.
An interesting fellow. But what did he mean?
She replied:
Bizarre comments? Would you please elaborate on that?
Well, one person thinks you're really fit (though you have no photo) and one person thinks you're living a secret life that only they know the truth of.
Hrm. She looked at her comments again.
Ah. Well, perhaps they're both quite correct.
Could be.
She decided to further the conversation: I haven't encountered your aforementioned Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps. What do you mean?
It's a brilliant sitcom that almost everyone in the world except me hates. The official bbc guide to comedy rubbishes it - which leaves me asking why they commissioned five series of it.
She was getting a tad confused. The bloke's profile seemed to be chock full of quirky character -- apparently, he wanted to be a cat "in his next life," which she supposed was a pun. However, she had the distinct feeling that she was getting in over her head. Nevertheless, she tried to keep conversing.
Goodness. Makes no sense, that.
He replied,
Indeed. Such is life. I think it's brilliant, but then it does have an episode revolving around Johnny getting agoraphobia and his girlfriend trying to cure it by making him fall in love with a giant biscuit.
Now, that definitely made even less sense. To Ginny, anyway. In the pause, he wrote,
I'm not selling this, am I?
She breathed an almost sigh of relief.
Er... Well, I think I would need to see it to really understand what you mean.
But it does sound quite interesting.
It's a work of genius, I promise you.
Though Shakespeare and Austen it ain't.
Ah, a man who knew Shakespeare and Austen. Even though he favored other works. Well, she could at least wax poetic on her favorite authors.
Well, very few of us could reach the level of Shakespeare or Austen. Though their tone is somewhat old and classical compared to what we're capable of today.
He immediately replied:
Yes. I can't pretend to be a huge shakespeare fan, in part because what was cutting edge use of language then has become truism by repetition.
Ack! And another IM suddenly tackled her. This time, it was from leadmeastray
hey
She replied to him, too:
Hello.
He wrote,
just getting through your profile.
how are you doing?
She sighed. Seemed like the same old story. She continued to check her mail. She had also been invited to an "Atomic Grind Show At CBGBs Gallery": " Your favorite circus funk fiasco returns to CBGBS gallery for a rolicking good time. NEW SONGS! CDS! IN MANHATTAN!" Well, it did sound vaguely interesting, but … alas, she was a few months behind. And was there a Manhattan in England? Silly Muggles and their sense of time and space. Or lack thereof, really.
Uh oh... her IM window popped up again. Still from leadmeastray.
??
have I managed to offend you in less than three proper sentances??
Impatient bloke, wasn't he? She felt guilty, just the same.
Oh Goodness.
No, not at all.
I'm just a bit busy at the moment.
ok
another time??
Examining his messages, she decided that she didn't quite approve of his misspellings or his double question marks. However, she decided to be polite.
Sure.
Have a good day!
He replied,
byex
"Byex"? What in the world was that? She shook her head. The blatant misspellings were somewhat cute, but grew decidedly old quite quickly. Oh no... another blinking message.
From danjuma:
hey,luv
Hrm... that didn't look too propitious. She typed back anyway.
Hello.
hw u doing
Egad. Lack of punctuation really gave her a headache.
Erm, good.
have gone for dinner
i thought u are no more around
Now he was being confusing AND ungrammatical. Not a particularly winning combination.
Pardon?
my name is daniel
She took a peek at his profile. Ah. She didn't quite have time for a chap whose profile was so focused on sex.
Um, I'm rather busy at the moment.
thats ok
That was it. No capitalization or apostrophes, either? She shook her head.
Good bye.
bye.................
Ugh. She decided to use the "block" feature -- Pansy had just described it that morning, talking about some guy who had been utterly focused on toe rings. Granted, Pansy's suitor had been a bit more odd, but Ginny was getting much more grouchy these days.
Oh no... and yet another IM. From dz-mc. With the same old "how r u" and blah blah. Well, she guessed the boring chaps had discovered online dating, as well. This one was badgering her about "hopin 2 go out 2nite" with a "u live in London" and "u aint got photo on ur profile" and "soz to hammer with many questions at once" -- all in all, quite appalling for her sense of grammar and polite conversation. She quickly said, "good-bye" and blocked this bloke as well. Then she returned to her conversation with the more intellectual nnjdc. His last IM had been:
Yes. I can't pretend to be a huge shakespeare fan, in part because what was cutting edge use of language then has become truism by repetition.
She pondered that for a bit.
"To be or not to be" being a cliche, and all that?
He replied,
Well that's less of a cliche and more of, erm, a nonsense.
All the world's a stage. That sort of thing.
