it is not difference which immobilizes us, but silence. and there are so many silences to be broken.
Quote above by Audre Lorde.
FemSex..we watched above video for our Violence Against Women unit. Oddly enough, it was one of the most empowering units we had, which I think was due mostly to the incredible healing and safety of Tuesday night's class.But today was the Womyn's empowerment unit, and I think pairing the two together like that was just brilliant, because those two experiences will be forever linked in my mind. They have come together to give me one of the most amazing weeks of my life, and I hope I never lose this wonderful, heart-tingling skin-warming feeling. I wanted to cross post the entry I just submitted to the FemSex writeboard, since it is such an accurate description of how powerful I am feeling right now.
“It is not difference which immobilizes us, but silence. And there are so many silences to be broken."
I definitely agree with above quote, though I would like to say that it’s not only silence but also a lack of truth and an excess of white noise. All my life I’ve had friends, people I hung out with and considered myself close with, but if you asked me if I loved any of those people, my silence would likely have told you what I do not wish to put into words: no, I don’t. I care for them and truly enjoy their presence, but what I feel for them isn’t love. I think this is because I was never honest with my friends. Our interactions consisted of white noise-we talked and played and had fun, but never once had an open, honest dialogue about anything of depth or consequence, our personal lives, anything that mattered to us. And that white noise, or silence, or whatever you want to call it did immobilize us, and it kept each of us isolated from each other.
FemSex has shown me that differences can actually bring people closer together when they are talked about. The open, honest discussion that has occurred in this class has given me new insights into what it means to be human, and it has brought me to feel love for you all. If you’d talked to me on January first of this year and told me that I would come to have such love for all you wonderful, beautiful, FemSexy people, I would have laughed in your face. Many of you said tonight that you feel at peace, but I am not. Instead I’m filled with this kinetic passion that’s making my skin tingle to get up and go and talk to people, communicate, learn more about them, and create a safe space that can help them heal and empower themselves. I do not wish to be silent and immobilized any longer.
Bring on the silence so that I can kick it down!
And for the record, I am so on the FemSex train that I have programmed my computer to recognize FemSex as a real word. To me, FemSex is the best way I can describe my new found state of mind where I feel empowered and I seek to bring that powerful, beautiful feeling to others. Starting with my mom. :]
Soooo yeah. Last semester I was just feeling so lost and miserable, and I wanted to drop out, but now I feel like the reason I am at Berkeley is so I could take this class. It was absolutely life changing.So for some context about today's syrupy gushings, we did this activity which is a lot like that thumbs up/seven up game I played in elementary school during rainy-day lunches. Actually, scratch that, because I have no idea how we actually played that game, all I remember was that we put our heads down on our desks and there was tapping involved...which is what we did in FemSex today. So one of our facilitators would pick three people to go around tapping people who fit the descriptions of the question given: "Tap someone you think is beautiful," "Tap someone you think is strong," "Tap someone who is a positive force in your life," etc. The tap-ees had no idea who was tapping them, all you knew was that other people thought you were beautiful, strong, that you made people laugh and that you inspire them. And at first I would sit there and just not expect to get tapped, and I was all down on myself like "oh I'm not beautiful." Whatever. And then I'd get tapped and I was like "Fuck yeah, I'm beautiful." But when I'd been putting myself down, I'd been thinking of physical appearances; when I was tapped, I was rejoicing because I somehow knew that it was beautiful in FemSex speak--that I am radiant and a beautiful person, even if I don't look like some kind of supermodel or whatever. Then I did some tapping, and when I sat back down, I was just trying to send psychic messages out to others about who I would tap. It was empowering. I wasn't just trashing myself and then being surprised when I found out I was wrong (though I was still surprised at some of the statements I'd been tapped for). I was trying to make others feel the way I did. And that's empowerment. I felt it. I knew I was beautiful/strong/etc, and I was trying to make others feel the same. It's like the safe space epiphany I had last night: a safe space isn't just a space you feel safe in, but a space you feel safe in and actively try to make others feel safe in as well, even if it's just listening without judgment to what someone else has to say.
Fuck, I just feel so good right now. I'm reminded of a quote from The Hunger Games (I love you forever, Suzanne Collins):
"I am not pretty. I am not beautiful. I am as radiant as the sun."