Hrm... A nonsense? How could Shakespeare be nonsensical?
I doubt it's a nonsense, really...
I'd like to think that it asks why or how we choose to exist.
But perhaps the world's a stage; I've certainly met many players.
She giggled to herself. Quidditch players and people players alike. Draco Malfoy, for example, seemed to fit the bill for both types.
He was saying,
Well yes, it does. What it says fundamentally is "God I'm depressed and everything's a mess, shall I kill myself or shall I do something about it".
All the world might well be a stage, but it's cliche now.
She wasn't quite sure where he was going with that. But he did sound remarkably intelligent, compared to the other people who had just IM'd her.
In the pause, he wrote,
Well, I think so anyway.
She almost laughed.
I'm sorry for taking so long to respond; some ah... less intelligent company is badgering me with messages and I'm trying to disentangle myself from those conversations while being somewhat polite.
Not that blocking was all that polite, of course. But her online personality could do whatever she wanted, and she didn't have to face the would-be suitors. "Ah, efficiency," she thought, "thy synonym is 'online d8.'"
He had replied,
Goodness. Well, at least I'm not the biggest thickie online today.
She grinned.
Oh, no, not at all. You're quite entertaining, in fact.
Entertaining... mmm, could be worse I suppose!
She decided to continue perusing her eight new messages. Hrm...
She had missed an instant message from Jencakes:
Hey. What's up? ^_^
She grinned. That "^_^" looked so cute -- like a little smiley face. She replied:
Hello! I'm sorry I missed you. I was just beleaguered by oodles of IMs from not-so-intelligent men, and I'm glad to have gotten a relatively normal, as well as grammatically correct and correctly capitalized intstant message. :) How are you, and what are you up to?
Next in her Inbox, there was a message from BoyWhoLived:
Hi,
My name is Harry. I just signed up for this, and was browsing about, when your profile caught my eye--despite that you don't have any pictures, you seem like an interesting person. Plus, we're from the same area--where in London do you live, exactly? Perhaps I know it.
Actually, now that I read your profile, you seem vaguely familiar...maybe we've met before. You have red hair, huh? My best friend has red hair--the whole family does. That's pretty unique, isn't it? Anyway, I just wanted to drop you a message and see if perhaps we could chat some time.
Thank you,
Harry P.
Oh dear Merlin. Was the great and glorious Harry Potter using a Muggle dating site? Perhaps Pansy and the OkCupid Administrator had been too persuasive. In any case, how had the Boy Wonder found her?
She hurriedly signed off from the instant messaging and the intelligent nnjdc.
Alas, however -- I just realized there's something I forgot to do, and I need to go do it. :( But hopefully, we can chat at another time?
Good-bye for now!
That said, she sat at her desk and looked at the Harry message. Panicking. Hadn't the BoyWhoLived been living with TheGirlWhoReadEverySingleBookEver, when she'd last checked? Perhaps he was sniffing out wizards or witches on the site. Was it an undercover sort of job, in conjunction with all of those "professional secrets" he used to keep from her? Hrm... after another bout of worry, and a snuff of righteous indignation, her mischievous streak took over. She'd replied to most of her messages, so… why not message him back? No harm in it, right?
Hello, Harry --
Thank you for your message! I live somewhat near a not-so-public Alley. There seem to be quite a few of them around here.
I happen to believe that many people in London have met many other people in London -- if not officially, then perhaps on the train or in passing. It's quite mind-boggling, really, all of the connections that we can make unknowingly.
Red hair seems to be quite common, to be honest. I passed three people on the street today with my exact shade. Your profile mentions that you're good at saving the world. How often is that necessary, really? I do agree that Knowledge (is power), and I definitely couldn't do without it.
Thanks again for your message; it's quite nice to receive a message from a nice person. Have a good day! :)
-Red
She felt a tad guilty at signing it "Red" when he had put his real name. But seriously -- "Ginny" was much less common than "Harry" around London. And she was well-"read." Quite punny, that. She perused the profile once more. Grr… he had also put that he was "particularly inclined towards Asians." The nerve of that boy. And where was SilveredDragon?
-x-
Draco Malfoy was quite busy. He had accounts to run, businesses to oversee, and mail to check. Ah, the siren call of OkCupid and its blinking boxes. He opened his mailbox.
Egads. In bold-faced font was a plethora of woos. From stephaniesays_ ("Says what, exactly?" he wondered), TaintedInnocent ("Hrm…Oxymoronic bint, there."), Alygirll29 ("Similar to Diagon Alley? Aly? Can she spell?"), imelda72 ("I meld a? What does she meld?"), megthedamsel ("Well, lucky she isn't Meg-the-Man."), and Punkin02 ("Squash. Twice.").
Despite his typically snarky mental comments, he preened. They'd all woo'd within a few days of each other, however, so… he was starting to suspect a conspiracy. Or, at the least, a few bits of evidence for womanly cycles. He decided to once again bypass the woos, and focus on the actual messages. Time, efficiency, and all of that logic, after all. With a distinctive relish, he handled his mouse with expert grace and clicked on the first message.
From: Lorinna
To: SilveredDragon
Subject: you
you sound like a deflated pig. non?
Ah. Well then. Not quite his cup of tea, but such insolence would decidedly not be encouraged.
From: SilveredDragon
To: Lorinna
Subject: Re: you
"Non" is correct. While I respect pork, I am personally never "deflated;" in fact, my ego is healthily inflated at all times. That said, I will hereby assume that you will be most appreciative of this fact.
Disgruntled, he moved on.
From: Punkin02
To: SilveredDragon
Subject: (none)
Hello,
Hopefully I can be intriguing enough as to not waste your time. Although I admit I am much better at conversing online than off. I'm much to much of a dreamer, I focus better when writing. Anyways, you have mercuric eyes? That sounds captivating, I've always found eyes that were of a color not the norm to be quite beautiful. Hope to hear from you.
He inwardly groaned. The girl was from the States. While he respected those Americans, he couldn't quite fathom trying to understand those atrocious accents. And this girl liked online conversations better than real ones. With his obvious online attraction, he didn't quite have time for such a "relationship." He wondered if she had any relation to the pink sweater and red glasses girl from Pansy's party. He then noticed that she had asked only one question amidst the babble, and decided to be succinct.
From: Silvered Dragon
To: Punkin02
Subject: Re:
Yes.
Brilliant. Purely Malfoy, without going against his mother's age-old adage, "Draco, have some manners! Reply when spoken to, and respond to correspondence. Malfoys have an image to uphold."
The next message was actually quite entertaining:
From: imelda72
To: Silvered Dragon
Subject: Mmmm
Cunning linguist, are you? Care to let me assess your skills next Friday?
;-) imelda
He smirked. At least this girl had good taste. He often favored the direct approach. But then he looked at her location, and sighed.
From: Silvered Dragon
To: imelda72
Subject: Re: Mmmm
Alas, New York is not within my immediate plans for travel. However, if you opt to travel to London, perhaps we can share a most delicious repartee. In the meantime, you may have my utmost sympathy for missing my exhibition of labial skill.
He looked at his reply. It didn't sound quite right, but he seemed a tad off today. Too high-faluting, perhaps. A bit lofty. But his standards were growing quite astronomical, these days. He allowed himself a second to think about RedGin, and wondered where she was.
Another message was a tad worrying:
From:
To: mewmew282:
Hello! You do sound familiar.....do I know you?
He dearly hoped not. While the girl's profile was just a shade fascinating, her profile also stated that she was merely seventeen. As he was not wont to indulge in illicitly-aged affairs of the younger nature (again, that was Zabini's area of expertise), he decided to go against his mother's commands. He closed the OkCupid window. After all, he had a lunch to attend to.
Draco grumbled. He still wasn't quite sure why he'd initiated the meeting, or if he really wanted to keep talking to Weasel-the-Youngest. But anything was better than being bored, really. And he needed to eat some time, didn't he? He could always bait her and watch her complexion diffuse with scarlet. Always amusing, in the Weasley expense.
Just as he was leaving his office, Pansy caught up with him. Despite his best efforts to pointedly ignore her, she said, "Now, there, Draconis Maximums. I like the little weasel. She helped me with decorations, and she's quite a sweet girl to have around. You be good. Or else."
And, with that, she swept away.
-x-
Ginny was nervous. They had set a time and place in the atrium the day before, and she supposed that, if the goose didn't show, she would have a pleasant lunch anyway. But, all in all, she was nervous. Which was a warning sign, really. But a good sign, she supposed. It means that she was still thinking with her wits. It also meant that this could not have been a date. Typically, before a date, she had learned a bit about the bloke, and was always prepared to be bored stiff. She knew quite a bit about one Draco Malfoy, and she was nervous. Of course, her dates had always been such nice, sensible-sounding gentlemen. And Malfoy was, at best, unpredictable. Oh, well. She supposed that if he tried anything remotely odd, or if he suddenly abducted her or locked her in the dungeons, she could hope that Pansy would wander by eventually. Ah, Pansy.