Click to viewFemSex..we watched above video for our Violence Against Women unit. Oddly enough, it was one of the most empowering units we had, which I think was due mostly to the incredible healing and safety of Tuesday night's class.But today was the Womyn's empowerment unit, and I think pairing the two together like that was just brilliant, because those two experiences will be forever linked in my mind. They have come together to give me one of the most amazing weeks of my life, and I hope I never lose this wonderful, heart-tingling skin-warming feeling. I wanted to cross post the entry I just submitted to the FemSex writeboard, since it is such an accurate description of how powerful I am feeling right now.
“It is not difference which immobilizes us, but silence. And there are so many silences to be broken."
I definitely agree with above quote, though I would like to say that it’s not only silence but also a lack of truth and an excess of white noise. All my life I’ve had friends, people I hung out with and considered myself close with, but if you asked me if I loved any of those people, my silence would likely have told you what I do not wish to put into words: no, I don’t. I care for them and truly enjoy their presence, but what I feel for them isn’t love. I think this is because I was never honest with my friends. Our interactions consisted of white noise-we talked and played and had fun, but never once had an open, honest dialogue about anything of depth or consequence, our personal lives, anything that mattered to us. And that white noise, or silence, or whatever you want to call it did immobilize us, and it kept each of us isolated from each other.
FemSex has shown me that differences can actually bring people closer together when they are talked about. The open, honest discussion that has occurred in this class has given me new insights into what it means to be human, and it has brought me to feel love for you all. If you’d talked to me on January first of this year and told me that I would come to have such love for all you wonderful, beautiful, FemSexy people, I would have laughed in your face. Many of you said tonight that you feel at peace, but I am not. Instead I’m filled with this kinetic passion that’s making my skin tingle to get up and go and talk to people, communicate, learn more about them, and create a safe space that can help them heal and empower themselves. I do not wish to be silent and immobilized any longer.
Bring on the silence so that I can kick it down!
And for the record, I am so on the FemSex train that I have programmed my computer to recognize FemSex as a real word. To me, FemSex is the best way I can describe my new found state of mind where I feel empowered and I seek to bring that powerful, beautiful feeling to others. Starting with my mom. :]
Soooo yeah. Last semester I was just feeling so lost and miserable, and I wanted to drop out, but now I feel like the reason I am at Berkeley is so I could take this class. It was absolutely life changing.So for some context about today's syrupy gushings, we did this activity which is a lot like that thumbs up/seven up game I played in elementary school during rainy-day lunches. Actually, scratch that, because I have no idea how we actually played that game, all I remember was that we put our heads down on our desks and there was tapping involved...which is what we did in FemSex today. So one of our facilitators would pick three people to go around tapping people who fit the descriptions of the question given: "Tap someone you think is beautiful," "Tap someone you think is strong," "Tap someone who is a positive force in your life," etc. The tap-ees had no idea who was tapping them, all you knew was that other people thought you were beautiful, strong, that you made people laugh and that you inspire them. And at first I would sit there and just not expect to get tapped, and I was all down on myself like "oh I'm not beautiful." Whatever. And then I'd get tapped and I was like "Fuck yeah, I'm beautiful." But when I'd been putting myself down, I'd been thinking of physical appearances; when I was tapped, I was rejoicing because I somehow knew that it was beautiful in FemSex speak--that I am radiant and a beautiful person, even if I don't look like some kind of supermodel or whatever. Then I did some tapping, and when I sat back down, I was just trying to send psychic messages out to others about who I would tap. It was empowering. I wasn't just trashing myself and then being surprised when I found out I was wrong (though I was still surprised at some of the statements I'd been tapped for). I was trying to make others feel the way I did. And that's empowerment. I felt it. I knew I was beautiful/strong/etc, and I was trying to make others feel the same. It's like the safe space epiphany I had last night: a safe space isn't just a space you feel safe in, but a space you feel safe in and actively try to make others feel safe in as well, even if it's just listening without judgment to what someone else has to say.
Fuck, I just feel so good right now. I'm reminded of a quote from The Hunger Games (I love you forever, Suzanne Collins):
"I am not pretty. I am not beautiful. I am as radiant as the sun."