"Yes, indeed. Parkinson is quite a driving force."
Ginny whipped around in surprise. But there was only Malfoy, wearing a light blue collared shirt and gray slacks. She realized belatedly that she must have mused aloud. She smiled. "But she throws an interesting sort of party, really."
He shuddered. "Yes. The pink sort." He looked her up and down quickly. "Nice… ah… nice dress, Weasley."
She started in surprise. She was wearing a rather nice dress, but his manner seemed rather… forced. She suddenly scowled. "Malfoy, I don't know what you're playing at, and it's totally odd to listen to you… ah… being nice, but I want to learn about Muggle stuffs, and you offered to teach me, so let's just have lunch, okay? Just don't be odd. Be natural." She waved her fingers airily, and then her manners, well-honed from the many dates she had participated in, suddenly flared to life. She smiled again, and promptly changed the subject. "Did you find any suitable dates at the party?"
He looked slightly peeved, and then his frown cleared. "Actually, I think your usual cronies disrupted our merry band of aspiring daters. But I hear that they all got along very well with the Muggle crowd. They spotted Mr. Ollivander, for one, and then Potter waggled his eyebrows rather disgustingly at a few of the Asian schoolgirls in the room. And I think the Mud--ah, Granger even cooperated in making a speed-dating card, sprinkled with not one, not three, but ten immensely erudite adjectives."
She laughed. "What were your adjectives?"
"Oh, some obviously truthful descriptive words." He couldn't quite remember, to be honest. Oh, yes -- "honest and modest." Eh, whatever. But… now that he thought about it, hadn't her carded adjectives sounded a tad familiar? Then again, he'd been forced to peruse a plethora of profiles. Perhaps a few of the ladies had significant overlap. There was no telling, with the female mind. But was learning the female mind really necessary?
"Of course learning is necessary, Malfoy."
He blinked. What exactly had he said aloud? He decided to opt for a blanket vague statement. "Learning? Yes, indeed. And what do you like to learn, Weasley?"
She looked a bit startled. "Well, I'm quite enthusiastic about vocabulary, but perhaps it's because words are so aesthetically pleasing. But I'm also trying to learn various facets of muggle-dom, especially via people on this online dating site. Which is why I'm participating, really. And lunching with you. Though heaven knows why a Malfoy would know about Muggle life."
"I'll have you know, Weasley, that I am a highly profitable businessman, and my business involves knowing everything about whom I do business with. I have a profound ability to adapt. I do what I do, and, like any Malfoy, I do it well. Now, you mentioned Muggle-dom?" Despite himself, he was curious. "Which aspects, in particular?"
She shrugged. "Well, dancing, perhaps. Muggles have such different forms than we do."
He scoffed. "Dancing is simple, Weasley. Nothing a few small lessons wouldn't instill."
She laughed. "Maybe so. I'd definitely need the lessons to begin with. But Pansy took me to a Muggle club a few weeks ago, and, contrary to popular belief, some of the Muggle dancing I've seen doesn't really seem like the type you can learn via lessons."
He harrumphed. "I profoundly disagree." He was irritated. How dare this poor Weasley imply that a Malfoy couldn't perform well?
"Malfoy, I bet you… oh, I don't know -- this Swiss casserole -- that you couldn't learn some of the Muggle dancing I've seen."
His pride slightly smarting, Draco replied through gritted teeth, "Never let it be said that a Malfoy refused such a simple bet. A Malfoy can learn anything. And excel, accordingly."
Ginny looked thoughtful. "All right, Malfoy. How about this? I'll take you to a Muggle club, and you can see how quickly you can learn. If you can't dance sufficiently Muggle-ish at the end of the night, you'll have to… hmm… give me dancing lessons, maybe?" She giggled. "Though, if you show that you can't dance, then perhaps you should take dancing lessons with me, instead."
He practically growled. "And if I win the bet, Weasley, as I undoubtedly shall?"
She waved her hand airily. "Oh, anything, really."
He suddenly recalled an aspect of their conversation from the previous night. Suddenly feeling charitable, he grinned. "Weasley, if I win, we will partake in a different sort of lesson. I shall, ah… introduce you to the concept of the mysterious Muggle 'porn'. And no, it is not a fruit."
-x-
Later in her office, Ginny realized that she had actually had a pleasant conversation with Draco Malfoy. Perhaps she didn't have to despair about the woeful paucity of cute dateable men after all -- wait a second. Was she actually considering a Malfoy to be dateable? No, not at all. She shook her head violently. But, as she now had an escort to a Muggle club, she could utilize her resources, especially if he was a good teacher.
She suddenly noticed a blinking box on her screen. SilveredDragon!
So... typed RedGin. What do you think of Mohawks?
-x-
Note#1: I'm trying various formattings, and, at the end of the story, I'll probably edit everything so that it's uniform. Which format do you think looks the best?
Note#2: The comments that mention the story itself will be approved once the story's complete. Likewise, all "friend requests" to Draco will be approved then, as well. Ginny's a bit more friendly, so she's already approved quite a few people as friends. Thanks so much for your feedback!
Note#3: When RedGin logged on, she was promptly beleaguered with IM conversations. Nnjdc and leadmeastray and danjuma and dz-mc are real people, though, I think. Eeek! Feel free to message them, if you're interested...
Note#4: Uber-props-and-kudos to whomever made the BoyWhoLived profile. It is absolutely spiffingly Brilliant. And if I'd had to guess what Harry would be, it would've totally been a Poolboy. Oddly enough, I'm dating a Poolboy right now who looks like Draco Malfoy -- tall and blond hair and light grayish eyes and all. :oD
Note#5:
Messages to RedGin:
From imelda72: Too bad we can't get a picture up here... What are you doing running around with a Hornivore, my dear? Don't you know Malfoys are bad for your health?
I signed up on this site because of your fic, twiddlekinks. It's highly amusing--site and fic!
From RedGin: I have no idea what you're talking about, really...
From Twiddlekinks: It seems that people message Malfoy directly, and then me through RedGin, and then I have to keep telling her that she'll find out about all this fuss eventually. But… Thank you all so much for your feedback!
Note#6: Oh dear… I was up at 1150p, Eastern Standard Time, working on the story. And RedGin got an IM from topman82. And he said:
topman82: hiiii
redgin: and hello to you, as well
topman82: than u
topman82: am very well
topman82: though its 5 am
topman82: but am here as am watchin cricket
topman82: heheheh
topman82: so how u doin.?
redgin: haha
topman82: how cum here now...
redgin: i'm quite well, as well
topman82: good
redgin: er... i actually am on a business trip
redgin: and it's only 11:48pm for me
topman82: to?
redgin: the states
topman82: where abt states/
topman82: basically where u from?
*** topman82's IC window is closed
…Phew. I hate running away from anything, but I'm glad he closed first. I had no idea what to say. Gak!!
Note#7: And spacewatcher wrote a message with the subject line "nice livejournal :P"… so I'm assuming that he's not too heartbroken by our heroine's "true" identity. Phew! …Wait a second. There's a "redgin.livejournal.com" -- poor girl. My apologies!
Note#8: I can't really put comments about the story in the story, but here are a few of the correspondences, for your own enjoyment:
From: sarcasticnature
Really, Draco, your just too much! Get over yourself and get a life. Loser!
Lol, just playin, you know I love you!
Interesting, isn't it? I think I'd actually really like SilveredDragon if I met him, loserific-ego and all. Of course, the fantastic hair and the mercuric eyes, as well as the cunning linguistic activity would probably help quite a bit. :)
From: companyofwolves
To: SilveredDragon
Subject: Cauliflower...
is the most underappreciated form of flora on the planet.
I must confess your exploits are highly amusing, Mr. Malfoy.
Cheers.
From: SilveredDragon
To: companyofwolves
Subject: Re: Cauliflower...
Indeed.
I am most pleased to hear of your excellent taste, both culinarily and literarily. However, I have my own confession to make: how in the name of all Merlin's facial hair do all of you know my name?
From: companyofwolves
To: SilveredDragon
Ah, Mr. Malfoy, you might want to track down a very clever person named twiddlekinks.
Highly enjoyable and grammatically fine work, I promise.
hahahaha Oh, now you've gone and done it, lass. Draco's going to get a bit miffed, especially at me.
Note#9: Thanks to all of you who commented, sent a message or IM, and/or added RedGin and SilveredDragon as friends. Ginny's pretty easygoing, and will probably add anyone. Draco's a little uptight, and a bit more protective of his privacy. In other words, in accordance with his snotty blue-blooded mannerisms, he has yet to accept anyone. Maybe, in the end, Ginny can soften him up. ;)
Note#10: A Muggle club? Oooh la la. Haha Then again, I'm a sucker for good dancers, especially ones as hot, snarky, and intelligent as one Draco Malfoy. If you've got ideas, let me know. ;)
Ginny Weasley and the Online D8 via DracoandGinny.Com
*The story was actually taken off Fanfic.Net b/c of its interactive nature. Ah well... If you know of any sites that would host it, let me know! :)